i'm just going to come right out with it. should i seek professional help?

Question

i have been suffering depression for several years now. i have my good days... like when my sons were born... but for the most part i am almost always in a funk. i try to joke about serious things, just to make them a little less stressful. i try to pretend things don't bother me as much as they do. but some times it just gets so heavy in my heart and in my head that it seems as if there is no escaping it. i know many people recomend getting a job, but i have several physical conditions that limit what i can do. and i do get out almost every day and just... breathe. but that funky little blue thing... that demon that calls itself depression... stays very close behind me.

then, there are days when the end of everything seems so very easy to reach for. it's just right there. and if i just grab it... savor it.. everything will be ok. but two little voices remind me that i need to stay.. at least a little while longer. it's my boys... telling me they love me. and that they need me.

Answer 1

For sure, Get some medication for this depression. Get a top notch psychiatrist.
Besides, don't you want to feel better not just for yourself, but for your boys.
I hate depression.

Answer 2

I would suggest seeing a therapist. The depression could be caused by circumstances, but it could also be caused by a chemical imbalance. Either way, there is a chemical imbalance now. There are three different neurotransmitters that are responsible for depression. If the combination of the three is not correct a person will become depressed. Fortunately there are medications for all three types of neurotransmitters.
There are medications both to stop the reputake of the transmitters (such as Prozac), and to have more neurotransmitters produced.
Because there are so many different ways the brain may be messing up, it may take a while to get on the right antidepressant. But hopefully one of them will work for you. Also, please note that Antidepressants take a while to work, usually up to 2 months. So please don't be discouraged if you start taking it and don't notice a change for a while.

I was depressed for years and finally sought help. Now I am able to work full time and go to college full time. I feel like a new person. I have a sense of purpose that was lost a long time ago. I have ambition and drive that the depression had sucked right out of me.

Counseling can also be helpful, you can learn new ways of thinking, because the thinking of depression makes depression worse. So taking the medication will help relieve the symptoms and the therapy can help relieve the actual problem.

Answer 3

As a fellow sufferer, I would say that you should get some help. It's not weak - it shows strength. You will be doing it for the good of your self and your family. Don't your boys deserve a father who is happy?

What is keeping you depressed is the way you are thinking. Also covering up how you feel is keeping you down. I can understand why you are doing it, but it's not helping you. It increases your sense of isolation.

Examine your thinking in this message. You are falling into patterns that keep you down. Eg thinking in black and white terms - "there's no escaping it". Surely the truth is closer to this "There are some days when I cope with my negative feelings better than others".

You can change your perceptions - it just takes work! It's hard work, but you can do it. You need to work on challenging your negative thought patterns. I found Cognitive Behavioural Therapy helped me. It takes time and you have to be determined - but it can be done.

I also found anti-depressants helped at the same time - they give you the lift that you need to start tackling it.

I wish you every success. Depression is very real, very difficult and causes misery. But you don't have to live with it. You have the answers in your head, even if you don't think so right now.

Sending you a smile, in case you need it today. :-) x

Answer 4

If you don't start getting the sh** off your chest that is mentally harming you, your situation could quickly exashurbate to a rash descision that would destroy your 2 angels that need their father. Get a psychiatrist quick. Just remember that not every or any psych. is the one for you. Pay attention to how comfortable they make you feel. Also observe the way they talk to you (i.e. cutting you off, minimizing your issues, belittling you, etc.). Pay attention to their body language-just little things that will show you if that is the person that will help you and not just be someone you or your insurance is paying to act or seem as if they care. It sounds funny, but in order to find the right psychiatrist one must "shop around" for a bit! Healing yourself is # 1 at this point and the one that will lead you there has to be 100%. In addition, be careful when it comes to meds. Lots of docs. like to give cocktails. Taking several meds.= more than just several side effects. One of the worst side effect is the complete loss of your labido. Trust me on that one. It ruins relationships, or at least makes it really crappy for the significant other. My biggest suggestion though is to have a therapist or psych. give you a test/tests to see exactly what disorder/disorders you may be suffering from so that you and them can nip this thing in the bud and start your road to "normality" quickly. Good luck to you.
P.S. You hold importance to many people around you-especially your boys-and it would be selfish to completely disappear from their lives, leaving them with no choice except the feelings of loss, anger, sadness, and hopelesness. It also gives your sons a bad example as death being a problem solver. Life is hard but you CAN handle it. LOL :)

Answer 5

Do not Use your Physical conditions as a excuse to not work.

I have ceberal palsy and I work, Plus if a Person with no arms and oor legs can drive a truck you can get a Job, but with your condition your job out look may be limited, Now most of my life I have been bitter and Angry and I had therapists to all they did was junk me up on meds they dont care about your problems, they just listen to you to diagnose you with a mental condition they they give you a medication.
. If you are not content with what you have, you will never be content with what you dont. so if your yearning for something more take that into consideration. about depression You need to find a way to rule it before it rules you. Im sorry but your a grown Man as I am to I have a disability and I was discrinated my whole life, No one is going to help you in the way you can help yourself. and that is the truth and your sons should be enough motivation to want to change. If not then the problem is not depression but selfishness.

Answer 6

Beleive it or not you will cured soon. Fifteen years ago I woke up and could barely get out of bed. I had full blown clinical depression. It's caused by your brain chemistry. You don;t have to see a shrink and probably not even a specialist. I went to my family doctor and he gave me two antideppresants. They probably have better drugs now days, The ones I took takes 3 or 4 weeks for the chemicals to build up in the brain and then started feeling much better. Also during my recovery I forced myself to go to the 'y' everyday and work out ( but you can't do that) and also established a relationship, I think those two things probably helped to. So try to get more involved with a hobby and get a pet if you don't have one. Bottom line: depression is a physical illnes and can be cured with drugs Good luck.

Answer 7

Listen to those 2 little voices, they need you. One of the greatest human needs is to BE needed, and you are. Even when they are adults, they would still be put through unbearable pain if you left them in that way.
Yes, seek help, there are ways to help you feel better.
On the physical side, I would recommend reading the book "Sugar Blues". Faulty carbohydrate metabolism is one of the biggest contributing factors in depression.. Believe it or not, your diet can be as much a factor as your situation in life. Once your body chemistry is right, that funky fog could lift without chemical intervention,
Oh, and try writing poetry, or a novel, you seem to have a gift for words.
Get in touch with your creative side, some of the greats have suffered depression, they say you have to suffer for art. I have a strong suspicion that Stephen King is one.

Answer 8

You get help when you ask if you need help, which is now. Being suicidal isn't going to help your boys. First, see a doctor. You may have a really simple condition, like low thyroid, which is easy to fix. Or you might need a combination of medicine and therapy. If you had a broken leg, would you hesitate to get a cast? No? Well, brain chemistry is the same thing. Really, you've asked three questions on this, just get help now.

Would you want your sons to kill themselves? Sons of suicides often do. Is that the lesson you want for them in the future, to reach for the easy solution?

Answer 9

See depression treatments, at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris in section 2, and consult a doctor, to eliminate thyroid problems, etc. as possible contributing factors. It is your decision, and yours alone, as to whether to take any antidepressants offered, but, before you do, read section 1, and check medications out at www.drugs.com so you will be on the lookout for side effects, like sexual dysfunction. My strong recommendation, however, is to follow the advice of my doctor, his partner, and also Marcelle Pick, OB/GYN NP, and Dr. Mercola, as well, at http://www.mercola.com and avoid antidepressants (page 2V refers, & antidepressant websites: page 2). All of their advice, (except prayer, because many people are not religious) I have incorporated into the "core treatments", including others as options, such as herbal remedies (none of which have been conclusively demonstrated to work with severe depression). If you are diagnosed with clinical (major) depression, antidepressants may be necessary for a while, which will give the treatments time to become effective. The antidepressants themselves need at least several days, or even many weeks to reach full effectiveness. It's a good idea to taper off them slowly, with medical advice, after several months, say, to a couple of years, at most, because they are only effective in the long term for about 30% of people. Because of this, you would be well advised to begin the treatments immediately, and maintain them. I'd just thank your mental health care provider, and pocket the prescription, trying the treatments for a few months, to see if they are sufficient for you, before considering filling it. Consider volunteering, even from home, at first, as a form of occupational therapy, and it forms a solid basis in reality for the daily affirmations, and helps others, all at the same time. Pages 47, and 38 refer.

Answer 10

Why is everyone recommending medication? The thing that differentiates human beings from every other species on the planet is the wide range of emotions we're capable of feeling. Maybe it is depression. Everyone, at some point or another, experiences it. But I think that by defining our lives in accordance to the rules stipulated by psychological discourse, we cloud our foresight and taint our ability to rationalize our emotions. Next time your hear those two little voices asking you to stick around awhile longer, listen to them. Embrace them with your heart. Don't let depression dictate how to live your life. Instead, let your boys take you by the hand. I'm sure they'd be more than happy to lead...

Answer 11

Please do seek help, if not for you, for your sons.

Modern medicine will make you feel much better, and when you are a happier person, you are a better parent. If you can't work, it helps to be involved in some regular activities, book club, gym anything. Human are designed to be in groups, and you are no exception, once you find the social circle you belong to, and getting some help, you will feel better.

Good luck! Never give up on yourself! NEVER!