I'm 16 years old and I have to choose between being a mom or going after a career?

Question

since i was a toddler, the one thing that I've wanted to do is be a wife and mother. I wanted to have at least 4 kids and also be a foster parent. But just recently, I've found something that I'm really good at and I would like to make a career out of: video production. my parents know i want to be a wife and mother, and they also know I'm interested in the film making. I'm finishing high school next semester, and the question of college has been coming up lately. I would absolutely love to go to Full Sail in Orlando, FL. It's a tech school that focuses on the entertainment industry and an hour away from where I live and I got more info on it throught the mail, and it's like a dream come true heaven in my eyes. But it's $68,000 for the 21 mo. film program that I'm interested in. My parents are really pushing me to go to Regent University in Virginia Beach, VA. they said i have to choose betweem stay-at-home large family mother, or video career.

if i choose career, they said that Full Sail looks like an awsome school and if that is what i want to do, it would be worth the money put into it (i'm telling ya, this place is awsome). but if i wanted to be a mom above career, then Regent would be better, they have a film/cinema program there and it's a Christian University, so i'd still get to be in film, but it wouldn't cost as much "for it doesn't make sense to pay so much, if you're not gonna use the education". I'd be able to do film (just not with as much equipment and opportunities that Full Sail has), and maybe I'd find that husband and eventually the family I want, for much less money (and with my 4.48 GPA and 17 college credits that i have, i could get up to 40% off tuition). i'm torn here. i would rather go to Full Sail (so badly), but i've always wanted to be a stay-at-home wife and mother with maybe a home buisness. what do i do?

i could still be a mom with a Full Sail education, but I would be a working mom with a kid in daycare (not that that is bad, but i really don't want that). if i'm gonna have kids, i want to be home with them the first 5 years. help.........

up did you people even read? i don't have a baby right now. and i don't want a baby until I'm married. don't jump to conclusions until you know. jeez.

you guys are right. i can have both my career and my family, by going to Regent. it's cheaper and not everyone makes it in the film industry, but i can still study it and get a job in it, without spending so much. thanks for the advice. Regent it is......

Answer 1

Ok let me let you in on a little something. My brother graduated from Full Sail earlier this year with a film meager. You want to know where he is now? Answering phones for a telemarketing company. Do you really think you are going to be the next Steven Spielberg??? The chances of you doing anything with that film degree are very slim to none. Get a real degree and get a real job then you will be able to afford having the kids you want.

Answer 2

What's great about todays age is you really don't have to choose. You CAN be a mother with a big family AND have a career. Some even do it at the same time! But you said you want to stay at home for 5 years with your kids when you first have them. That's fine, as long as your succesful first, or marry a guy with a good income. My advice is go visit both schools and pick whichever one you feel most comfortable at. Forget about the big family and the career while your there just think about the feel of the campus. Do you like the size? the professors? the students? Can you envision yourself spending 4 (or in some cases more) years there? There's a little saying that i like it goes 'while you're planning your life out, life happens.' No matter what your parents will be proud of you, and as long as you do something with what you've learned your education isn't wasted, even if you end up not going into your chosen field, you've still become a more knowledgable and well rounded person. Choose a school and just go where life takes you, if it takes in a more career oriented place awesome...if more family oriented awesome too!

Answer 3

I'm in college and I also love film. I think it is an amazing career to go into. This may sound strange but I also want to be a mom with at least 4 kids. Go to college because education is extremely important. If you want to go to full sail go. Don't worry about money there are all kinds of scholarships grants and loans. You can be a stay at home mom and maybe even do some film work on the side. Once your kids are grown you'll be ready to get deeper into your career. That's what my plan is. However you should do what is best for you. If you are really unsure pray about it you will get an answer. (read James 1:5-6)

Answer 4

I don't know what your parents are thinking to pressure you to make such a decision.
Go to school.

You have no idea when you will even get married!

Go to school. Get your education. Enjoy life. travel. Meet somebody. Keep working. Fall in love. Still working. Marry. Still working. Meanwhile saving your money. When you're have your first baby, stay home for a few months, see how you feel about the situation. I don't understand why you can't do both? I have multiple degrees. I have an interesting professional history. ANd now I have kids I am at hoem with, and a profession that I put enough effort and time into before my kids that I can go back to it whenever I choose. That is what a lot of women aim for. You can do it, too.
Life changes.
Asking a 16 year old to decide the entire course of her career is, to me, quite bizarre and cruel. I want my children to have every life experience possible, and that entails NOT make lifelong decisions at such ages. I don't even want my kids to pick college majors before they've had a year or two to take a variety of classes.

Answer 5

What's great about todays age is you really don't have to choose. You CAN be a mother with a big family AND have a career. Some even do it at the same time! But you said you want to stay at home for 5 years with your kids when you first have them. That's fine, as long as your succesful first, or marry a guy with a good income. My advice is go visit both schools and pick whichever one you feel most comfortable at. Forget about the big family and the career while your there just think about the feel of the campus. Do you like the size? the professors? the students? Can you envision yourself spending 4 (or in some cases more) years there? There's a little saying that i like it goes 'while you're planning your life out, life happens.' No matter what your paren

Answer 6

These are not the type of questions a parent should expect a 16 year old to be able to answer. I am impressed by your maturity and your desire to stay home with your kids once you have them. Obviously, not every respondant understands why that is important. I would suggest going to the school that you most want to go to. You only get one chance at each stage in your life, so don't back down because of what might happen later. You might not meet someone you want to marry and have kids with until you are 30 years old! That's plenty of years to have a great career using that degree and then you can still decide to stay home (or work) when you have your kids. You can always take a break for a few years to be with your kids and then go back to work too. There are many options, you don't have to pick just one. I wish you the best of luck!

Answer 7

You know, I think you ought to go to Full Sail! I am living proof that you can have it all- my career has been in culinary arts, and when I had worked a goodly number of years, I became a full-time mom, at age 32. There is no reason not to wait to have children- you needn't get married at an early age, and women in their 40's are having children these days. The truly beautiful thing about the era we're now living in is that a woman can do it all- we don't have to be married off by the age of 25 anymore, for fear of being spinsters. Go ahead and go to the school that offers more- a gal as intelligent and focussed as you appear to be can get all of the things that she wants in life, if she works for those specific goals- and don't let anyone tell you that you can't, or that you should limit yourself. Besides, by the time you are ready for family life, think of how established you'll be in your chosen industry- you could easily become a consultant or director, and work when and if you so choose- look at Jody Foster! I'd wish you good luck, but honestly, it sounds like you won't need it- your hard work and dedication will see you through! :)

P.S. These days, I have 2 kids under the age of 5- and yet, I also am a jewelry designer, and do catering for my friends and family- you'd be surprised what you can accomplish, even with a family that is your top priority! Life's gonna be what you make of it- good for you, for planning and thinking about these things so early!

Answer 8

Go to school - the school you want to go to.

Someday, you'll meet the man you will marry, and someday after that you'll decide to start your family. At this time in your life, there is no way of knowing when that is going to happen.

There is no reason that you can't get your education and have your career and then someday, when the time is right, leave work to be a home mommy for however long you want then either remain at home or go back.

I worked full time for a growing furniture company for 10 years, worked my way up until I reported directly to the company president. I gained an obscene amount of experience, by the time I left that job for maternity leave, I was qualified to perform any and every job description in the company from showroom design, office management, personal assistant, store manager, delivery coordinator, etc. After that 10 years, I was more than ready to quit and be a mommy full time, so I let them know... I've been a full time mom for over a year now and have never been happier, but I'd never trade the years of growth and experience I gained from that job for anything.

Answer 9

Well, I think you need to step back and try to find a happy medium here. Right off the bat two things popped into my head that you could consider.......one is look into being a teacher, who teaches video production in school either high school or college.......two is starting your own business where you do videos for special events for people, like weddings and things like that. I think you would be able to have a career in film but also have time for family, staying home even if you did the video production company I mentioned.

I think your parents are right, if you feel that being a stay at home mom is what you want, Full sail is not a good choice. That's a lot of money for a 21 month program.

Go to regent, get your degree, find your niche in the film industry that can offer you professional satisfaction as well as the leeway to achieve your personal goals.

Good luck, you sound like a very smart and mature 16 year old.

Answer 10

Ask yourself if you'll regret making the decision to start parenting at 16 years old. Every woman is given the gift of motherhood, be it 16 or 60.Its a long term commitment and doesn't really allow backing out once this commitment is made. I feel its probably too early to start motherhood at 16... I suggest you try out film making for a few years first. Film making is something that will take alot of your time and the best time to be in it would be during your youth, without a family to tie you down. you have a whole life to be an adult. Make use of the youth. Education before being a mum is good. at least you know you are capable to bring up and manage your family on your own coz you have the skills and ability to work .

If you are eligible for education, given the opportunity to learn, grab it! u'll never know when it'll come in handy.

I hope you have the wisdom in making this important decision!

Answer 11

I think that you should focus on your education first. There is plenty of time to be a mother and wife. Do you really want to just graduate and jump into the mom roll??? What about you and living your life. Even though being a mom is something you really want to do, if you give up on your dreams, you might start to regret and even resent your decision and possibly the children that you are "tied" to. They can't be put on hold once you have them. (don't take that the wrong way, I have 3 of my own and would do anything for them.) You said that you want to stay at home the first 5 years? if you get your education first, you could do that and not have to worry about running every where. YOur degree isn't going to go anywhere if you are staying at home, but the ability and desire to go to school might. You're only 16!!! Be a kid for a while. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate now, just relax and be a kid... You only get to be one once!!!