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Blonde paint job
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."

2007-11-16 09:35:29 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music Jokes & Riddles

12 answers

haha i read this b4 but it never gets old...

2007-11-16 09:38:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

I deffinately just posted that lol. here is another one
An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.

The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"

The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"
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Poor guy
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

2007-11-16 17:40:41 · answer #2 · answered by pyrgus_finn 2 · 4 0

Hahahahahahahahahahaha

2007-11-16 17:40:06 · answer #3 · answered by O 3 · 0 0

Funny! 10!

2007-11-16 17:38:15 · answer #4 · answered by cats 7 · 1 0

OUCHH!!!
OOOOH I can sooo totally see the man's expression on his face right now.....
I really hope the paint washes off....

2007-11-16 22:06:39 · answer #5 · answered by fatiimaq08 3 · 0 0

Funny! lol!

2007-11-16 17:52:35 · answer #6 · answered by Jess 2 · 0 0

hahaha~~~
i wud be pissed if that happened!
stoopid blonde!
lmao
gud 1~
xx

2007-11-16 17:40:05 · answer #7 · answered by *Facepalm* 5 · 1 0

lol

2007-11-16 20:13:38 · answer #8 · answered by sarahsweethearty 2 · 0 0

lol

2007-11-16 17:45:42 · answer #9 · answered by manaymaintnoneyobizznuzz 5 · 0 0

lol

2007-11-16 17:45:22 · answer #10 · answered by lalala 3 · 0 0

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