i ve been working everyday no weekend off for the past 2 weeks and didnt sleep last night till 4 in thet morning as i have been coughing all night,i have 3 children ,so i am tired ,and today i have a day off,went to lunch , the waitres was very rude to me when i came,i ask if can have a tea and she said we have more than 1 tea here! and i should say that i m the customer,but it is me i prefer not answering rude people.but i still keep calm and and there was this man,he was learning dissabillity and quite old he started talking.. and talking ,and i asked the waitres if i could sit in the other table,my table is in the corner of that small rest a two sit table just next to him,i felt very crowded(i dont like small space)everyone was looking at me like i was very rude with dissabled people but it wasnt the case i was just wanted to have a lunch in peace and not in too small corner.I know it seems rude ,is a bad thing to do isnt 'it?I feel bad.
2007-11-20 00:46:25 · 17 answers · asked by ddddd75 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Don´t be so hard on yourself.
You´re tired. You didn´t say anything bad to the man , you just wanted some peace. Nothing wrong with that.
2007-11-20 00:54:41 · answer #1 · answered by JOMAMO IS BACK 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Listen. I've worked with people with learning disabilities and mental health problems most of my adult life. In between this it was older people, brain injury or nursing. So that's about 20 years of doing this sort of work. I also have a daughter who has asperger's syndrome and believe me there are plenty of times when I wish she'd be quiet and give me some peace. That doesn't mean I don't love her.
Just because someone has a learning disability doesn't mean you should treat them any differently to anyone else as far as things like manners go.
Be honest with yourself - it wasn't him personally that you were getting away from, it was the nattering on too much when you wanted some peace - so what's wrong with that!
I've spent many years trying to teach learning disabled adults how to behave appropriately in public and it is something they often need to learn to fit into society. Hopefully he will have got the message that nattering on continuously to a stranger is not very effective so you probably did him a favour.
If you moved away just because he was sitting near you, now that would have been rude. I've known people to do this and it's totally uacceptable. But this is not what you did.
Personally I enjoy chatting to most people with learning difficulty, but if I needed some peace, at that moment of time, I might well have just explained this to him, but then some people probably would have thought that rude too.
Just forget about it, you didn't do anything wrong.
2007-11-20 09:49:02 · answer #2 · answered by Cat2007 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're not a bad person. Just because someone has a mental disability doesn't mean you're obligated to sit there and talk to them when they start talking to you. Especially when you want some peace and quiet to yourself. To be perfectly honest, you're a better person than I am because I probably would've ignored him as horrible as that sounds.
Also, if it makes you feel any better, I just realized the other day that I've only taken one personal day all year long. ONE, and that was back in May for my 21st birthday! And I have a full time job, go to school part time, and have my own apartment to keep up! I know that doesn't compare to having kids to take care of, but I wanted to cry when I realized that! My mother and my boyfriend are convinced I'm a workaholic.
But as I said before, please don't think of yourself as a bad person for simply wanting some time to yourself. You're not.
2007-11-20 08:54:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
No You should not feel bad. You are entitled to eat lunch in peace. It seems the waitress was rude. But..... could you not of asked the disabled person to leave you alone. Said you are here for a quiet lunch and would he mind.
2007-11-20 08:53:21 · answer #4 · answered by cuffyn 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, it don't matter how hard you work or how little you work, or even if you do not work at all. If you want to go out for a nice quiet meal, and go to a restaurant and the host puts a near a loud crowd, than it's your right if you wanna move to a quiet table..
Captain, Chris W T
ATP- Lear 45, B747- A318 - A380
CFI
2007-11-20 11:20:54 · answer #5 · answered by CaptainChris 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
we all have bad days and get tired try to take it easy and perhaps don't be so honest say you need some air sit close to the door or your cold if this person was near the door you spoke the truth that's all, but it do not make you a bad person just a tired human being who wanted some time to himself don't beat yourself up. all the best.
2007-11-20 10:11:25 · answer #6 · answered by annie6 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are too sensitive. It's over now, just forget it. I should not let waitresses boss me around and you are entitled to your own peace and quiet without being bothered by anyone, learning disability or not. I think you need to assert yourself and you can do it without being rude, in fact being extremely polite but firm is what is likely to work.
2007-11-20 08:59:59 · answer #7 · answered by Eddie D 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't feel bad, u didn't move because the person was disabled u moved to get away from the noise, if u had moved away from a screaming child wld u have been treated the same, probably not.
2007-11-20 08:53:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It was sleep you needed not lunch. I do not think you would have acted like that normally. If you did you would not be troubled by it now
2007-11-20 15:14:47 · answer #9 · answered by Scouse 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I dont knwo whether it is bad but it is very inpolite. Work less en enjoy life a bit more, it will make you feel better.
2007-11-20 08:50:57 · answer #10 · answered by psychopiet 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋