My husband, and my daughter, which is 15 are not getting along. the last episode, was 2 days ago he reminded her that she was not locking the door when she left for school in the mornings. She left the door open again the next day, and I said something to her (not a lot). Then this morning she when she left for school she left the door not only unlocked, but he said it was open. He is convinced she did it on purpose to prove she does what she wants. (now granted due to the thick tension between the two he has backed up from her) Now, would you say he is right, should I get behind him and discipline her. He unplugged her cable in her bedroom. Should I chill out and let her bear her punishment? (I know what is right I guess I just want some feed on it)
2007-11-16 04:21:16 · 13 answers · asked by Tamm 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
If it were my daughter, she'd have hell to pay. her actions are rude and disrespectful, as well as unsafe for your household. She needs to lose privilages and be made to see that she is wrong. until she gets it, no fun for her.
2007-11-16 04:26:19 · answer #1 · answered by Amanda Nicole 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
wow. 15 is such an awful year for girls (this should really be posted under Adolescent) - i didn't think i'd survive my girls going through that stage! If she's the last one to leave the house, then yes I would say she's doing it on purpose and is on a major power trip - yes, you should let her bear her punishment and back up your husband on this. My oldest was caught sneaking in and out of the house at that age (she locked her bedroom door & went out the bedroom window) - our solution?? We removed her bedroom door one day when she was at school. Teens like their privacy, so once that's gone they'll do about anything to get it back! You COULD tell her that if your front door is left open or unlocked again, she'll lose hers - eye for an eye, so to speak. I'm guessing it'll be locked from now on. ((wink)) Good luck!
2007-11-16 04:31:57 · answer #2 · answered by Flusterated 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The next time she does that I would take everything out of her room except a few of her clothes. and don't leave her favorites. Let her see what it would be like to be robbed. And then when she starts locking the door again give her a few items at a time back. also she should be respecting her father in his home. Discipline is the course I would take. I'm not that strict but I do demand the man who feeds,clothes and put a roof over my kids head get the up most respect
2007-11-16 04:42:44 · answer #3 · answered by cindyokie1 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Next time pretend to steal all the stuff in the house including hers, hide it somewhere. If she is disrespecting you, you are not wrong in punishing her. Have you asked her why she keeps leaving the door open? maybe she should get up earlier if she is in a rush. like 4 am... She might retaliate more but you are the parent. Yelling and screaming might not work, be a bit more respectful of how she feels. Maybe she did it not because she thinks she can do what ever she wants, but because she dislikes your husband. Try talking to her nicely and respectfully.
P.S. teenagers or any child that has hit puberty really has lost their minds. Half of their brain functions irregularly because it is growing. Particularly the function relating to decision making. was scientifically proven.
2007-11-16 06:03:26 · answer #4 · answered by Vivi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is dangerous. There could be someone in the house when she gets home from school. She has to lock the door. He is right. I don't know that she is doing it on purpose but regardless she should be punished. Wouldn't it be convenient for her to leave the door open and find some of her stuff missing?
2007-11-16 04:27:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
She should pay for her attitude along with I'm sorry but ignorance of leaving the door open I mean come on that isn't only her stuff that she is risking getting stolen but all of YOURS. She deserves anything she gets right now. I know your mom and you don't want her to suffer but sometimes children have to be taught a lesson and it's not like he is beating her taking her cable away is the least of the problems she would have if she acted like that at my house.
2007-11-16 04:32:03 · answer #6 · answered by teal_eyed_girl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she won't learn to keep the door locked I would lock her out for a while - but disconnecting the cable or taking away something else like ipod, cell phone etc. would work as well. The only advice I would give is do not ignore your daughter's actions as it will only escalate - she has to know that her actions have consequences. Good luck!!
2007-11-16 04:30:56 · answer #7 · answered by JDa 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Show your daughter who the parent is stop being her friend. Cut off her privileges. The problem with alot of parents they are to afraid to show some discipline. If she is misbehaving then she has to pay the consequences.
That is good that your husband took the cable out she needs to be grounded.
2007-11-16 04:37:18 · answer #8 · answered by Rosie T 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wait, is this the stepfather or biological father? It makes a difference. If it's her stepfather, well of COURSE she did it on purpose. It isn't the stepparent's responsibility or place to discipline stepchildren...it just doesn't work. If it's her stepfather, then YOU need to decide on discipline and yes, she does need to be disciplined for disrespectful behaviour. If it's her real dad, then he's within his right to unplug the cable and punish her. However, the two of you need to be on the same page and agree before any punishment is enforced.
2007-11-16 05:57:19 · answer #9 · answered by emrobs 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I had a rebellious stage and my parents threatened me with taking my tv, stereo, mobile phone and i pushed it til i lost everything but what finally made me stop was when they sarted ignoring me when i tried talkin to them. I would get a nod and hmmm every now and then so i knew how annoyed they were with me. either that or one night pretend to go out, but sit in the car or something and leave the door wide open. She will realise how uncomfortable it can make you!!!
2007-11-16 06:08:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She left the door open on purpose you and your hubby need to agree on punishments and stand by them. If you show a divided front she will exploit it.
2007-11-16 04:26:55 · answer #11 · answered by ziggy_brat 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋