THis is my first real relationship and Im really scared so I have been getting mad at him for everything like Im trying to scare him away. He has been talking about moving in together soon and getting married in a few years but Im not even close to that right now. What should I do?!!! I dont know if hes the one.
2007-11-15 11:01:52 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Im 19 years old
2007-11-15 11:07:15 · update #1
I've actually been in his shoes at one point in my life; I wanted the fairytale thing, and she wanted to party (please don't take offense to that). The relationship ended so badly, and it was mostly because we didn't try to communicate and be honest with each other about what we wanted.
The best thing to do for BOTH of you is to sit down and have a serious talk. The worst thing you can do at this point is to not say anything and go along with it. For you, you're going to be in a situation you're not ready for, and may grow to resent him. For him, he'll be living a lie he doesn't even know is one, and no one deserves that. Talk it out, and tell him that you're not ready. It's going to hurt, but it'll sting a lot less now, than say five years from now, and you've both wasted precious time in a relationship that wasn't meant to be.
If you're getting mad at him a lot now, I'd say the resentment may be already starting. You may want to sit back and ask yourself, "Why am I mad at him all the time?". If it's legitimate reasons, (like he's a slob, unromantic, plays video games all the time, etc...) you may want to try to work on them, but if just being around the guy sets you off, or that flame of passion you had for him has just died out, you may have your answer about what you may need to do.
Just sit him down, and talk about where you want to be, what you're expecting out of the relationship, all of that. It's scary, but you'd be surprised how much easier taking the next step is once you get everything out in the open.
Hope that helps!
2007-11-15 11:26:31 · answer #1 · answered by DeMarcus Y 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him u need some time to think everything over! Let him know that he is moving to fast and ur still young and really don't know what u want right now. If he really loves u and respects u he will listen and understend ur needs! Good Luck!
2007-11-15 11:06:39 · answer #2 · answered by Tashay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him how you feel its going to be hard but you have to. unless you want him to talk about stuff like that. =P if i was in your position i would tell him that he's moving too fast =/ tell him you're not ready to talk about this stuff. he might misunderstand so you have to be careful and explain exactly not editting but EXACTLY how you feel..something like you luv him but you're just not ready.. that's the best i can offer sorry ><" good luck!
2007-11-15 11:06:54 · answer #3 · answered by ♪~♦ Eternal Stream ♦~♫ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
whoa!!! that's a big problem well you're 19 do you love him? if you do talk 2 him and make clear the diferences between you and him.
2007-11-15 11:10:45 · answer #4 · answered by House m.d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
God! you could at least tell ur age! Well i say just say that u can't do that because you ain't ready.... it is harsh, but you have 2 do it
2007-11-15 11:05:24 · answer #5 · answered by drew_f@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the please please tell him --- for any relationship to work long or short term you must talk to each other --- sit down and tell him --- he is serious enough to wait until you are sure about what you want ---- best wishes
2007-11-15 11:07:24 · answer #6 · answered by Waterdragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell him how u feel...dont be too worried about what could happen...just tell him
2007-11-15 11:05:02 · answer #7 · answered by {[mAdNeSs]} 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him you'd like to take it slower
2007-11-15 11:04:32 · answer #8 · answered by Rav 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋