How do I say no to my future daughter-in-law when she asks to borrow my car. .?

Question

My future daughter in law is manipulative. She caught me off guard, and I loaned her my car for two days. Although she was to drive the car only to take her daughter to school and to dance lessons, she put 175 miles on my car. How do I refuse future requests without seeming like a "meanie"???

Answer 1

Like this. "No".

You don't have to explain, you don't have to give a reason. You just say no.

If you explain or give a reason, it's an invitation to her, to "refute" your reason. So don't do that.

Answer 2

Try and lose the guilt. Sometimes the reason why people get in a situation where they are overburdened with work is that they actually feel guilty if they even think about saying no to a request.

Avoid a culture of consensus. Often we agree with things to make (or keep) people happy and on our side. Unfortunately this isn’t always beneficial.

Make no mean NO! Don’t quibble. When you say no, mean it. Stick to your guns and put the request out of your mind. Don’t feel bad about it.

Answer 3

A simple "I'm sorry but I don't loan my car out" shhould suffice. Her being manipulative has no bearing on you saying no. If it does, you become an "enabler". As Ann Landers says "No one can take advantage of you unless you allow them to". Your insurance may not cover her either. Check and tell her that reason.

Answer 4

A firm NO is working wonders some times, or speak to your son to explain to his future wife not to ask you for your car......

Answer 5

Did she at least put in gas?

If you don't want her driving it, just say no. If she is a nice person she will understand.

Answer 6

Tell her that you need to use the car later to do something also.

Answer 7

just say NO.