my cat's incontinent and I just can't cope any more..?

Question

my beautiful little cat got run over a year and a half ago, it left her with nerve damage which means she can't control when she wees. I've coped as best i can but it's ruling my life. I'm a student and have had to rent an expensive flat just for me which i can't really afford, instead of living in a shared house (obviously I can't impose her on anyone else) My electricity bills are huge due to the constant washing I have to do, i can't go anywhere for more than a couple of days as I can't get anyone to look after her, it even contributed to the breakup of my engagement as my fiance couldn't deal with living with cat wee.i really love her and feel horribly guilty even thinking about giving her up but i just can't cope any more. i would never give her to one of those rescue centres whre they keep them in cages, but does anyone have any other suggestions? many thanks

If anyone knows of a farm that would take her, where she could maybe sleep in a barn or a shed, that would be ideal. She's a very good hunter, and loves being outdoors.

Answer 1

Its sad to read your post. I would never give up my animals, I would rather put them to sleep them give them to a stranger. I would be too scared of what would happen to them and what would happen after they were given up again. I wouldn't treat your situation any different so read between the lines on my advice.

Edit** I'd take her for you if you lived in MD and put her in my barn.

Answer 2

First, have you tried making a kitty room where she can go without making a crazy mess? I'm thinking maybe a bathroom. Just line the floor with wee wee pads. Buy the cheapo brand and get the big ones. My kitty had the same problem during her last week or two. Actually, she couldn't walk, so we'd have to put her in the litter box.
Secondly, they do make diapers for animals. If you can't find ones for cats, look for ones for dogs, just get a small size. Dogs bleed, so they are needed for female dogs that are having their period.
Third, if your cat can at all control when she goes (which I understand may NOT be the case), you could always try laying her in her box at certain scheduled times throughout the day. At the least, maybe she can go when you put her in there, so there's less of a mess.
Fourth, have you considered getting one of those kitty cages? The ones I am talking about are much bigger than the small metal ones. They vary greatly in price, but you can get pretty nice ones that have three levels. I'm thinking you can make up for her time in the "cage" (hey, some of those are a lot nicer than my apt!) by playing with her when she has the diaper things on.
Fifth, there are rescue organizations that will take in disabled pets, and there are those that are NO KILL shelters. Honestly, if this was my cat, I'd do my darndest to keep her. She knows you, she loves you, she can deal a lot better with you rather than without. Giving her up will only increase her stress. If you MUST give her up, make sure it's an organization that won't euthanize her.
If you live in the NY area at all, I know of two organizations that MAY be able to help you, although I think one only does dogs...
As a last idea, you may want to try calling local animal shelters, not to give them your kitty, but someone may know someone that can help you out...

Answer 3

I really feel for you, a dreadul situation to be in. I have to say putting her to sleep for me would not be an option. I think of my pets like family and I wouldn't put them to sleep because they were incontinent! Cat nappies sounds like a good option - it would be cruel to part with her, she'd be so lost without the person thats' looked after her. Can your Vet not help you with some advice? The farm is good idea too as it wouldn't matter then - are you in the USA or the UK?

Answer 4

As much as you love her and obviously you do, you need to put things in perspective. Your kitty probably hates the wetting as much as you and your fiance did. It goes against a kitty's dignity to wet the floor when they are litter trained. I would talk to rescue and if they can't offer any hope then you may need to consider putting her down as you cannot continue racking up more bills when you are a student and need to concentrate on your education! Good luck and whatever you decide you will do what is right by the animal.

Answer 5

Have you tried the stud pants? They're used on cats who can't control when they wet or spray.

I suggest first going over to the yahoogroups list called Handicats, this is a list made up of owners with handicapped cats, they'll be able to offer you workable suggestions. Possibly things you haven't even considered yet. It sure can't hurt.

Thanks for taking pet ownership so seriously.

Answer 6

Sometimes you have no choice but to choose to put the animal down. It's a fact of life that you need money to continue treatments and very, very few people will take on a cat with that problem. I'm so sorry that you are in this situation, but I think you've done your best to try to keep things going.

Answer 7

have you taken her to the vet? her kidneys may have been damaged. I had a cat like this once ans it lived for many years on pills. As you are a bit short of the readies perhaps you could go to the PDSA who only take a nominal charge
GOOD LUCK

Answer 8

im sorry but the options I see are live with it, give her up to one of those places, put her to sleep or make her an outdoor cat.
I wouldnt want to put her to sleep since she cant control it and it seems like being outdoors is dangerous
i hope you make the right choice for you


yea maybe those diapers would work?

Answer 9

Could you try and ask at rescue centre, may be they can help you with advice or find a suitable home for her.
What does vet say about your kittie's problem?

Answer 10

bless her little heart, and you obviously love her so much. I know it may sound stupid but you can use tiny nappies, just cut a hole for the tail. this has been done many times before and is successful. she will get used to it, not ideal i know, but it would ease your stress, and its not cruel, believe me it works x