2007-11-16 11:52:48 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I have 6 teenagers in my house. They get a certain time limit to clean their room. If they don't get it done, I go in with garbage bags, and it doesn't matter what I pick up, except if it's towels, or something that belongs to someone else. Out it goes in the garbage bag. They know I am firm on this, they have not let it happen a second time. Good luck.
2007-11-16 11:56:25 · answer #1 · answered by oh_my_its_linda 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Linda with the six kids has an excellent suggestion, the garbage bag action works well. I had to use it with my teens a couple of times when they were growing up.
I would not throw away items that my husband and I had paid for, but they would be removed until the room was brought under control.
Young people quickly learn a bit more organization and respect when some of their favorite clothing and other items have disappeared.
One of my friends is going through this with her daughter who will be fifteen soon and there are going to be no Christmas gifts this year because the I Pod and Wii and various CDs and DVDs are lost in the mess. This young lady had even gone to other family members, aunts and uncles to ask for replacement for the items and they have all said no.
It is a stage, one of my son's friends went through it when they were growing up, and when he was sixteen he was interested in a young lady.
When he tried to talk to her she basically told him that she thought he smelled disgusting, and he went home after school that day and cleaned the room and even washed laundry. He smelled, because his parents got tired of nagging him to pick up the dirty clothes and he wouldn't put the clean clothes away...the whole room was like a clothes hamper.
A few days later, his parents were complaining that he was taking at least two showers per day and using enough hair product for a salon.....talk about a turn around....
My daughter was not allowed to invite friends over or attend a couple of school dances if her room was out of control. She became much more responsible about it once she realized her Dad and I were not going to back down.
Have you talked to your daughter about this? Does she like living in dirt, or is she just going threw the sloppy stage? Give her a time to get it cleaned up and then resort to the garbage bag use.
Good luck, and remember, this too shall pass.
2007-11-16 12:22:12 · answer #2 · answered by Sue F 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sue F had a great answer.
I have not had kids, but I was a teenager not long ago. I think a major challenge for teens is that they only have a small bedroom to store all of their stuff. Also, they have a lot more loose items, like CDs, papers from school, knick-knack gifts from relatives, photos of friends, etc.
I think the best solution with no yelling or hurt feelings is to get her some really good organization tools, based on what kinds of things are floating around in her room. CD racks for CDs. A small filing cabinet for important school papers. A scrapbook for pictures and other mementos. A dresser if there isn't enough room for all of her clothes.
One thing my mom did was to ask me to pick out clothes that I didn't wear anymore and donate them to Goodwill, before she bought me new clothes.
Also, you should get some boxes and offer to box up things that she cherishes from childhood, like stuffed animals or toys, which she no longer uses but still wants to keep.
2007-11-16 13:09:13 · answer #3 · answered by jellybeanchick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am a mom of 7 - only one teen at home right now,and 3 younger ones98,5 and 8 weeks)my other 4 are older,but I did the same thing with them., what I tell them all is they have a choice
they can either
A) get it cleaned up by themselfs NOW
or
B) I will go in with a trash bag and everything goes to the garbage
if they choose not to clean it themselfs, I also ground them for the weekend, no friends,no phone, no games,no outdoors
it took a few rounds of me doing this for them to realise I meant business,but they now know when I say room time - if they want to keep there stuff and have privladges they better bust a move.
I usually give them 3 hours max to clean the room (I think this is plenty of time)
2007-11-16 12:14:29 · answer #4 · answered by country_girl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Defeintly don't throw her stuff away. I'm 16, and I know I would not forgive my parents if they threw my stuff away. It's her room, so just let her live in it. My room is a pgsty usually, but it's been clean for awhile because my parents said my friends can't come over until it's cleaned. So I spent the whole day working on it (and it did take a whole day), and it's still clean. Also make sure a hamper is always in there, because half the times its messy for me its just clothes, and I didn't have a hamper in the either, so they just all went on the floor.
Just remind her that friends won't be coming over until it's clean or whatever and she'll clean it =]]
2007-11-16 12:13:54 · answer #5 · answered by preciouslily1991 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Good question. My inclination is to have her clean it....she should respect her belongings and her space, and it is a part of your home, which you provide. My kids are 7 and 9 and they tidy their rooms now almost daily.
As a side note my hubby and I saw some show on tv in which a teenager's room was a total disaster and I said, "my kids won't be like that" and he actually got mad at me and said I was being naive.......as if expecting a teen to not be a slob is expecting too much.
His kids are teens, but they don't live with us full-time, and I have a tendancy to ask them to straighten up before it gets to the point of total chaos!
2007-11-16 12:13:12 · answer #6 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well let me give u my advice for whats its worth.As a mother if two boys both of which had pigsties for rooms..I would go in there and clean it up and in 2 days it was back the way it was, so I decided to let them live in it. But if it was maybe there birthday or something I would clean it up but usually I let them live in it.
2007-11-16 12:09:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My brother is the same way. My mom tries to compromise and tell him to just organize the mess. LOL Asking him to actually put things where they go is asking a BIT too much for him. So as long as it doesn't look a total wreck, then it's OK.
2007-11-16 12:12:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well i'm 16 and i used to hate it when my mom told me to clean my room, because i was fine with how it was, and i didnt understand why she cared. but one day she threw away everything that was out of place, my clothes on the floor, shoes that weren't on the shoe rack, hair ties, and i came home thinking she cleaned my room, until i checked my closet and all my clothes were gone. i beggggged for my things back and luckily she hadn't thrown out my clothes yet, but the shoes were gone =/ ever since then, my room has been oh-so-neat, and i love it =] well thats how i learned. she might scream, and say she hates you and whatnot, but she doesnt mean it. be firm on this! if you give in, she won't listen, and it'll just be a vicious cycle. hope that helps =]
2007-11-16 12:01:37 · answer #9 · answered by jadonam 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tomorrow is Saturday and a great day to have her really Tidy up. No going anywhere until its done and then buy her lunch!
2007-11-16 11:56:51 · answer #10 · answered by nancie_usa 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋