How to stay a virgin till marriage?

Question

So I'm a 20yo college student who has been going out with my first boyfriend for 4 months. We've made out, but haven't gone farther. I want to stay a virgin till I'm married, and he's very supportive and cool about that - doesn't pressure me at all. My concern is that I might get to be too tempted and change my mind before I get married, just because of hormones and not because it's the right thing to do. I've looked up a couple sites about staying a virgin till marriage, and most of their practical recommendations are useless to me. I.E., not being in a place alone with the other person - I do college homework every day at his place, and there aren't many other convenient places to do it. Or not doing anything more than a chaste kiss - I've already made out with him, and don't exactly plan to stop, although we are really careful that our relationship isn't primarily about making out. So, supposing I stay with this guy long-term, does anyone have any good tips?

Answer 1

Don't go anywhere alone with him unless you have your period.

Answer 2

Well, you have to ask yourself why it's important to you to wait. I think the not being alone with him is the best way. Look, I know you said that you do homework with him, but what's more important to you...doing homework together or staying a virgin until marriage? If you even think you'd be tempted while at his place, then by all means, don't go over there. It's really not that hard to wait. I know people can be tempted esp. when you're making out. Maybe you also need to stop that as well because it really can be hard to stop when you start kissing and making out. If you truly do want to remain a virgin until marriage, then you may have to make some sacrifices and they should be worth it in the end. It almost sounds like you want the easy way out and there may not be one.

Good luck and I think it's great that you want to wait by the way!

Answer 3

That's a toughy. First of all I commend your efforts. Now, take all of these factors into consideration. Don't go out and get drunk because all your inhibitions will go bye-bye. In fact, don't do drugs of any kind, okay. If you're really serious about it you won't get sidetracked by him. Focus on school. Don't get your head stuck in the clouds. Everytime you guys are together and things start getting hot, think of everything that could happen, You could get pregnant (then you'd have to go through child birth, that's always a good time), Your in college so if you have scholarships and you'd have to take a semester off from school. This might start you off in a bad chain of events and then, you might not even go back to school once you get pregnant. Then you would regret it for the rest of your life.

Oh and BTW, don't listen to those stupid ****** ******'s that are telling you to only go on a date with him when you're on your period. For one, you may think it's nasty but he might not, and two, you can still get pregnant on your period. Don't be stupid and regret these things for the rest of your life. just think of the consequences, stretch marks, child birth(which could last from a couple of hours to a couple of days), complications during child birth, you may think he's a good guy but you never know because you can't tell by looking whether or not he's got something. But, if all of that doesn't turn you off, and you guys do decide to do the deed. Make him get tested. I don't care if he told you before he met you he was going into preist hood or something. Don't let him hit it till he let's the health dept. stick it, if ya know what i mean. Oh, and even though you've never had sexual intercourse you might have something to. You might be a carrier of something and the reason you don't have symptoms is because of that fact. So, be safe not sorry.

Answer 4

Take lots of "breaks" if you're making out. Do activities that put space between you. It sounds dumb, but games like Scrabble, Uno, etc. you have to be on opposite sides of a table, and you have to use your brain for a little while. Go out in public often. Don't stay in together alone very long. If he's supportive, you can wait together and help each other when it gtes difficult. I was never a big fan of the "chaste kiss" either.

Answer 5

First of all you can't masturbate someone else. Masturbation means doing yourself. When you do it to someone else it's foreplay.

Like you said you don't want to be in a position where your hormones would take over and want to finish what you started. So ignore that advice.

The best way to stay a virgin till marriage is to only date insecure geeks who are afraid to hit on you.

Other than that I can't help you much.
I think virginity is over rated.
I don't think adults can maintain a long term relationship without a sexual bond. Without sex it's just freindship.
As long as you won't commit fully to a relationship you won't have to worry about staying with anyone long term.

Answer 6

Make sure he is very aware that you want to wait, so that if for some reason you give into temptation, he's strong enough to stop you. Also, perhaps make rules, like how far you'll go before you stop, maybe promise each other that cloths will stay on, or only tops can be removed etc.

Good luck. It takes strong will to wait.

Answer 7

Quit making excuses.Go tot he college library or public library to do your homework, or get some friends to join you.
Otherwise you KNOW what is going to happen as far as sex goes, bit not what comes afterwards.This is why it is important to not have sex until you are married.
Long -term is marriage, not shacking hon.ove without commitment is a relationship where one or both have one foot out the door.

Answer 8

Please don't listen to the people saying 'masturbation'. T_T It's good that he's supportive, but if that's not enough maybe you should do things to distract yourself if you get any "urges". (turn on the TV, go cook something, try talking about something totally unrelated...).

Also, I don't know if you're a Christian, but my pastor once gave me some good advice- 'If you think about the laws of God, and do not contemplate them, you will obey them.' Even if you're not Christian, you can translate that into your own terms.

~TWITCHY-chan♥

Answer 9

You just have to learn how to control your urges and make sure he knows when to stop if things get going a little too far.

Answer 10

Just say your not comfortable about having sex before marriage. and keep telling yourself that and every guy you date. If they pressure you to have sex