what can i do? any advice from any walk of life please?

Question

i have really got to the end of my tether, every person in my life has let my down some how or lied to me. i am not just talking about boyfriends, but friends, family, every1. i can sit and think for hours on end , trying to remember 1 person who has never disappointed me and i still cannot. i am thinking of trying to change my personality because it seems that everything good things happens to bad people, and cannot take getting hurt anymore. ANY words of wisdom will be welcomed with open arms.

Answer 1

You sound like a very sensitive person who expects people to treat you how you treat them. Dont change yourself there are a lot of kind, gentle people who are trustworthy out there and I am sure you will find them soon. We all fall short sometimes but try to look for the best in everyone and I am sure you will find some good qualities are surpringly there.

Answer 2

I understand how you feel with this. My family has lied and betrayed me in ways I wouldn't even speak of. It seems that many friends I make betray me as well. I keep thinking sometimes that there's something wrong with me. I know its hard, but there really is NOTHING wrong with you. You are a good person and you deserve so much better. Often what I do is I keep thinking, it won't always be this way. It comforts me to know that I will find someone who is true to me and themselves. Also with current friends, I know that people make mistakes. I have made my own mistakes and disappointed friends as well. We are human. Depending on what it is that the friend or family member has done, I try to forgive them. Most of all, I remember that the only person left in this world that I can count on NOT to disappoint me....is me. And I am my own best friend because of that realization. I count on myself when I need support. I know I will alwats be there for myself. Be your own best friend. Know that you are not a bad person and you don't have to conform or change for others. Thinking about these things is difficult, but recognizing the various other perspectives is important to moving away from that negativity and feeling good about yourself. This is YOUR life, hun, not theirs. Be compassionate towards yourself. And remember that even though bad things happen to good people, it WILL turn around.

Blessings to you.

Answer 3

Firstly- don't sit and think for hours! A little self reflection is good and makes up become deeper as a person, but dwelling in bad thoughts often leaves us feeling tired and depressed.
I'd recommend councelling altough most people dislike the idea of it.
If the people around you have truly let you down- make some new friends! There are good people out here- go and find them!
But remember- we all let someone down occasionally. Look to yourself, honestly and objectively and think- have you even let someone down? Unless your a saint the answer is probably 'yes'. It happens! It doesn't make you, or them bad people. So try not to be too harsh in your judgements- don't be naive but do try to give your friends and family a second chance.
Good luck

Answer 4

start by believing in yourself, the worse thing that could happen to you is if you start disappointing yourself
stop worrying about the selfish people who have let you down and stop thinking about changing yourself because that will end in more heartache
start by being happy for what you have got it might not seem like you have anything to be happy about but write a list of the things that are good in your life (health kids home etc) then write a letter to every person that you believe has wronged and disappointed you put down everything that they have done to hurt you then burn the letters you have no reason to feel let down by these people just feel sorry for them for all the good things they are missing out on by not being in your life
be positive love life and be strong
if you need to chat just get in touch
good luck

Answer 5

You've got a very cynical view of life. You need to change your attitude and stop dwelling on people who have let you down. Get out into the world and start relying on other people or blaming them for everything bad that has happened to you. Perhaps if you had a more positive attitude people would respond to you more positively. Put a smile on your face and perhaps go and help someone less fortunate than you. What goes around comes around.

Answer 6

Maybe you should change the way you relate with people. Try to find out what you do wrong and correct it. Sometimes you have to know a person a little more before trusting him. Also dont expert too much from people, maybe thats why you feel disappointed in them. forgive those you feel disappointed or lied to you. starts all over again, Dont let out too much when it is not necessary.Stay cool. and control your emotions.

Answer 7

Every single person in your life will disappoint you at some time or another if you hang around them long enough but vise versa I am sure you have let some people down to that is normal the tirck is to forgive yes you will never forget it but you can forgive and move on. Let disappointments make you a stronger person learn for them.

Now you know what it feels like to have someone you care about lie to you so maybe now you will think twice before you tell a lie. Now you know how it feels to be let down by someone you care about now you will be more of aware of how others feel around you.

Let these things be tools in your life to enlighten you. Never stoop to a lower levels things you hate in other people. Rise above it you need to keep your self respect to be a better person.

We all have made mistakes I bet if you sat and thought about it you could think of lots of mistakes you have made as well and you wanted forgiveness and mercy do be generous with your forgiveness and mercy.

I bet if you sat and thought about it for hours there are people in your life that you love dearly friends that you are so happy they are part of your life. Guess what there are going to be many more wonderful people who will walk in and out of your life that you are not going to want to miss and sure they are going to be lots more disappointments but there are going to be happy joyful moments to.

Think on it like this how would you know when you are on a mountain taking it all in if you have never been to the valley of disappointment? Say a prayer for strength and move on life is waiting for you.

Answer 8

To be honest no one is likely to Never let you down in some way, theyre only human and you can't keep everyone up on a pedestal..
The way i avoid dissapointment is a little extreme, i never expect ANYTHING from anyone, and that way they can only surprise me in a good way..
I'm not saying you should do that, but maybe dont expect as much from everyone..
If you feel like the world is against you, talk to people about it.. I find talking to people is the best solution..

Answer 9

Everyone gets disappointed by everyone in their life at one point at another. specially family. I mean, think about it. they're around you the most, they're gonna disappoint you more.... Think of the good things they do for you.
I mean, i could sit here and think about bad things my bf does to me....or how its disappointing to be with him...but i dont..i remember his smile, touch, how he looks when he's excited....dont let little things get in the way of whats really important. people are human, there's always going to be disappointment, but there's always gonna be good things too. look at the good things. and more importantly, change your outlook. you seem like youre your own problem... you're upset, yea, because you're sitting here thinking about bad things. if i sat here and thought about bad things, i'd be upset too, but i'm not. i'm not saying to lock these things up, but have a good cry over it, get passed it..and move on with your life.

Answer 10

im like you. i have friends and family who have turned their backs on me. i have tried to take my own life 5 times. i ended up in a mental hospital because of this. dont turn out this way. im happy im still here. i still have the same problems and issues but i count what blessings i do have and believe me you will too..if you take time to sit down and focus on them rather than all the bad things in your life. liefe is about being hurt. but get back up and keep getting back up. lifes a struggle and noone ever siad it was gonna be easy but there will and are many more people like you and me and even worse. feel pity for the worse off. have you a roof over your head?food in your belly?etc??? If you do then you are more fortunate than a lot of others. please count your blessings. I do and thats what puls me through.
Take care and God Bless XXXX