What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
The position of the dirt bag.
Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it.
What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.
What do lawyers use for birth control?
Their personalities.
What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
20 kgs.
What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
45 minutes.
What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.
Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.
Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and
good-looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in year 9.
Who has the biggest boobs?
The blonde, because she's 18.
What's the difference between a porcupine and a police car?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
'Are you sure it's mine?'
Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Pepper spray will do that to you .
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.
What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.
What's the difference between an Australian zoo and a English zoo?
An Australian zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage
along with... 'a recipe..'
How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F... Word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
What's the difference between a northern USA fairytale and a southern USA
fairytale?
A Northern fairytale begins 'Once upon a time...'
A southern fairytale begins 'Y'all ain't gonna believe this ****...'
Why is there no Disneyland in China?
No one's tall enough to go on the good rides.
2007-11-17 23:50:04 · 24 answers · asked by Smurf 7 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
I know I already posted this on P&S, But I thought it deserved to be on here too
2007-11-17 23:51:05 · update #1
Ducky! : I can see why you are stillon level one. You need to get a life
2007-11-17 23:59:10 · update #2
Thank you for that, it made me laugh. =oD
I especially liked this one:
'What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.'
2007-11-17 23:55:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I prefer the questions but it is good to start the day with a smile on your face.
Don't take everything so serious and just enjoy it for what it is. An attempt to make someone smile. Some of those responding need to take a chill pill - or the entire bottle.
2007-11-18 00:04:31 · answer #2 · answered by Levi 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Love the one about the Harley
2007-11-17 23:57:59 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good ones! Funny!
2007-11-18 13:06:59 · answer #4 · answered by cats 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very Funny... thanks for making me have a chuckle before I go to bed!
I"m an Aussie so just had to at the zoo joke!
2007-11-18 00:38:53 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Smurf oldies but GOODIES
I had a good laugh anyway big THANKS
Top marks & *
Ducky get a grip, LAUGH a little, it may cheer you up.
2007-11-18 02:26:42 · answer #6 · answered by DINGLE 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
some old one some good ones but gave me a laugh
2007-11-17 23:53:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had a good laugh.Thanks.
I am blond,and i think i picked the right Avatar...lol.
2007-11-17 23:57:04 · answer #8 · answered by chrissy 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Good ones!
2007-11-17 23:54:52 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
quite funny, i liked the lawer , birth control joke
2007-11-17 23:54:05 · answer #10 · answered by Beautiful - 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋