help! how should i handle this?

Question

ok my boyfriend and i have been together for... 5 weeks... and my parents still dont know... and the reason they dont know is cuz he is not of the same faith as i am.. (i am 21) and i KNOW my parents will FLIP out... when and how should i tell them!? i dont want to go thru all that if i dont even know if we will end up together, im thinking about waiting til they move back to california probably next summer/fall.. should i wait til im out of the house? im so scared! i need help!!!

Answer 1

Yeah I would wait until you know there is a future with him, if you think your parents will flip out, then get to know your BF first, if you really like him and know you two will be together for a while, then they are just going to have to accept it! You're a grown woman!

Answer 2

It's only been 5 weeks. Give it some time before you reveal anything to your parents right now. When this relationship take a turn for the serious side then you and your boyfriend should sit down and talk about how to speak to your parents. Don't start panicking now. If you feel that you want to introduce him to them, then let your parents know that you want them to meet your newest friend. Even though you are an young adult it scary to piss of you parents. But don't worry they'll be pissed off with you from this point until they realize that you an adult. (LOL) Letting go of our children is a very hard change in life. As a parent we only want the best for our kids. Relax and enjoy your life don't worry everything will fall into place. For all you know this relationship might bloom or it might fizzle then you can decide what you need to do. Good luck and God Bless

Answer 3

You are 21. You have your own life. You're not a kid and your parents have no control over who you date. Just tell them, like casually at the table or something, that you have a boyfriend who is Jewish (or whatever faith he is). Let them flip. I they forbid you from seeing him tell them you re an adult and do not appreciate their controlling behavior. Say it nicely. Don't be all up in their faces and screaming. They may kick you out for that. If you know that they really dislike the idea, tell them after you have a plan to move out. That way if they kick you out you can just say "okay, I'll call the apartment buildings and tell them I am buying that apartment". they will be shocked at your responsibility, and possibly at your preparation for being kicked out (which will make them feel guilty). I f you don't want to tell them, DON''T. It's not their life. BTW, what faith are the two of you?

Answer 4

u should get out of the house if ur 21 and my parents didn't like my boyfriend and still dont and i am having his baby. i told them that i was having a friend over after i was already seeing him for 3 months and they didn't know. i just acted like we were friends then waited another month and told them we were dating. they didn't have a problem at first til he got kicked out of school then they didn't like him and still dont 2 1/2 years later. i would just act like ur friends then say u found interest in him and wanted to date

Answer 5

If it's not going to be a long term thing, or your not sure it's a long term thing there is no need to tell them anything. Your an adult with your own ideals and apparently don't feel a need to conform. If it looks as if this relationship is going to blossom into a long term relationship then it will be time to break the news to them. If you feel they won't understand simply explain that you have been dating for a while and you felt they should know and that you have already made a decision and their approval/disapproval will not effect your feelings or relationship with him one way or the other. They can accept your decision and determine whethere they like the guy for who and what he believes in or they can reject him without knowing him and thus damage your relationship with them. let them decide.

Answer 6

Go with your gut feeling. If you think the relationship probably won't last then don't bother telling them, but if you care a lot about your boyfriend and the relationship then I would tell them that. It seems like they should be happy if you are + your 21 so they'd need to get over it!

Answer 7

You're 21 years old and an adult. If he's good to you, then do what is best for you. Faith can cause a lot of problems in relationship. If you are strong in yours and he is strong in his, the problems will come down the road with marriage and children.

What church to go to, which church to get married, which religious holidays to celebrate and not celebrate ect. Think about the long term effects. Be realistic because love conquers many things. Strong beliefs in conflicting religions is not one of them.

Answer 8

ok...talk to your parents. but do NOT telling them you have been going out. My ex and I had the same problem. Wwe went out for like 4 months, and my mom didn't even know. Then i just told my mom that he asked me out, and we didn't want to go out behind your back or something like that.

You are 21 right? ig you are 21 it is your decision. Mom doesn't tell you at that age if you are allowed to date. i was 11 and i was going out and that was scary. But 21 i think you are old enough to make your own decisions.

Answer 9

I understand how you feel as i was in the same boat as you years back. I and my boyfriend has been going on together since Mar 2004. We are of different faith as well. My dad wasnt too happy about it and ignored him whenever i brought him home. He refused to acknowledge him.

After 4 long years, beginning of this year, my dad spoke to me about my relationship. He was willing to accept him so long i do not forget my faith and convert to his. I thank my mum and sis in helping me to convince my dad. I am getting engaged in end Dec this year.

As for you, since both your parents are involved, i would say let this relationship carry on for maybe another 2 years until you are sure he is the right man for you then pick up your courage and speak to them. They will definitely understand you as they love you and will do anything for your happiness. Trust me.

Answer 10

I would tell them, when I first started dating my x I didn't want to tell my parents because he was 5 years older than me but when they found out they were thrilled with it but hurt that I didn't trust them enough to confide in them. So my vote is tell them but don't just say "hey mom I'm dating ......" be more like "mom I really like this guy..... and he is so important to me. it would really mean a lot if i had you approval"
Well Good Luck!