Have you been disgusted by someone you thought you loved??

Question

For a long time I cared for this guy, but recently after "making love" with him I felt disgusted. Even in the middle of performing I gagged!! I knew my feelings for him were slowly fading, but didn't realize how much I must dislike him now. I am now concerned that because of him it will take me some time to want to be with someone physically again. Has this ever happened to you? Do I need theraphy now??? I feel confused!!

I did know him quite well .....more than 4 years

Answer 1

That happened to me with my ex...we were together for a year and we were friends after, but i loved him so much at the beginning and then about 6 months + i started to slowly lose my feelings and yes i would gag when we did it. You need to end it now..dont drag it out like i did, or you will still be getting texts and calls after you've been broke up for 2 1/2 years!!!!! I promise you it wont get better, it never does once you start to lose those feelings, i know from experience and more than one relationship, it SUX! Good luck tho!

Answer 2

You can love someone and still be repulsed by something they might ask you to do or something they might do or say. Sexual acts, especially oral, should be taken slowly and with careful consideration to all parties involved. Don't continue to do something you don't care to do. You'll only end up being resentful. Compromise is not always the easiest thing to accomplish, but it's highly necessary in a healthy relationship.
However, perhaps you were never really in love with this person. Little annoyances are going to happen in a relationship no matter how much you love someone, but to be totally repulsed is not generally what happens.
You probably don't need therapy unless you continue to dwell on the issue. Just give the whole situation time to heal in your mind.
Without knowing more about your situation it's really hard to say too much more.

Answer 3

I dont know what kind of person you are so i dont know if you need therapy or not. What I do know is that sex is diffrent with each person. Just because this one guy made you feel disgusting during sex does not mean the same for every other male in the world. You need to accept the fact that you just had a bad experience. The best idea would be to not rush into anything, and to not have sex with someone until its truly right.

Answer 4

I think it would be a good idea for you to have a chat with someone you know and trust, preferably a professional someone like your doctor.

Usually woman to woman are good on these things. Not saying men aren't some are very expert.

I would certainly say be careful because as you say you only thought that you loved him, and just someone you cared for is not a lot to go on for such intimacy.

But don't continue to be confused talk to someone nice and understanding. Hope you get some good answers to your question (Yahoo Answers) that you will find helpful.

In my opinion it is best to get to know someone well firstly. Someone you know that you have things in common with, and if you find you are in love with each other, then you could consider your future together.

But of course you need to find peace of mind first, after your bad experience.

Answer 5

I have been disgusted plenty of times by people that I not only thought I loved but people I still love. Sometimes things happen and you just cant seem to get past them.. My husband dropped my declawed cat off on some back road, and told me he took him back to the humane society. I was so repulsed by what he did, that I had a hard time getting past. But I did.
If you seriously dont like this person, just dont be with him, you arent married you havent made any vows to him or before god, so break it off clean, and move on.
If you are still repulsed by him even if he isnt in your life anymore I would suggest some counceling because it isnt normal to be that hung up on something that isnt still in your life, unless he has done something horrendous like kill someone.

Answer 6

Well I don't like to answer a question witha question, but did he do something that has made you not want him anymore? like cheated on you? Does he have poor hygeine? Maybe its his personality or the way he treats you when "making love" Maybe its just not intamate enough for you and you want something better in a relationship. Sometimes feeling change after awhile. It sad to say but it happens. If your not happy though maybe its time to move on. Relationships are supposed to be enjoyed not forced. If its forced then you just stress out and can affect you in other ways Good luck Hun.

Answer 7

I think some more details are going to be needed for this. Do you find him physically unattractive? Does he really suck in bed? Are you recently broken up with someone else (in the last several months)? If the last one is the case, then it's probably that you're not really over your ex yet, and you're going to need to take plenty of time to get over him. Whatever it is, I doubt you need therapy, unless you react this way with nearly every guy you have sex with.

Answer 8

i think that everyone has or will go thru this...it's mostly just the act and the pedestal you put this guy on...the acting of "making love" can greatly change the way you look at someone especially if you expected more from the experience...you dont need therapy sweetheart lol it's just a learning process to not expect so much from someone but just take it on step at a time and also to not put things on the "pedestal" good luck!!

Answer 9

When you find the rite person to be with you'll know. I thought I loved someone to, he was a really great, sweet guy. Always said nice things than one day i thought it was the day for me and him to you know, and well when i didnt want it, he did. He raped me and i was sooo disgusted about it i never told anyone. It toke me a lil while to trust another man again but im happily engaged for 2 years and i couldnt be happier. You'll find someone that you cant let go. Good-Luck!

Answer 10

The secret is that you need to wait until your married to have sex. Because having sex before marriage is wrong, it will alwalys come with feelings of being dirty, men who have sex before marriage have no respect for wemon, wemen who let guys have sex before marriage have not respect for themselves. You body is sacred, the scriptures in the bible say that your body is a temple and whosoever defiles a temple god will destroy. When your dating, before your married, make a guy get to know you before he even is allowed to touch you, than when he's allowed to touch you, make him keep his hands away from your pirvite areas, than dont let him touch you further until you have gotten to know him, than when he has become your best friend on earth, than you marry him, than you have sex, Than your feelings for the guy will be pure and clean. And you will enjoy the beauty of the relationship forever. And if you are faithful, it will lead to eternal life and true happiness at some point. Cause you will have done it right. Using god's true plan of happiness, for surely the scriptures say Wickedness never was happiness.