I would reallu like to help my dear friend out, today he mentioned that life is throwing him a lot of financial curveballs & when I asked if he needed help he jokingly asked if I had $1000 just laying around.
I know he wont give me a straight answer if I asked how much he really needs so I thought about stopping by his work "to visit while I'm in town" & handing him a envelope; good or bad idea? Got anything better??
2007-11-19 12:41:25 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
If you want to keep the friend, never lend money.
If you feel he would reject it out of pride, find a different route to get him the money. There are other ways... find a lawyer and get the lawyer to send him the money anonymously... that it came from an anonymous benefactor. Does he belong to a church? Talk to the pastor and ask him if he would give your friend the money... again, from an anonymous benefactor.
Do you actually know some of the bills he faces? Utilities? etc? Contact the "debtors" and see if you can pay the bills directly. Even if they aren't the actual bills that are weighing him down, you can pay the electric company, say, $200 towards his electric bills. One way or another, that will help ease his burden, and he can use the money he did not have to pay on his electric bill for other expenses that are giving him problems.
If your friend actually does accept the money, again, don't expect payment back if you wish to maintain the friendship. One great idea is the "Pay It Forward" concept. Instead of paying YOU BACK the money, just tell him that someday, when HIS finances are good again, that he do a similar "kindness" to someone else who is in need. That relieves the "debt" burden between the two of you, and puts it in a different frame of mind for him for the future.
Have a polite day.
2007-11-19 13:29:05 · answer #1 · answered by wyomugs 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
WOW! are you a most wonderful friend.....The thing is you can't just drop by the work place and drop off an envelope and say well, bye, gotta go.....how about when you come into town, take him out to dinner and when it's time to go, have a taxi ready to pick you up and just before you get in the cab, hand him the envelope and close the door and tell the cab guy to step on it.....that way he won't be as embarrassed and also can't hand it back....Is he lucky to have you for a friend or what.......
2007-11-19 16:43:27 · answer #2 · answered by mj 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, since you have so much money, can I have some?
Just kidding. But between friends, I think a loan is a bad idea. I think you'll be a lot better off if you just give him the money because then there will be no hard feelings about him paying you back or anything. If you think he might not accept it, you can give it to him anonymously.
I think it's very generous of you to try to help your friend. I wish you all the best.
2007-11-19 12:52:09 · answer #3 · answered by drshorty 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I was confronted with this situation not too long ago.
I basically made it sound like it would help ME if they took the money.
Let them know that you know if they had the dough you are confident they would do the same.
If you have to offer it directly more than a couple of times, I would not force it.
Some people are too proud.
2007-11-19 12:45:23 · answer #4 · answered by vhesponage 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him its an interest free loan. Tell him you worry and you don't want him struggling. He will be more apt to accept the money and less likely to be offended because you aren't just throwing money at him. That hurts pride.
2007-11-19 12:45:39 · answer #5 · answered by Robert B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say that he was fair with his estimate already, that a thousand bucks would help him very much.
If you can afford it, maybe12 or 13, (it sounds like he's that type of person to underestimate in such a case.)
And drshorty has a good point indeed.
2007-11-19 12:54:54 · answer #6 · answered by Charles S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's the perfect time of year. Just hand him the money in a Christmas card (sealed in an envelope of course) and say here, we thought you could use this. Merry Christmas!
2007-11-19 12:45:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you really wanta help, I would and when handing it say i didn't have a 1000 laying around but i did find this at my bank..
2007-11-19 12:50:00 · answer #8 · answered by msmomofmany 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to his house and put the envelope in his mail slot or something of that sort.
2007-11-19 12:46:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Give him an early xmas Card and send him it with a check in it. Then its up to him to use it or not.
2007-11-19 13:18:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋