Some people say that the woman is supposed to say she will love, honor and OBEY her husband, while the husband does not make such a promise. Some people say this was done at one time, but no longer the case. Some people say its still done, or does it depend on the church? Can someone clear this up for me?
2007-11-18 01:22:25 · 11 answers · asked by Shutterbug 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
When getting married in a Catholic Church the parish should give you a booklet in which you pick the readings, prayer of the faithful, vows and exchange of rings.
So you can choose the vows you want and it does not need to include the word obey. Since brides and grooms choose their own vows we probably do not hear the word obey as much anymore. At one time the priest would choose teh vows and that is probably when it was used more often.
http://www.weddingclipart.com/guide/wedding-vows/Catholic-Wedding-Vows.html
2007-11-18 14:09:22 · answer #1 · answered by Reba 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
3rd wedding? 6 months? Is your sister related to J-Lo? I can offer my personal opinion, but that herein lays the problem. This is ultimately about her choice, and she will do what she wishes. Perhaps she is more in love with the *idea* of weddings and the attention rather than seriously wanting to marry her partners? If so, this is a serious psychological issue that needs professional help. However, I am not going to pick on the bride, since I have no knowledge as to why her marriages failed. Perhaps it had nothing to do with her. I agree that perhaps it is her fiance who wants the wedding. Or maybe she really thinks there is no other "proper" way to get married. While it is true that some guests may be upset that they are expected to travel yet again and buy a wedding gift for yet ANOTHER wedding, some undoubtedly will want to go support her no matter what. Let her have her wedding, and leave it up to the guests to decide what they will do. Some will come and bring gifts happily, some will not come period. If she sees that most of her guests are not coming, she may even scale the wedding down herself. Who knows? The 3rd time's the charm, right? ;) P.S. I will also say that the divorce rates get higher and higher for each marriage after the first. She has a VERY high chance of getting divorced AGAIN simply based on stats. Perhaps she, like many others, needs to figure out the reasons why her marriages failed before jumping in headfirst into another relationship. It sounds like she should be more focused on her marriage than the wedding itself.
2016-05-24 01:59:58 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are given a choice. I know I want to say Love, Honor, and Obey. I have been to Catholic weddings where they didn't say that but something along those lines.
Obeying isn't about being below your husband by the way, it has a much deeper meaning that that. Basically the idea comes from scripture, where women "obey" or are "submissive" to their husbands and their husbands treat them like Jesus treats the church.... so basically better than anything else possible. That isn't to say your husband comes before God... the most important commandment is too love God with all of yourself. And if your husband treats you like Jesus treats the church, he isn't going to ask sometime of you that you shouldn't obey lol. I guess that is why i want to include obey in my vows, although I have heard it is more protestant than catholic to do so.
2007-11-18 10:09:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been to a few Catholic weddings and have not ever heard the word "obey." Personally, I think it must be protestant thing, because in a Catholic marriage, the couple are equals and equally responsible for helping each other become saints.
2007-11-18 02:02:22 · answer #4 · answered by sparki777 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love Honor And Obey
2016-11-04 09:28:24 · answer #5 · answered by wheeington 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi. No, this is not used. It has been replaced wtih "love, honor and CHERISH." Speak with your priest, but I don't remember hearing "obey." I was married in the Catholic Church 30 years ago, and I KNOW that I did not say "obey!!"
2007-11-18 01:47:27 · answer #6 · answered by iloveweddings 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
For our Catholic wedding we both used "love, honor and cherish". It might depend on the church but you always get to speak to priest weeks before your wedding. During this time you discuss what you would like or wouldn't like. Hope that helps.
2007-11-18 01:33:40 · answer #7 · answered by mysteryperson 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I asked about this and was told that my priest has cut out this whole line completely. It depends on the parish, but I assume this is hardly ever used anymore. Make sure to ask BEFORE the wedding.
2007-11-18 15:45:32 · answer #8 · answered by reginachick22 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have not heard it in any of the Catholic weddings I've been too.
2007-11-18 03:38:27 · answer #9 · answered by stinky4sam 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in general it is not done due to it offends most women. It was done long ago when women couldn't vote. If it is still being used in the catholic church your getting married in chances are they will offer to take it out. Or if you desire to have it taken out they will do it.
2007-11-18 01:59:17 · answer #10 · answered by shutters 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋