Every other time my boyfriend and I go to the bar, he gets too drunk, and something really bad happens.
So when we go to the bar, I dread something bad happening, and if I do finally losen up and don't 'babysit' him all night, he gets too drunk and does irrepairable damage to our relationship.
We agreed that the only way to guarentee that he won't get so drunk that he does something stupid, is to not drink at all.
Well, he refuses to give up drinking, unless I come up with something "fun" to do on the weekends. He argues that all we do is work every day, and he wants to enjoy at least one night a week.
He doesn't enjoy bowling, or dining out, or rollerskating, and going to the movies is the same to him as renting a movie and staying at home. He doesn't want to stay at home, no matter what we do at home. Of course all of his friends drink on the weekends, which makes my task that much harder.
It's too cold to go swimming or fishing.
Any suggestions?
2007-11-20 03:21:59 · 14 answers · asked by Maxine 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Time to re-evaluate the nature,direction& status of your relationship. Its over. Go have fun. Get a new guy. Or not.
2007-11-20 03:30:45 · answer #1 · answered by Bender 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Excuse me. Don't you recognize the warning signs of alcoholism? The "only" fun he has is getting drunk and wasted? Hellooo? You are in for one helluva roller coaster life that will be no fun if you stay in this relationship. I got out of a situation like this after 8 years. Because he only drank on weekends and had a good job, I made myself believe that the weekend binges were not that bad. But in the end, it was everyday drinking, and even though he still kept the job, the alcohol made him abusive, uncaring and even our child was affected by the drinking. You may think you cannot live without "him", but if you make the break, you will wonder why it took you so long. On the other side is sanity.
2007-11-20 03:32:54 · answer #2 · answered by BrendaK F 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you can still go out, just need to control the drinking. if he doesn't want to go on the "typical dates" - aka dinner, movie, entertainment event. then you are kind of out of luck because yeah most people dont' want to sit around and do nothing. You could try maybe going to an event, like a basketball or hockey game or something. or do something just the 2 of you and then meet up with friends at the bars. or leave the bars early. Sounds like there may be aproblem if he is drinking that much anyways. so u might want to find out why he chooses to drink so much especially knowing that it causes damage to your so called "relationship." otherwise i say forget about the alcoholic and go find someone who can control their drinking habits
2007-11-20 03:28:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure, lets make his drinking problem YOUR problem. That's called transference.
Your bf has a problem and you know as well as I do that one day something bad "Will" happen.
Even if he doesn't hurt someone (or get hurt), his drinking will only bring you down as a woman and as a person.
Sorry girl, but you have made a bad decision in picking a guy and it's time you make some adult decisions. Finding another way to amuse him is not the answer,
Good luck
2007-11-20 03:29:58 · answer #4 · answered by we_are_legion99 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
does he like video games?? that fixed my problem-just buy him a new game an console-he'll be glued to his seat!
No, seriously, you should try the alternating drink method, maybe limit him to one drink an hour and then quench his thirst with ice water/virgin drink in between time! soda speeds up alcohol absorbtion I think, so try lots of water or juices.....he could always eat something before hand and sip his drinks too....you dont always have to drink to get drunk, a good lil buzz on is much more fun than all out slobbering in my opinion....
2007-11-20 03:29:06 · answer #5 · answered by thatsmissustoyou 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe is has a drinking problem. I'm completely against drinking and like, my boyfriend said that he'd stop drinking for me because he doesn't wanna hurt me. Although, he did break that promise just a while ago. He said he wouldn't do it again though...
If he doesn't have fun just being with you, I don't know what you can do. Is he worth it?
2007-11-20 03:26:55 · answer #6 · answered by Terra 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He wants peace and fun,try to cultivate habit of Yoga,try to find out what are his hobbies , attending to which should be a solution. Better go to places of interest in and around your area .Prepare a joint timetable of his interest for the week end,which will make him feel that he is getting his due importance
2007-11-20 03:32:10 · answer #7 · answered by ubp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bowling, an arcade, the movies, dinner, indoor go carts (if you have one around)
I know it is hard to find things to do especially in rural areas and northern areas (I live in northern VT- nothing here) but down south and in cities there is generally more to do in my experience (lived in NC for 5 yrs)
2007-11-20 03:47:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most people can drink safely, but a small % of people can't. Simple. It doesn't get better. Some thing bad will continue to happen.
2007-11-20 03:35:27 · answer #9 · answered by Bob H 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
get away from this guy. if the only thing he finds fun is drinking, he is not very adventerous or creative. if you're not already, you're going to get real bored with this cat. the sad thing is you might stay with him until someone who knows and appreciates what your idea of fun is comes along. you may end up cheating with that person on this guy. worst of all, you may stay with this guy and be stuck in horror being victimized buy his drunken "fun" incidents...
G-E-T O-U-T!
2007-11-20 03:27:20 · answer #10 · answered by DF 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋