"Not to imply anything, but I don't think the kid weighs forty pounds."
"Y'know, looking at her, you'd never guess that Pamela Lee had a baby!"
"I sure hope your thighs aren't gonna stay that flabby forever!"
"Well, couldn't they induce labor? The 25th is the Super Bowl."
"Damn if you ain't about five pounds away from a surprise visit from that Richard Simmons fella."
"Fred at the office passed a stone the size of a pea. Boy, that's gotta hurt."
"Whoa! For a minute there, I thought I woke up next to Willard Scott!"
"I'm jealous! Why can't men experience the joy of childbirth?"
"Are your ankles supposed to look like that?"
"Get your *own* ice cream, Buddha!"
"Geez, you're awfully puffy looking today."
"Got milk?"
"Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Tawney."
"Man! That rose tattoo on your hip is the size of Madagascar!"
"Retaining water? Yeah, like the Hoover Dam retains water."
"You don't have the guts to pull the trigger, Lardass."
2007-11-19 09:40:20 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
im a mum of three and i posted this because i know they are things you shouldnt say to a pregnant wife.
2007-11-19 10:17:28 · update #1
Nice. Some are funny some aren't.
2007-11-19 09:43:52 · answer #1 · answered by hah107 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I have told you before that yes I was crazy, and it lasted probably until the baby was about a year old. It seemed to be the worst right before and right after the baby was born. I cried the last two weeks I was pregnant (the baby was overdue and I didn't want him to be) and then the first week after (I was scared for my mom to leave me alone with THIS BABY ALL ON MY OWN?!?!?!) Yeah, you are in for quite a ride, especially with twins as your first pregnancy.
2016-05-24 05:57:27 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny
2007-11-19 09:45:01 · answer #3 · answered by OMOTAYO.A. A 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
"Well, couldn't they induce labor? The 25th is the Super Bowl."
That's the only funny one. The rest are just kinda mean.
Of Course I am a girl, so maybe that's why.
2007-11-19 09:44:06 · answer #4 · answered by singersashaw 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Say those to your pregnant wife & I bet she gets the guts to pull the trigger. I'm 8 months pregnant & it makes me cry just when my husband watches anything on tv w/ cute, skinny women.
2007-11-19 09:44:44 · answer #5 · answered by super_mom 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think all pregnant women are beautiful, radiant, and if not special, after all she is about to produce one of your offspring. So leave her alone, she is still the same person now, as when you guys got together.
2007-11-19 10:08:28 · answer #6 · answered by soisitok 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
i had a baby..and think these are very funny...you're brave for posting this lol b.c when i was pregnant alll i did was go on answers to pass the time...haha, and i think if i saw this i wouldve cried
2007-11-19 09:49:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Here's one my hubby actually had the guts to say to me when I was pregnant......
"do you think we need to stop at the truck scales and make sure we're not over the legal limit?"
Yes, we're still married!
2007-11-19 09:44:43 · answer #8 · answered by meltzie 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I am surprised the guy got away with more then 3!!!! Holy crap hat a stupid stupid man!!! LMOA
2007-11-19 16:14:02 · answer #9 · answered by sunshine 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha this is a good one, put up some more and here's a star for u :D!
2007-11-20 06:31:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋