I'm 28 and he's 46....does he really care?

Question

Many of you helped me one month ago when I asked if there was too much difference between me and this man.
Now we have been together for more than a month and...
Physical attraction is at the top, he's sweet and protective but I have to ask you some things:
1. I don't understand if he really cares or only thinks about sex
2. People ALWAYS look at us when we go out...they seem to wonder why I'm with him (he looks older than his age)
3. Plus, my sister would like to meet him because she knows I'm fine with him but....I'm sure I would feel extremely embarassed if she met him...I'm sure she will tell me she doesn' t like him as he's too old...I'd be ashamed....

What can I do?
THANKS and lots of love to U all

Answer 1

sorry to say but it sounds like your just in it for the sex too. look i have been in a big gap relationship before and felt the same things you are ... wonderful, happy, protected, sexy when he is around and as soon as hes not your wondering what the hellll am i doing! i know the feeling its not love its infatuation. you want the older stronger man to love you. You probably didn't have the greatest relationship with your dad. if you can't even introduce him to your sister then its obviously not going to go anywhere so continue to screw him and not introduce him to any one or leave him and meet some one you won't be embarrassed to bring home. good luck.

Answer 2

1. sex or really caring: do you talk, do you spend time together doing other things besides sex?

2. Stares of other people: ignore them, there's always going to be someone who stares at you for some reason. you just may be noticing them more because you are sensitive to the age difference.

3. If your sister knows he's older than you, then it shouldn't be a shock to her.

If you are happy in the relationship, then don't worry about what people outside of the relationship think. That worry is just wasted energy on your part, they don't have to live your life, you do.

I don't understand why you feel embarassed or ashamed at the age difference. If it really is bothering you and sucking your enjoyment of the relationship away, then maybe he's not the guy for you. Also something to explore: Is it really the age difference that bothers you or is there something else about him or the relationship that is bothering you but the age difference is easy to focus on.

It's alright to not want to be with someone even though they are perfect for you on paper. You don't have to live with the paper, you have to live with the reality.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

18 years between you and this man. It's a large maturity gap which is alright if, you don't plan to have children together. I married a man with 16 years between us. It is a huge gap when it comes to just life in general. But what really sucks is they are far closer to 65 than you are. You'll be 47 and he 65. I lost my husband when I was 50 and he was 65. It is very hard being a widow at this young age. So, just a heads up that he is 18 years farther into the future than you are. There will be many "old fashioned ways" about him that just won't compute inside your 28 year old mind. So, if it's just for the sex??? Have fun. If it's serious??? Think seriously before jumping over a generation to get to another.

Answer 4

Its only been a month so sex is always great at the beginning no matter what age that person may be! so that needs more time but does he make sure you comfortable in life,does help clean up dishes? does he call you during the day? doea he send you flowrs and make you feel special? Do you go out and do things on the town together or do you meet somewhere u can be just be intimate? WHAT are you embarrassed about? Questions only you can answer but when you do maybe your answer to these questions will help you figure it out?
Good Luck!

Answer 5

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Answer 7

1. only you can be the judge of that. men at any age would be interested in sex. but i think men his age are more into finding a good companion to spend time with. and maybe he really does find your company to be very compatible with him.

2. you shouldn't care so much about what other ppl might think. the relationship is still young, and if you think this relationship will work out, you'll need to be prepared that ppl might look at your funny. so get used to it.

3. it's only been a month, so maybe it's too soon for your sis to meet him. i mean, as the relationship grows, you two will be more comfortable with one another. so naturally at that time, you will feel more comfortable bringing him to meet your family. i would hold off on him meeting your family. right now, your family might think that the relationship is still in it's early stages and might be more critical of him. and you shouldn't feel ashamed. he's a good man and if he respects you and treats you right, there's no shame in that. and your family will eventually see that side of him too and be happy for you.

Answer 8

You can stop worrying about what other people think because that's the adult thing to do. You can also quit fretting about whether he really cares. If he didn't, he'd be with someone else already. Yes, us older guys do appreciate sex, especially with a woman so much younger than we are. But that's true even when we're in our twenties. It's how the male of our species is built, and if you have issues with that, take 'em up with Mother Nature!
The guy is happy with you and wants you to be happy with him. Chill, fer cryin' out loud, and treasure what y'got!

Answer 9

Hi! I'm 25, and last year I got with somebody who is a different race and also 20 years older than me...fast forward 18 months, and we have a gorgeous 4 month old daughter, and I'm the happiest I've ever been. My family accept him, and his me. Age has never came into it with us, often I completely forget that there is an age gap!

Answer 10

Hi,reading your question,it seems you are the one with the age difference problem IE; you wont let your sister meet him because YOU would be embarrassed ,if you feel like this why are you with him,does he know you feel like this ? i bet he doesn`t or i am sure he would have finished with you by now.O.K maybe he is flattered at being seen with a younger woman but he would be hurt if he knew how you really feel.Do the decent thing and finish with him.