Well, we are both in dead end jobs until he gets out of school, and after deciding we both want a nice wedding (both of us have expensive taste) and starting to plan the one for 2009 (Which is a ways away) weve decided we will probably wait until 2010. Weve decided since he wont graduate until the end of 2008, and we need to put money down, and save up for everything that we may as well wait a year so we might be able to buy a house too.
Welllllllllllllll..... i'm already pulling my hair out over it, I wan to get married right away (no not a rush type of thing that Im trying to get money or don't want him to leave, im just eager to start our lives together) and 2009 seemed far away, well now it drives me even more nuts.
I figure this gives him time to get settled in his career and I can pick up a second job, or a job that pays me better and we can save gobs of money.
Any tips on how not to get stressed over this and let it take over my life....??
2007-11-19 20:12:49 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Its not just to spend extra time saving, i decided I might as well since itll be a while... He wont get out of school til then and we want to have decent jobs so were not in the big group of people that get divorced because they argue too much about money.
That and we dont want to get married and live with our parents like we did when we were 15, were saying we can take care of ourselves so i think its inappropriate to live with the parents after that..
2007-11-20 15:54:12 · update #1
It's not good to spend so many months saving money just for a lavish wedding event. That's a one-day thing, and no matter how expensive the meal, some of your guests will have been to a fancier reception. For others, it might be the most expensive party they ever attend. How silly for you to spend three years scrimping so they can go to a party they could not afford otherwise.
You need to reorder your priorities completely. When you're married, you'll learn to be happy with mid-price wine if you plan to entertain much at all. Surely you're not going to wait to have people until you can serve them the finest.
2007-11-20 01:29:08 · answer #1 · answered by noname 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know this isn't what you are asking and probably not what you want to hear, but if you two have been together for at least a couple years and know for sure that you want to marry each other, I would recommend marrying sooner.
You have said that you are eager to get married because you are eager to start your lives together. That is an excellent reason to want to get married. If you choose to postpone your wedding because you need to save more money to pay for your expensive taste, it seems you are letting your wedding become more about the party than about the marriage. A wedding is a celebration of a couple's decision to marry. If now is the right time in your relationship to get married, then now is the right time in your life for a wedding (for richer or for poorer). So go ahead and be the nearly broke yet hopelessly in love young husband and wife -- there's something insanely and enviably romantic about that.
Best wishes to you and your fiance!
2007-11-19 20:52:06 · answer #2 · answered by Emmy Jo (13 weeks with #2) 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
2009 is not that far away Hun. Just because you are postponing the wedding does not mean that you can not work on some of the plans. There are a millions things you can do to prepare. Look at dresses, flowers, venues, get ideas working on the small details. Then when your time does come around, you will be sitting pretty because you had plenty of time to plan. Enjoy being engaged and don't worry that your time has been extended. Best of luck!
2007-11-20 02:32:59 · answer #3 · answered by vaya 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
easiest way to solve the problem is get married.
don't wait.
weddings should be about the beginning of a loving marriage. NOT about the grand show and lavish decorations and material.
if you love him, and he loves you - just get married already.
planning a wedding for 2010 is pointless. You'll end up being the engaged-till-us-part couple who are so picky that they never get around to getting married.
You don't need to have $ and a house and a steady job to get married. You only need to love eachother and know that you can work as a loving relationship for the rest of your lives.
There is a strong hint of avoiding the commitment of getting married in what you have written...
2007-11-19 21:47:09 · answer #4 · answered by chilly 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
You just live your own life, and keep dating. Don't shack up, don't buy a house together til after you are married, just keep your lives separate, be independent and see what happens. What you are talking about is a LONG ways away.
2007-11-20 00:47:25 · answer #5 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋