Am I stupid for being mad when he tells me.. i can do whatever I want to do??

Question

To me.. that is wrong.. If he is spending hours on the pc when i am home from work and I walk in and ask.. whats up.. he says.. its my pc.. i can do whatever I want to do..

Isnt that just rude.. and childish?

Or when dealing with my kids he says.. Im the adult here.. you cant talk to me that way.. but he is acting the exact same way as me 14 year old daughter..?

is ok for me to get mad at this.. or am i suppost to just brush it off and go about my own business??

we have been together 5 years.. he lives with me..?

NO, He was not this way when we got together.. he was a happy guy who loved the world.. then we got sober..

and now he is a cynical life hater..

His total person has changed in the past 2 years.. he is not at all who he was when I met him.. now he treats me like I am a nosy mom.. or something..

Answer 1

No, you are *not* stupid for being mad when he tells you "I can do whatever I want to do".

First, of course he can do whatever he wants to; it's not against the law. But rudeness isn't against the law either. Doesn't mean you have to accept it.

So, yes, it is rude and (possibly) childish depending on the circumstances of that behavior.

Although you can go about your own business, getting mad probably doesn't help either. Of course, you can *acknowledge* those angry feelings; however, it would be potentially most profitable if you sat down with him and expressed your honest feelings. If you feel that he should tell you that *he's* the adult here (implying that you are not), if you are 18 or older then (in my opinion) you should tell him that you don't feel he's being inclusive and treating *you* as an adult.

He needs to at least acknowledge your honesty and respect your feelings. If not, it would most likely be best that you move away from this relationship.

Answer 2

Seriously?! You have been together five years and this is the first time the problem has come up? Umm... didn't you know who he was when you got together? Asking him to change is an approach, but your probably best if you can just accept him for who he is. What you need to decide is if his behavior is something that you are willing to live with or not. If you try and sweep it under the carpet you'll only end up getting more frustrated in the long run. Talk to him. Let him know how you're feeling. See if you two can come to some sort of agreement. If not, then what the hell have you been doing for the last five years?

Answer 3

I love every body answer on here, that's why I'm on here giving my question and answer. Anyways, my opinion is the same with everybody else. In a relationship, i feel people should respect each other no matter how mad they get. My option is, if u love this person and he is not giving u respect no way. If it a long relationship try to work it out, but if it a short relationship don't wast ur time. follow these step or make ur own rules like this.
1 tell him that u love him
2 let him know that he change
3 bring back good memory to the picture, u know the good time that yaw spent together
4 take him some where nice, like the first time u met
5 take some time being together.
what i listed was some problem that happen to me and i try this step. it may work or it may not. but if it doesn't work then hes a loser. sometime people loose their ineterest on each other, but it up to u to bring it back. remember switch up from time to time. spice up ur relationship. life is about having a lil fun with the one u love. if u sit there or work all day, u just wasted time . the brain is the second powerful thing in a human body. its true, because people kill before they can think and sue-side people need to think before killing them-self. Just move on if he still act like a baby, but first sit down n talk to him.

Answer 4

Wow he's not grown up has he, he's not going to change with out some pushing. I agree with you that he's being very rude. He should look at his priorities and get them straight. He's going to keep acting like a brat and if you've been together that long he may have to move out to get himself straight-grow up and be a man or you really need to move on...
Be happy

Answer 5

I wish I could answer that one for you but I am going through something similar. My boyfriend throws temper tantrums all the time and I feel like I have two children instead of one.

Yes he is being childish, but the questions is what do you want to do about it? If you ignore it it will continue, if you confront him he will deny it. Video tape him when he is acting that way and show it to him later. At least that is what I have thought about doing...lol.

Answer 6

Sounds like it's time for a come-to-jesus talk. Tell him how you feel and why. Then give him a chance to make changes. If he makes those changes for you, then you're golden. If not, then you have a decision to make; deal with it, or move on.

Answer 7

sounds like he needs to grow up and for him to say it's his pc and he can do whatever he wants makes him sound just a little guilty. Maybe you need to talk to him about how he should handle situations with your daughter. Good luck!

Answer 8

This is your buisness. Your kids are your buisness. If he is being rude and childish like he definatly sounds like he is being then it is time to move on girl! Good luck!

Answer 9

Rachel T, Dear drop the boy and get a genleman !

Answer 10

He;s not respecting you.Sit down with him and talk with him. Don't accuse him, just make it known to him that it hurts your feeling's when he talks to like that and laddiadida...