Whats a good polite name you can call women you don't know?

Question

I was out doing a bit of shoping earlier today and as i was leaving one shop i could see a women on the other side about to enter. I opened the door, steped to the side and said "after you love". She walked past and gave me a really dirty look as if i had just insulted her then didn't even say thank you, the cow. I then remembered that when i've called other women name's like love, darling, babe i've often had the same look. So what's a good name to call women you don't know, where they won't feel your being sexist, slimey or rude ?

Answer 1

Pft. Nothing wrong with sayin love or honey or sweets...if you have the charisma to pull it off! And its done in a very polite way. What would you have said to a man if you stepped to the side for him? My point is, you dont actually have to call a woman (or anyone) you dont know anything! Just a smile would have been enough or an 'after you'.
Saying all of that, its nice to know that there are still some men like you in the world! Chivalrous and polite! :)

Answer 2

I'm afraid there's really nothing you can use that at least one person won't consider an insult. There's Ma'am and Miss, which is pretty basic, but many women find Ma'am to be an insult to them because they assume people think they look old. Say Miss to a married woman and they'll be insulted there to because their marriage isn't being respected.

Personally, it doesn't bother me one bit when I'm called a pet name by a total stranger. If I had been the woman in your scenario, I would have smiled, said thank you and walked on through (returning the favor if there happened to be double doors, by the way).

Answer 3

As a northerner I often use "love" without thinking. If you really want to say the right thing call her Ma'am (Marm) after all that is the proper way of addresing title for a female District Judge and The Queen. The beauty is you can actually use a very sarcastic tone in the same way as a man can be called Sir in a manner that shows you mean something else

Answer 4

I would be more offended being called "ma'am" than I would be if you called me "love". Sure, calling someone "love" is a term of endearment, but I would just take that as a friendly gesture. On the other hand, calling me "Babe"...not so much. That is something that drunk guys in the bar say if they are trying to get your attention.

Regardless, I would have said thank you for opening the door for me.

Answer 5

Honey, <-- see I do it too! :-)

This is a world full of up tightness! Someone always has a problem. So, just do what you do and let the people that like it smile at you and say thanks! And the ones that don't get over it. Be loving and gentle to everyone. I am going to assume that you aren't from the States, becuase rarely do we use the term "cow" or "love". I am a bit southern so I say Darlin' to just about everyone. or Hon. But that gets old. So, I might try love :-) With a terrible accent! haha

Thanks for the smile! :-)

Answer 6

Hm, I suppose that's a cultural thing. I often get complete strangers of both genders calling me 'love', and it's just being friendly, there's nothing insulting meant by it here in Ireland. Although I think 'babe' might be taken differently ...

I suppose you could say 'Ma'am' or 'Missus' or something like that.

Answer 7

Sorry to say this, but i would feel very insulted if a guy I did or did not know refered to me as, love, or babe. Those are terms in street slang that mean prostitute. The proper thing to say is 'Ma'am, or Miss. Then, instead of dirty looks, you get the most brilliant smiles. I love to be refered to as, 'Miss.' It shows that you respect the lady, and nothing is better than that!

Hope this helps!

Answer 8

Just open the door and step to one side smiling. No need to say anything.
I once had a rollicking tirade when I offered my seat on the underground without me saying anything.
Remember not everyone considers courtesy to be one of the pleasures of life. The prats like the one in my tale was one of them

Answer 9

haha i use love all the time, but i can get away with it b/c i'm a girl. i think miss/ ma'am. or best bet just leave the 'name' out because if you're already being polite by opening the door for them.. that's good enough, actions speak louder than words.. until you begin to be creepy.

Answer 10

"Miss" or "Ma'am" for an older woman.

Never call a woman you don't know "babe." She will assume you are hitting on her. You also should avoid "love" or "darling" because those words should be reserved for someone who you are in a relationship with.