My boyfriend absolutely hates my friends because he says they're just not his type of people. He says that in a calm, rational way but when it comes to being around them, right afterwards he'll completely talk smack about them FOREVER. It's the most annoying thing I've ever heard. and how can i not be upset at the fact that he always has to say something bad about them. How come he can't just accept that they're people he doesn't like and GET OVER IT?
What do i do now?
2007-11-16 05:05:16 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This situation does make me think that maybe he thinks that I have bad judgement of people if he ABSOLUTELY HATES my friends. Especially since my friends and I are very much alike and we get along on everything. I have talked to him about being more respectful but he says that I'm NOTHING like my friends and that I'm entitled to be friends with whoever I want. And YET he'll still talk TRASH to no end. I do think I'm like my friends and maybe he just doesn't understand who I am?
2007-11-16 05:22:32 · update #1
Its not all that bad. me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 2 years now and neither one of us like each others friends, except for one each. It works well for us because he goes out with his friends and i go out with mine separately and then at the end of the night when all the friends are gone we get together and spend the rest of the night together. It keeps us from not doing EVERYTHING together which i believe is healthy cause otherwise id have to hurt him eventually. Just tell him i appreciate your honesty about not liking my friends but they are my friends for a reason just like you are my man for one too. If you cant stand to be around them maybe we should try a seperate friends night out once in a while.
2007-11-16 05:11:55 · answer #1 · answered by augustgrl80 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say this as if there was no remedy to the solution. They are not married or legally bound what's keeping her and him in the relationship? Perhaps they are weird and that's what they both want. Him someone to hate and be abusive to and her someone to be a victim of and complain of and maybe both of them are attention seekers. The best thing you can do for your friend and should do for her is to downplay her complaints say something like "oh how boring" or "sucks to be you" and change the subject otherwise your friend will continue using this method to get attention.
2016-05-23 10:14:43 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's not the guy for you. Ask yourself do your friends like your boyfriend? If they dont then the relationship probably shouldn't be prolonged. It doesnt sound like a healthy relationship. Im not telling you to break up with him but sit down and talk to him about it. And if you really want to stay with him just keep him away from your friends....but then you'll find the relationship is more trouble than it's worth.
2007-11-16 05:09:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is kind of an insult toward you. It's like saying you have bad judgment about people. Your friends are like a reflection of you...that makes me think, does he dislike you in anyway. Nobody is perfect but you like certain people for some of their positive qualities. If he doesn't like them then that is fine but how is that going to look when you go to parties together or have parties and invite them over. That is too much stress. And Hate is a pretty strong word...make sure he doesn't drive your friends away.
2007-11-16 05:12:44 · answer #4 · answered by jelljem 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all FRIENDS come before boyfriiends and if he cant accept your friiends than you shouldnt accept him!!!...
your friends will always be there for you and he is only there because you guys are going out... what if you want to hang out with them but he wants to hang out with you also... you can only make a choice on which ones you want to hang out with... if you choose your friiends he will most likely leave you thinking your friends are more important... and if you go with him... then your friends will think your boyfriend is more important!!!.... so your situation is tough but now i believe you have to make your own decision...
think about the ones you love the most!!
GooD luCk..!!:)
2007-11-16 05:12:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had an ex that hated my friends. It got lonely, and he would refuse to hang out with us, then get jealous when I hung out with them (male OR female)
Needless to say, hes out of the picture.
It will eventually come between you two. You need to talk to him about it, and if you cant agree, you know what to do from there. Just the fact that he does not respect your choices in friends does not reflect well on how he will react to other choices.
2007-11-16 05:09:45 · answer #6 · answered by melissa 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why are you dating someone like that? Someone who can talk like that about people that he knows you care about, while being all nice to their faces, is someone who could turn on YOU in a heartbeat. He doesn't sound like a very nice person, to be honest. True best friends are forever, but guys come and go. This one needs to go.
2007-11-16 05:15:02 · answer #7 · answered by ♛Qu€€n♛J€§§¡¢a♛™ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's insecure. He obviously feels inferior towards them. Are they more educated, interesting or attractive than he? Be honest with yourself. He may feel that you think more of your friends than him, hence the insecurities. We always think of women being needy, but men can be also. Not that you should do it , but you may need to stroke his ego. But just remember if you start it you'll have to continue it, then you may see him as being weak. And it's nothing more less attractive as a weak man. Under no circumstances do you allow him to convince you to dump your friends. If he tries to be that controlling, then you definitely don't need him, move on quickly!
2007-11-16 05:17:51 · answer #8 · answered by dtown 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is bad. Your boy probably wants you all too himself, and can't stand it when you talk to your friends and not him. Maybe you are spending too much time with your friends and he feels left out? Or maybe he is just a jerk. You are probably going to have to decide between your bf and your friends. Think about who means more to you, it won't be easy, good friends are just as hard to come by as good boyfriends or girlfriends. You'll have to decide who cares about you more, and who you care about more.
2007-11-16 05:17:28 · answer #9 · answered by sunnydog_d13 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my bf hates my friends and my friends hate my bf but because they both love me, they put up with each other for my sake.
I have told both my friends and my bf that I will not tolerate either of them talking **** about the other party because it show disrespect towards me when they do. and just to make my point completely clear, I have stopped talking to them for days at a time when they do. They don't do it anymore.
I sugguest you do the same.
2007-11-16 05:10:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋