What to do until I move out?

Question

Hi guys, I wanted to get some peoples' opinion on my situation.

My roommate is a huuuuge jerk. She is loud, talks about me to the other roommates in the living room so I can hear, craves attention, talks about how she kicked down her old roomates' door because she didn't like her and stole her stuff, has ridiculous fights with her boyfriend, slams doors when she knows I'm sleeping, and is generally disrespectful. I have always treated her and the other girls with total respect (cleaning the apartment weekly, taking out trash, doing dishes) and am barely in the apartment, so its not like I have DONE anything to her. I can't get any of my work done (I'm a double major) and so I am subletting my room to someone else because I can't stand her anymore.

My questions: when should I tell the other roommates that I am moving out? How should I treat the jerk roommate from now on, now that I AM leaving? So many of the things I did around the apartment I did out of respect to her.

In addition, just this morning she tried to scare me! I got up at my usual time (8) and started to get ready for the day, trying to be as quiet as possible because even though I don't like her, I'm not gonna be rude. Well, as I was walking back into my room after eating breakfast in the kitchen I see her door swing slightly open, and all I can see is darkness but it's clear that I woke her up, or she woke herself up...regardless, the beast was awake! I ALMOST burst out laughing because it was like a troll coming out of her cave! So I went back into my room to put on clothes and I hear her turn the shower on. So, whatever. At least she's getting stuff done, right? I leave my room, lock the door, brush my teeth, and begin to head out. I close the partition door (between our bedrooms and the living room) and as soon as I do, I hear her bedroom door open and slam. I move to the front door where as I am closing it behind me, I hear her angrily open the partition. I locked the door and left.

I have already found someone to sublet the room. =)

Also, the way the housing is set up is it is all student housing with individual leases, and I have already talked to the manager and once I sublet, I will no longer be responsible for the lease.

Answer 1

Here's the thing. You are right to move and not only is her behavior out of line, you are beginning to obsess over it. I know how you feel. I have a coworker like that. Time to go.

Have you sublet the room yet? It doesn't sound like it. Since the new roommate will affect everyone you leave behind, you should probably let everyone know (in a neutral setting, like at dinner or while everyone sits around the TV). If need be, make up an excuse about why you are leaving (found a place closer to your work/classes, found a place that's more affordable).

Then no one is surprised....except maybe the jerk. And if it all works out, she should back off.

Good luck. Make certain you have someplace to move into (before you make that announcement) as well.

Answer 2

Check your lease. #1 Be sure you can sublet. #2 Be sure you inform anyone who has to know - the landlord or who you pay your rent to. Be sure they know you want to keep your moving a secret.

Then if all is well - I would get a few people to help you - and pack up all at once and go. Don't say a word until your packers are there to help.

You do know that if your subletter is as unhappy as you are they will just move out and you will be responsible for the rent again?

Be sure someone knows why you are moving out and perhaps you can break your portion of the lease. I would start working on that as soon as you are out. If the other person likes it - they can become the renter.

Answer 3

Dont tell anyone until last minute so nothing is held on you and you dont have to deal with hearing anything from them until your ready to go. Talk about an immature jerk that girl is. You would think if she moved out of mommy and daddys home she would have grown up a little.

Answer 4

You are going to have to tell them. "I am a double major. It is too noisy in this house and I am not getting my work done so I am going to move. I have found another room mate to take my place and will be leaving on such and such date." You could even text them.
How do you know the other roomates can't stand noisy girl too, and would welcome the opportunity to get rid of her? If they see you are serious this might be the catalyst to call a house meeting and get rid of HER!

Answer 5

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Answer 6

Your situation is untenable. You are right to put distance between you and this bully--which is what she is. Moving will improve your situation and is a good decision.