Ok,here's the story...
I like a guy who's 18,lets call him A and I'm 14.
I broke up with my boyfriend last month,cause we had a fight and I realised that I wasn't in love with him,so I didn't want to mislead him...
I wanted to go for a drink with my cousin today,but my mom said no cause she thinks that my cousin will try to hook me up with A. She told my sister that my ex boyfriend is really great and better than A. She also said she was happy cause I was going on a party tomorrow,cause my ex is gonna be there and we could maybe hook up again.
She never met any of them and is just saying that cause my older brother doesn't like A.
My brother isn't a good student,he ditches school often and only likes guys like that. A is a good student,doesn't fight often with guys his age and is shy. That's why my brother doesn't like him. On the other hand,my ex is also shy and nice as a friend,and we're still friends,but I like A.
Here's the story of me and A:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=ApXzCEPRBDLeLAWoO8x7i07sy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20071114092031AAIx6RK
2007-11-16 05:01:39 · 30 answers · asked by glad to help :) 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
What should I do?
I am really angry with my mum now cause she doesn't know my ex or A,so she doesn't have the right to judge them...
2007-11-16 05:02:28 · update #1
Guys,I just like him,I'm not even coonsidering sex and I know for certain that he is a virgin...
And I know he could get to jail,so I'm not trying to be with him or anything...
But,I hate the fact that mum wants me to get bak with my ex (he's 16) when I don't like him,only as a friend....
2007-11-16 05:11:43 · update #2
It's a birthday party!!!
2007-11-16 05:12:23 · update #3
There is a huge difference between 14 and 18 - more so than between 21 and 25. Part of that has to do with the fact that your personal experiences from this point on are going to be very different. 18 is generally the point at which a person's social network tends to change rather dramatically.
Even the best of friends from high school can drift apart after they leave and its even harder on relationships. I think your mom may realize this and is just, in her own way, trying to help you avoid getting your feelings caught up in something that may be very hard on you further down the line.
That is not to say that this relationship won't work - its just that the odds are stacked against it as each of you continue to grow and mature in your own way through difference social and peer groups.
Having said that - There are three things to consider
1) he is a friend and parents shouldn't interfer with friendships just simply based on what 'might' happen. You need to have some freedom to make your own choices and the consequences of your own mistakes. It builds character as they say :-)
2) You aren't 16 yet and in general your parents are legally responsible for you and your actions. Part of being a parent is weighing your responsibility for you kids with allowing them the opportunities that will make them adults. Its a fine line and while it may not seem fair some days, its also something that no one has a guide book for to say "this is how you do it".
3) At 18 and 14, A could get into a mess of legal trouble if for some reason you ended up pregnant. At 18 A is expected to know better and is legally bound to be looking out for your best interests the same as your parents. Now we all know from growing up that the legal realities of relationships and sex and the practical realities are substantially different. But just the same . . .
Bottom line however is that there is no "fair" in this situation - there is only what is and how your actions are going to impact on others around you. And only you can make that choice. Regardless of the legalities of teenhood you still have your own freewill to make up your own mind.
2007-11-16 05:35:57 · answer #1 · answered by behr 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that at 14, you should stick to guys closer to your own age. In three or four years that age difference won't get in your way, but now it could cause you problems you really don't want to deal with. I went through all that at 14, and would always suggest that anyone under 16 to date people only one or two years different from their own.
2007-11-16 05:09:08 · answer #2 · answered by tom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all let me say, I've been 14 and I know. If you like the guy A go for him. Tell your mom, that she doesn't know him like you and he reminds you a lot of your ex. Maybe even invite this guy over so your mom can see what a nice polite guy he is. Don't give up and try your best to get your guy. Best of Luck!
2007-11-16 05:10:08 · answer #3 · answered by Kriss 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your 14, and the guy you like is 18?? I hate to tell you but any 18 who would be with a 14 isnt in it for the relationship, their in it to get some. He might seem sweet and nice but I doubt that's it. If you dont want to be with your ex dont be. Its no bodies business but your own. Just be careful with the 18.
2007-11-16 05:11:03 · answer #4 · answered by angel324 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry but 14 year old's shouldn't date 18 year olds and any 18 year old guy that dates a 14 year old needs some counseling. Stay away from him. You only want him because your mom and brother don't approve. Move along, like you know you should.
2007-11-16 05:07:53 · answer #5 · answered by s01psb 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Most of the time parents want what's best for you. She isn't doing this to crowd you or make your life miserable, even though it may often seem like it. But she's doing it because she cares about you.
Fyi, you shouldn't hook up with an 18 year old boy at your age. It's not healthy and not to mention, illegal in most states!
2007-11-16 05:06:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
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2016-10-02 12:11:02 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK. first of all, at 14 you should be more concerned with your studies than with boys.
In the US, 14 is considered underage - which means that A should not even be looking at you as a potential girlfriend.
If I were you - I'd hit the books and study hard and not worry about boyfriends.
If A is as smart as you say he is - he'd run from you like all get-out - you're jail bait.
2007-11-16 05:07:24 · answer #8 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
First off, you are 14. You do not need to be dating an 18 year old. Secondly, if you were my daughter, you wouldn't have a boyfriend at all!
2007-11-16 05:04:59 · answer #9 · answered by Mandrew 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋
You are too young for a boyfriend or drinking. Wait 10 years and pull your head out!
P.S. I was born to a 14 y/o mother. My childhood SUCKED. Why don't you think about some consequences and do what you know is right?
2007-11-16 05:04:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋