What should your parents have done differently when raising you?

Question

I think my parent should have instilled me with more self-esteem.

Answer 1

Self-esteem is something that nobody can "instill" in someone else. Self-esteem isn't instilled, which is a passive verb. It's not like rain that falls down on you. It's something you earn yourself, for yourself. Otherwise it wouldn't be "self" esteem. If you listen to what you're saying, it will make sense--you're saying, I wish my parents would have done something to make me regard myself highly. What is an example of something you think they could have done? The only thing I can think of that a parent can do to help with that is to have helped you identify age-appropriate things that would have challenged you in some way, that accepting and meeting the challenge would raise your confidence, and your regard for yourself (esteem). They could have encouraged you when you struggled with the challenges. But they can't "install" you with esteem for yourself. It's not possible. By YOUR doing things that test YOU in some way, YOU begin to see YOURSELF as worthy of YOUR own esteem because of YOUR effort and YOUR success. The GOOD NEWS is that you can do that for yourself at any time in your life. In fact, it's a life -ong developmental issue. So, go for it!

For me, I had low self-esteem until I was in my late 20s or early 30s. I had been very sheltered by my parents, so I had done nothing to give me confidence, or not done enough to feel good about myself and my place in the world. I struck out on my own and did things that I wasn't sure I would be able to do--I had always thought I was clumsy (low self-esteem), but I got a job as a waitress and did it very well! I finished college! Those things built my confidence, and I began to ESTEEM myself more highly. I got a job writing brochures, and the first time I did one, I felt so scared to show it to my boss. New area of work, no confidence in that area. I spent like TWO DAYS trying to perfect about 10 sentences (low confidence, low self-esteem). But then he liked it, and my confidence went up. I have pretty good self esteem now, from risking and succeeding. Does that help?

Answer 2

i have the same problem with you. my parents call me ugly & fat all the time [at least once a day] but alot of guys like me at school & all my friends say they r jealous of how skinny i am. so i really dont know what to believe. so self-esteem is deffinately an issue.

&im only 13 right now

Answer 3

I think my parents should have been better listeners and trusted in me more.

Answer 4

spent more time just hanging out,playing games and talking.

Answer 5

More self esteem, & beat my lil smart a#s more often
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1