Okay, not very appropriate...but need an answer--- about giving head within a relationship...?

Question

so my boyfreind and i have a great relationship... very in love.... great chemistry he is very caring... we basically haver our future mapped out and everything.

Our physical aspect of our relationship is just as great... great connecting sex and everything but he would always tell me his first serious girlfriend he was with for a few years was amazing at giving head....
Well i mean i do it, and i am not bad or anything but i am not crazy about it cuz i always feel like i am being compared.....?

I think a part of me resists because i dont like the thought of her coming in to his mind about hooking up... she is at the same college as us and is actually in some of his classes (they were high school sweethearts)

He says i am the best sex he ever had... but my head could use work.... I wanna work at it but i always get like anxiety problems because i dont want her to come back into his mind.... um help?

Answer 1

if it makes you too uncomfortable you could always buy a toy and practice by yourself first :)

Then maybe get one of those books with position of the day or something. Maybe if you explore 'other' new things together you won't have the anxiety problem and he will be focused on something else and you can still have fun together.

Also, remember if you have a great relationship, (1) you should never be insecure and compare yourself to another chic, whether it is a female acquaintance or girlfriend and (2) you should feel comfortable with him talking about anything, physical, social, emotional or spiritual. And (3) it is great you have everything planned out and everything, but apart you must be strong and independent. Continue to focus on yourself and trying to improve upon your weaknesses, not only to please him but also to help yourself continue growing. One thing is certain, ALL relationships (personal, professional and otherwise) will come to an end whether by our choice or that of a higher power. It is important that you are independent as much as you are codependent. Whatever you do in your relationship don't lose the I in We.

Good Luck.

Answer 2

For others who haven't gone as far as you have: This is the problem with entering into physical relationships with people before you're ready to commit to them in marriage. Your boyfriend is "damaged" for you because you'll never be able to shake the idea that he is comparing you to someone else. He can tell you he's not, but he can't avoid making the comparison. Sure it may be positive today, but what else has he done with how many other girls? And what else is going to come up in the future?

How about you? Any ghosts in your closet? These kinds of things are more damaging to the male ego than to the female, and you're already seeing what it does to you.

So the lesson is, it's too late for you. But kids, keep it in your pants until you're ready to commit to a life-long relationship. The psychological stress of multiple partners can kill what could otherwise be a great relationship.

Answer 3

First of all, tell him you don't want to hear anymore about his ex giving him head. I mean it's okay to talk about past sex lives if you're both okay with it but comparing you to her, I just feel is very inappropriate. You seriously need to set him straight on that. And tell him he needs to make it up to you before he get's a big surprise. Then once he has sufficiently compensated for his mistake, cover his manhood with whipped cream and give him the best b!ow j0b he's ever had. Don't forget to keep licking that spot under the head, and don't neglect the balls, and oh, that little spot of skin between the balls and @ss...that's a sensitive area. Just go crazy. I know this is very explicit but if it helps you to make him forget her once and for all then I am glad I could help. ;)

Answer 4

First of all, I would tell him that I don't appreciate him talking about how good his ex girlfriend was at anything. That will solve a lot of things. Tell him the truth; that you don't want him to be thinking about her when you are performing and that's why it makes you hesitant. If you feel like you are being compared, you are going to have a lot of anxiety about it. Then he needs to tell you what he likes and give you tips cuz it's different for every guy. Also, he needs to be willing to try new things that please you.

Answer 5

damn...
i have heard of this before with someone i was dating. wow...damn...yeah, uhm. Look. If the sex is great for both of you, and you want pointers. ASK HIM. Because no matter what anyone else says unless they are giving you technique. Only he knows what turns him on, and what he likes. Some guys find that hot & wild for girl to actually be interested in doing something the way they want it, because she wants to please. Go for it. Have fun. Be all you can be. Practice on him makes perfect, and let him know, you would like to practice, (so he will only think of you, and not his EX, and tell him that that is a major turn off. comparing head of that of an EX, to present girl.) he'll have no choice but to assoicate head with your face, because it'll be there alot.

Answer 6

Okay first you need to take a breathe... and try to calm down because you seem extremely uptight right now. If your nervous that your boyfriend might go back with his ex over the fact that she gives better head then maybe he's not the type of guy you want to be with. But personally it sounds like he really likes you and that your just letting your nevous get the best of you. It's natural to be jealous and worried about your boyfriend exs... I'm always like that with all my boyfriends too... because their people that your boyfriend once cared about... but you can't let them ruin you and him. Don't think about head, like you can't be doing it, thinking omg if I'm awful he's gonna go back to his ex because your just gonna make yourself more nervous. Do it take a deep breathe. And don't over think it. Try different things. Try using flavor things on it? So it taste better for you. Try deep thoarting the whole thing. Another thing that a guy I use to go with liked was when I humed while it was in my mouth. Just remember the head is the most senstive part of it... so it drives them crazyest when you play with that. Best of luck to you! Things will be okay don't worry! =]

Answer 7

Share with him your anxiety and then tell him it is up to him to help you if he wants it to be better. Let him know that you need to feel good about what your doing and he needs to be open about what he likes and doesn't like. Then if you want to do this, have a time where you two just experiment and have an agreement before you start that he has to help make suggestions and tell you what is working for him.

Answer 8

Cirque I would like to add to your request and maybe explain a bit. I do not want to be educated either, other than in someone's opinion that is well thought out. It is no different from not wanting to be preached to that so many of the atheists say irritates them. How we answer these questions tells a lot about the kind of people we are. So, if you want to be taken seriously and be respected then you have to present yourself that way. listening

Answer 9

Ask him what it was that made the head she gave that great, and give your head a signature move. Do some research about how to give great head, maybe use some chocolate syrup to make it more fun and enjoyable for you and he'll pick it up. Men like it, when they know you are enjoying it, make sounds of hmmm...how delicious this is. Believe me, he'll love it!

Answer 10

First of all you should tell your bf shove it....really though or atleast tell him what a jerk he is comparing you to his ex. how can he expect you to want to do it if he is being a jerk about it?
tell him you might be more open to the idea if he went about giving you tips in a nicer way.
if he decides to be nice about it just ask him what he wants. what feels good. does he like this or that.
if everything else is good then he can help you get better at it if you two communicate. thats all it really takes.