So this guy and I are 4 years apart....my parents refuse to let me be with anyone older than me. I really like this guy, and I know he would never try anything. He's starting to like me too, and I think he's going to ask me out.....I know the age difference is kind of extreme but this is really common in my area...I know that's not an excuse; just thought I'd throw it in. Anyway, is there any way to be with him and not let my parents in on it?
2007-11-15 09:43:27 · 23 answers · asked by TenorQueen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
ok, just a few things:
1. I do not appreciate your sarcasm.
2. He doesn't know how my parents feel about it.
3. He and I have known each other well for about 2 years, and I know everything(yes, everything) about his past relationships. He's never done anything and he refuses to until he's married.
Just a couple things to bear in mind.
2007-11-15 10:00:30 · update #1
Ohhh this guy must be a keeper - he is willing to sneak around with you and lie to your parents - wow! Marry him tomorrow!
2007-11-15 09:46:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You're in a tough spot... but sweetie, the best policy is honesty all around. I think first, you should let him know how your parents feel about you going out with older guys. If you both feel like you still want to try dating, I think you need to tell your parents up front. They will appreciate that you are mature enough to tell them the truth. If you lie and they find out, they will be very upset, they might feel their trust was betrayed, and you probably won't like the consequences of that. You could try breaking the news to them together (you and your guy)... that way they can see he's a descent guy, and it'll give them an opportunity to ask any questions which will help ease their concerns about an older guy taking their daughter out. But if you decide to talk to them yourself, make sure you can answer their questions about him (which I know seem silly, but all parents ask them!)... like if he drives, that he has a valid licence and insurance, if you're gonna go out at night, where you're going, when you'll be home, and that you're not gonna be drinking or doing drugs, etc... Parents like reassurance. They like knowing they can trust you. And if you're honest and trustworthy with them with this guy, it'll open a few more doors for you when it comes to dating other guys in the future. GOOD LUCK!
2007-11-15 15:40:14 · answer #2 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Parents have best interest of their child at heart, so think about it.
Find a Good time to talk to them, if he asks you out. Let him meet your parent, do not say any thing about the age.
Four years is not a big difference.
But I do not know if you are old enough.
He can go to jail just for being with you if you are under 16 and your parents press charges.
Read my article on the subject.
***************************************
General Advice to Young People
By
Minootoo
This is my general advice to all.
You sound very young and if you are under 25, then study hard if in school or college, stay and finish it. Or join a school or college, acquire higher education.
Avoid distraction while studying at home or at school, just concentrate on the thing that you do at the time you are doing.
Build a carrier, youth comes but once take full advantage of it. Study hard, play some enjoy friendship, and then at age 30 if still unattached then try the sites like.
yahoo.shadii.com
jivansathii.com
2007-11-15 10:04:23 · answer #3 · answered by minootoo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are old enough around 18 or 20 then its okay you can make your own decisions and go out with him. But if you are younger then be careful there are all sorts of cray people out there.
Talking about age difference 4 years is not too much at all. Girls of a particular age are highly mature than guys of same age. The maturity level of a guy & a gal matches if the guy is few years older than the girl. Wait till your parents marry you off, they will certainly marry you to a guy atleast 3 years older. i.e if you go for the traditional arranged marriage.
2007-11-15 14:15:08 · answer #4 · answered by yashQAme 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well the age difference is not bad at all. I mean I am dating a guy that is 3 years older then me. So what. My parents don't even know about it. Well, you could say that you're going out with some friends and really go and meet him somewhere. Or you could just tell them how you really feel about him and hope that they will listen. You never know. I wish you the best of luck.
2007-11-15 09:48:00 · answer #5 · answered by criswellmary 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well maybe you shouldn't be dating if you can even let your parents know. But a good first date would be with friends and your girl at the movies and maybe the mall.
2016-05-23 07:50:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it depends on how old you are. Try it for a while if you really, really like him. Don't actually date. Just "hang out". If you still feel like he is perfect and does not try anything, tell your parents that you have found someone that is perfect for you and go from there.
2007-11-15 09:50:39 · answer #7 · answered by tombombadilpwns 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he is interested enough to ask you out ,then he has one thing on his mind and it isnt marriage hon.It is using the knowledge that you have the hots for him to get into your panties.
Next, your parents will eventually find out, and it'd be bad if they found out because of date rape.Unless you have known him for a whole yr talking to him and interacting with him his family ,your family, then you know NOTHING but what he wants you to see hon.
Listen to your parents on this one.
2007-11-15 09:48:46 · answer #8 · answered by Joe F 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I had a bf and we were 4 years apart too. What you can do is delete all phone calls from him and make sure your not talking to him on the phone/computer when your parents are around. If you want to see him meet up somewhere like movies or mall.
2007-11-15 09:47:31 · answer #9 · answered by xo cAnDii ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
i kno that this is hard but im kinda in the same situation but what i would do is just have kind of a heart to heart with my mom and then c how it may work just catch her on one of her calm nights thats what i do but since you dont want your parents to know i wouldnt go to far out of my way but i do know that lying to them isnt a good idea because trust me parents find out EVERYTHING!!
2007-11-15 09:48:34 · answer #10 · answered by erika_danielle 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dated my first boyfriend for 4 months before he broke up with me. My mother forbid me to get back with him or see him. So, when he begged me back, we got back together and dated for 2yrs. We still hung out and saw each other. The only bad thing is I lied to my mom all the time so I could be with him. So technically, I dont think its worth it.
2007-11-15 09:47:38 · answer #11 · answered by solelone 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋