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Some of my husband's family is coming to visit this Christmas. Our nephews and their parents are VERY messy. They bring out toys and don't put them away, they never make their bed, they don't put thier dishes in the dishwasher. I have to cook and clean up after my own children and family. I can't keep up with both. They just clutter every room and I try so hard to keep my house nice. The rest of the family that is visiting do just fine as houseguests.

And they do this at their house too. There, they have piles of food and laundry everywhere, it smells, and it has cockroaches everywhere. But they are very nice and are family. How can I get them to be neater while their here and get their kids to clean up after themselves without seeming like a rude hostess?

2007-11-15 11:18:46 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture Etiquette

8 answers

Just explain that everyone has to help. Let the kids know that there are no video games, T.V or other activities until the toys are put away. I have a few friends that bring their multitude of children over and at first, they would destroy my home and then leave. I decided that my kids did not need to be held accountable for other people's messes so I talked to the children and their parents. Whenever they come over now, the parents help with the kitchen while the children work together to keep the toys and things put away. If they can't respect your space then they should consider a hotel. It is your home and you make the rules. If you go to another country, you have to abide by their rules not the rules of your home country.

2007-11-15 11:26:11 · answer #1 · answered by MJ 6 · 2 0

It is hard to adults to tell what to do. I usually speak to the kids and ask for instance: would you mind putting the toys away when you are finished playing with them, and could you take your towels to the laundry room after your shower. And would you like to help me put the dishes in the dishwasher. This way the adults will get the hint

2007-11-15 11:36:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Yeah, I'm going to have to go with, suggest a nice nearby hotel. If they don't respect their own home enough not to be nasty in it, they certainly aren't going to respect yours that way. You can't teach them otherwise. Your nephews are a lost cause because their parents are enforcing their dirty living by living that way themselves. And it's just too late for the parents to learn something new. Don't let them bring you their roaches; you'll be trying to get rid of them forever.
You might feel like you are being rude by telling them this, but you really are not. Yo uare opening up your home for celebration of the holidays for family, and it is not fair to everyone else that they mess up the house for everyone, and you cannot enjoy yourself because you are stuck cleaning. You are not being rude to them, you are merely not letting them ruin the holiday for others.

2007-11-15 12:51:16 · answer #3 · answered by julz 7 · 0 0

It's your house and you can set the rules. Family or not, they are putting an excessive burden on you by not helping. Since you know they are slobs already, maybe a suggestion could be made that they stay at a nearby hotel. You cannot change their behavior. They obviously don't care about cleanliness.

2007-11-15 11:50:31 · answer #4 · answered by dawnb 7 · 1 0

In his mind, he thinks, there's noone coming, so i'll leave everything in a right mess, if he had a very important person calling, he would certainly clean up the mess, it's the mind you need to make friends with, and then the body will follow. Appeal to his better side, mother him if need be, not to over the top though, it may take a bit of time, 'Rome' wasn't built in a day".

2016-05-23 08:07:48 · answer #5 · answered by diann 3 · 0 0

Presumbly first visit ? Dont invite them again . Dont allow a self invite . If they insist write them a letter saying they were to messy if they say they have improved dont believe them once a messer always a messer

2007-11-16 00:51:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

do you know they can bring cockroaches with them? in their luggage. Tell your husband if he wants his sloppy family here he can clean up after them..or better yet, a hotel room would be more suitable for these people. dont put up with it.!!!

2007-11-15 11:50:22 · answer #7 · answered by Winters child 6 · 0 0

confront them in a nice way about it or suggest a really nice hotel....in short its hard becuz either way it may sd rude but if you don't it won't change.....when people are nasty thats just there way

2007-11-15 11:32:51 · answer #8 · answered by just4fun 3 · 0 0

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