YOu may have education but if you don't have natural people skills was University a waste?

Question

University people think that all students who enter and graduate will be great and ready for great jobs. But its not the case speciallly for shy, reserved super quiet people. I managed to graduate but i never did talk. i'm not good at speaking and i've never had social skills .

So now 4 years after graduation i'm just with a temporary 12 dollar an hour job, . . . i may be smart but that means crap in america. Maybe in other countries you can get by with just smart but here...if you're not outgoing and cheerful you're nothing to companies.

im a shy quiet guy and i will not change.
But as evidenced by my current job, i do more work than many of these talkatives who just slack off and dont do work. isn't worrk ethic, rather than outgoing personality, more important?

Then the jobs that dont require outgoing personatliy, pay so little. how can you live?

Answer 1

I am sad to say that all working harder means is that youget more work to do.

Management does not care who gets the work done, only that it gets done

Answer 2

A university education is never a "waste" if you got it for the right reasons...to get educated in a subject you are passionate about, and not to be a yuppie making a ton of money. Bill Gates is a university dropout, and has no social skills by a number of reports...but he's one of the richest men in the world. Same with many of the billionaires out there.

At any rate, you don't have to be the life of the party in order to have "social skills." Many engineers, scientists and executives do not have "social skills" but still they pull down six figures. There are restaurant workers, office clerks, sales associates who are very gregarious but they'll never make more than $10 an hour because pink collar jobs tend to pay notoriously low.

It's not a matter of either/or. Both work ethic and the ability to get along and work well with your co-workers is important. You don't have to keep up a running conversation or constantly slap folks on the back and tell jokes 24/7, but you do need to be able to be respectful and considerate, and know how to listen (quiet people have that advantage over more talkative types), be able to be impartial (again another trait quiet ones tend to have more than chatterers)...and also not give the impress you think you are better than the others. Suggestion: next time the group gets together...GO. Just make an appearnance. That way you look like a team player and not a snob. It may make a difference when promotion and raise time comes.

There are ways to improve your social skills without changing your basic personality. Try taking a Dale Carnegie course or some other self-improvement class. Your career may very well depend on it.

another option: start your own business.

At any rate, Don't give up and fall into a negative mindset...that's the thing that will keep you down...

Instead, keep striving and you'll make it...on YOUR terms!

Good luck.

Answer 3

Who are the university people you are addressing in your first sentence?

To say that you will not change seems like a stubborn statement. Perhaps this is an area in your personality you need to work on? You seem intelligent, as far as I can see anyways. But honestly, you cannot compare yourself to people at your workplace. As you said, they also work in a "temporary 12 dollar an hour job". Obviously they are not going to have the same skills as you.

Relax, take the time out for your personal gain once and a while. Start searching for the job that best suits you, and you will find it. You are right, it may not be your degree that helps you get your next job, but how your attitude is when you approach it.

Answer 4

What's your job field?

Listen - I would go for a week easy in college w/o ever talking to anyone else other than maybe the checkout lady. I'm a dyed in the wool introvert.

However, you learn to cope and work in a business environment. You should ALWAYS be polite and ALWAYS be pleasant when you deal with people. Be kind and offer assistance. You can be quiet all you want but what you do and say should reflect how you want to be thought of. Bitterness will come across and people will avoid you because that's all you show.

Networking is a skill that's difficult to master. For introverts, focus on competency and making a difference. Let people live their own lives - you focus on your own.

Answer 5

Work on you People Skills or look for a Job that Has Little or No Contact with the public. I do not know what your Degree is in, so I am at a loss for suggestions. Facility Managers ( Maintenance Engineers) can make LONG Money and are not required to have ANY People Skills. I.T. people make Good money and they have little contact with people.

Answer 6

OMFG I can totally relate! College, for me, has been a richly educational experience full of knowledge, but knowledge for what? How am I going to apply this to the real world? Also, I am very shy. I don't know how I will apply all these book smarts, but going to college is a good thing so people will think highly of you. But I totally understand where you're coming from and, yes, it is a sad situation that needs to be changed immediately.

Answer 7

you don't need people skills to make good money. coders and stuff that work in a cube can do ok. you can still be shy and have great people skills. you are blaming your career problems on your personality train (shyness) and you are not taking responsibility. if you want to keep making what you are making, keep doing what you are doing and keep complaining that society won't let you advance. if you are not willing to develop your skills somewhat, you will probably not advance. and that is true for outgoing people as well. you have to be willing to change and adapt to the marketplace.
i think it's a cop out saying you can't change and it's because you're quiet that you are faililng. i think you don't understand the difference between outgoingness and developing good working relationships.

Answer 8

personality and people skills go a long way. you can teach most people to do most jobs, but you cannot teach a personality to everyone. get a life coach or some etiquette classes to learn how to deal w/certain situations that will be comfortable for you. Also what is your major in? That could be the prob and not your shyness.

Answer 9

I used to be very quite person. As I met more people at the workplace and school, I learned to be little talkative. All you need is SELF-CONFIDENCE. You might think you are down there because of the minority you mentioned above. When you are with a group of people, always think that you have an education that you can be proud of. Especially when you are with uneducated ones, be proud that you are more educated than them. When you are with educated people, be proud that you have the same educational level with them. Always think positive and learn to have self-confidence.

Answer 10

Perhaps you need an instant cure for your problem. I suggest you go to the person who hired you and say,

"I am tired of doing a better job than others and not getting a proper monetary reward. I am not going to take it anymore. I will quit if another month goes by and some new arrangement is not made... Period."

No whining, no moaning. Just make the above statement and excuse yourself.


Regards,
Texian

Answer 11

Don't ever put yourself down. You can accomplish anything you put your mind to. The fact that you went to University and graduated, says a whole lot. Attend a few motivational talks. Read the book, "How to Win Friends and Influence Them" by Dale Carnegie and see the difference in your life. Email me and lets talk about it.