I just started dating an ex of mine, he is an ex because he cheated on me. Anyway, we go out on the weekends and I see guys that I know and I will leave him sitting there and go talk to my guy friends. I just do it to make him jealous and it works. It makes him really really mad and this past weekend when we went to a bar where we live close to I saw a guy friend and went and talked him for like 45 mins. and my guy went up to the bar, even though he was the one who was suppose to drive home and started takin a bunch of shots and got a little tipsy. He was very upset. Do you think it is ok to do this to him. I mean, I really do love him and want to be with him more than anything but should I really be doing this on purpose?? Why is he getting mad after what he did to me??
2007-11-19 06:19:35 · 17 answers · asked by Floridagirl 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Because you are spending so much time trying to make him jealous means that you have not forgiven him for what he has done. You are deliberately trying to hurt him. Your decision to date him again was made with the FULL knowledge and understanding of his past behavior. To hold that (old) behavior against him in this (new) relationship is not fair. The fact that you have to ask the question "Do you think it is OK to do this to him" says that on some level, you know you're wrong. Yes, he does have a right to be mad...you're being vengeful! You may want to be with him and you may care about him a lot, but your love is questionable. Love is many things...but what it is NOT is vindictive.
2007-11-19 07:01:44 · answer #1 · answered by ImJustSayin 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
After he cheated on you, it severely destroyed your trust in him, and now it seems as though you are doing the same to him. Remember the old saying, "two wrongs don't make a right?" Well this stands true in this case. The relationship is already weak because of what he did to you, and you are only making it weaker. Instead, show him your devotion and be the bigger person. You don't have act as though he is the only person in the world, and it's OK to have a friendly chat with a friend once in a while, but you did come to the bar with your BOYFRIEND, so don't just abandon him there.
Counseling definitely helps in these types of relationships to help build trust and confidence in your relationship. Good luck!
2007-11-19 06:25:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Woah...this is a very unhealthy relationship! If he cheated on you, and now you seem to be getting revenge by purposely making him jealous, one or both of you will end up extremely hurt in the end. If you really feel you need to do this because of something that happened in the past, you obviously have some trust issues and you should both consider moving on and finding other people.
2007-11-19 06:23:29 · answer #3 · answered by lafemelle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you both need to grow up. If you got back together with him after he cheated, YOU SHOULD HAVE FORGAVE him.....sounds like you haven't yet. Grow up and if he is your boyfriend-stop leaving him for 45 min at a time to go talk to some other guy. Sounds like you are upsetting him and although he did F*** up in the first place-maybe he truly is trying to change and is sorry for making that mistake. If you love him-stop being a childish B**** and be with him-forgive him. If you can't forgive him yet-then let him move on and let yourself move on.
2007-11-19 06:26:13 · answer #4 · answered by Jackie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all I know from experience that once a cheater always a cheater, but aside from that fact if you took him back it was because you forgave and forget, not because you want to get even. If you keep going the same way you are your actions are going to lead him to cheating on you again and ya'll breaking up. So really think about if you truly want to be with him or not.
2007-11-19 07:40:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would seriously stop the head games. I did this with a guy I really liked and.. well our relationship ending. Think about if the guy did this to you? Would you be upset? I bet it would. You might even break up with him. I would. He is getting mad because he most likely likes you a lot and possible loves you.
2007-11-19 06:29:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He regrets it. If you really love him i doubt you would be hurting him this much, i know it hurt you at the time, but continously is a little over the line, dontchya think? Well, whats done is done, are you feeling guilty or something? lol sounds like it, but if your looking for straight answer, yes, i think its very wrong to do that to a guy or anyone for that matter, two wrongs dont make a left, or a right.
2007-11-19 06:24:42 · answer #7 · answered by Dann (: 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love him and want to be with him, then you should be telling him that instead of playing head games with him or trying to get even. You both need to be open and honest with each other about what you want and to talk things through when you've been hurt, or things are never going to work out.
2007-11-19 06:24:29 · answer #8 · answered by MM 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you should be doing it. Your relationship should be built on mutual respect. Obviously he does't respect you , because he cheated and you obviously don't respect him. To purposely make him jealous is immature in my opinion. Find a man that you don't need to play games with and can get to know and try and build a future.
2007-11-19 06:32:02 · answer #9 · answered by the coast with the most 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you going out with him again if he cheated on you once? Also you shouldnt be flirting with other men when you are supposed to be going out with your bf. I understand why he is mad.
2007-11-19 06:28:30 · answer #10 · answered by Beach Babe 08 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋