he loved me last year, i didnt have feelings for him.
as soon as he started seeing another girl i realized how much i liked him and decided to tell him. he chose to stay with the other girl, afraid i'd hurt him again. recently hes been SAYING he has just realized hes still in love with me and that he cant continue his relationship with the other girl.
he wants me to do this: wait (ive already waited a month and a HALF) until hes so mean to her that SHE breaks up with him because he doesnt have the heart to break up with her. I'm so tired of waiting, if this guy's in love with me he'd just break up her NOW wouldnt he?!
(PS. i was devastated the day after we went out and he called me and said "...yeaaa ive decided to be with the other girl." it was TORTURE. and now im afraid he'll hurt me again. do i wait, or do i hit the road? i REALLY like this guy..)
2007-11-15 16:48:30 · 12 answers · asked by Vertigo 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
OH PLEASE, hahah LOL@homewrecker. He was mine FIRST, and knowing that we were supposed to go out the other girl got herself even more involved. If you don't know the definition of a homewrecker I would recommend www.dictionary.com sweetie ;)
2007-11-15 17:02:42 · update #1
Tsk3x The Youth of love.
2007-11-15 16:52:23 · answer #1 · answered by Bethuel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I am unhappy with my relationship, say if I feel neglected, taken for granted, etc, then I might just be toying with the fantasies of what I am missing. Talking to the other girl might excite me for a moment, while I ponder what it would be like if my girl were different. These sorts of things are signs of deeper problems, and the best way to face them is to recognize that and talk to your man about this behavior in a calm, compassionate manner, explaining that it makes you uncomfortable and why. The other thing to do is to ask yourself why it makes you uncomfortable. However, if I am really happy with my relationship, and everything is going really well, I might still flirt with some girls. The difference is, there is no real interest on my part, just a kind of game. Honestly, there is absolutely no reason that my girl should be jealous in this case. There is no excitement, no chemistry between me and the other girl. Rather, it is courteous and harmless, and in fact, every second I spend feigning interest in this girl reaffirms my longing for the girl I love. Its like if I see an ad for a burger when I am starving on my way home from work, and I know there is going to be a big, juicy, perfectly cooked steak at home waiting for me, the ad makes me hungry, but not for a burger. All it does is remind me of my steak, and why I love it so much.
2016-05-23 09:01:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been there before. My best advice to you is that if you really want to be with him then wait. But don't but your life on hold until he's ready for you.
I've been in a simular situation and believe me it took longer then a month more like a year.
However we got together been together for over two years married now with a baby on the way so good luck honey and don't give up on love.
2007-11-15 17:00:09 · answer #3 · answered by TeeTee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The most important thing is NOT to answer your question(s), but to examine what about you -- apparently -- is obsessed with what you can't have. This is VERY common, especially among girls, and VERY damaging. This kind of emotional reaction of wanting what you can't have can lead you into one mess after another. Before you do anything, you should seriously explore whether you have this kind of reaction. MAYBE NOT. Maybe that has nothing to do with it. But I think it DOES from what you describe. And the POSSIBILITY that you are reacting that way should be explored and dealt with before you do anything.
Such feelings may originate with feeling abandoned or not loved (NOTICE -- FEELING, not necessarily REALITY -- how you perceived it, truthfully or untruthfully) as a child or any number of things. This can cause you to over-react when affection seems to be taken away from you.
THAT SAID -- dating is only dating. It is a search. He has a right to find out who might be right for him, and so do you. Dating is NOT ownership. It is not marriage. So if he decides he would rather be with you, that's fine. If he decides he would rather be with her, that's his right.
So, because guys and girls have to go find out who they want to be with, you should not be surprised.
Focus on making him want to be with you. Be sweet, pleasant, fun, encouraging,e tc.
2007-11-15 17:08:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you got the answer already but you are not ready to accept it. If the guy have told you that he wants to be with the other girl, it is time for you to move on with your life. There is no pointing waiting for someone who don't even appreciate your love.
2007-11-15 23:56:00 · answer #5 · answered by Clown & Joker 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They have a name for people like you, it's called a homewrecker.
2007-11-15 16:53:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen to me dear why would you want to waist your time on someone whos involved in another woman your both going back and forth with who needs to be with who. Your going to get hurt I feel like you should make sure who he really wants to be with. Theres plenty of decent guys out here let him be with her and you move on It may seem hard to do but, think about yourself, your feelings. You don't have to commit to someone right away just get out and meet others.
Also, its wrong to be mean to someone just to break up with them to be with someone else whos to say he may do you the same way one day to get back with her or someone else. You end up deep in the relationship and he hurts you. Your going to have a hard time letting him go. Move on to better things and let him sort out who he wants to be with .
Don't waist your time trying to satisfy him look out for yourself.
2007-11-17 12:23:27 · answer #7 · answered by mrshllnthny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your not in love-Your in lust.
Do you know what love is? Look it up here...
Holy Bible
1 Corithians 13:4-10
2007-11-15 16:59:42 · answer #8 · answered by butterrum28 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's better u forget him
don't wait 4 such a guy.....better 2 move ahead without lookin @ him
AN ANS WHICH IS STRAIGHT BUT DOES NOT NEED OTHERS OPINION AS U ALREADY KNW ZI ANS WHILE WRITIN UR QUES ....BUT U WANT JUST 2 APPROVE IT
2007-11-15 17:01:17 · answer #9 · answered by shivvy g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your love doesnt exists. Its fake.
If you loved him, you wouldnt want him to break up with this another chick. Love = desire to see the loved happy
2007-11-15 17:02:03 · answer #10 · answered by pikesh p 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋