Anyone belong to an adoption support group?

Question

I am currently searching for my bios. Everything I keep reading stresses the importance of attending adoption support groups. I think it's a great idea. Anyone have stories or experiences to share?

Answer 1

I was searching, and like you, reading that support groups are important. I finally decided I should check one out. I only found one group in my area. It's open to birth mothers, adoptive parents, and adoptees. I've never seen an adoptive parent at the group. The first few times I went, I was the only adoptee. But since then, adoptees are just as prevalent as birth mothers. (Only once has there been another male in the room, though.)

My group has been invaluable to me. Being with people who are going through, or have gone through, some of the same kinds of things I am has been really important to my own mental health. Just the ability to hear others' feelings and experiences, and share my own has been really comforting.

My group only meets once a month, though, and that has been difficult, especially since the past few months have seen a lot of major events happen (most notably my first meeting with my birth mother!). The group just isn't frequent enough for me. So I have found online support, too. The face to face meetings are important to me. But the frequency of the online world is also important.

I think just having a safe place to discuss all the different things I've felt has been invaluable. I hope you can find that sort of support. Search and reunion can be crazy-making, and it's nice to have people who can go through it with you.

Answer 2

I attend an adoptee support group here in Australia every 2 months. There are a couple of first mums that also attend. They're casual events, over coffee and cake.
I've found them very fulfilling - hearing all the different stories. It's an amazing thing to find others saying things that closely relate to how I feel - as for most of my life I knew no others with the same feelings - and those that aren't adopted will so often belittle an adoptee's existence. (often without knowing that they're doing so)

I am involved with the adoptee blogging community online - and with a couple of support forums on the internet. Again - I've found them to be a great help and support for all the ups and downs that reunion issues bring up.
To have your feelings affirmed and for others to say - 'yeah - I've felt like that - no you're not crazy' - is a great thing to have!!!

Here's a great adoptee forum on the internet -
http://www.adultadoptees.org/forum/index.php

Here is a list of many adoptee blogs -
http://www.adultadoptees.org/forum/index.php?topic=2805.0

I hope you find a group that you feel comfortable with.

Answer 3

Never been to an adoptee support group though I did attempt a "birth mother" support group a few times. Bunk deal there, all they did was try to make us feel like we had made the best, least selfish and loving choice, nothing even close to healing. Now I am wanting to look for an adoptee one though! Sounds like a good idea.

Answer 4

I belong to one and love it. I've been in reunion for three years and I think it's very important to have support from those who have been there. Whether that be online or in person doesn't really make a difference - just as long as you have it. Searching brought out emotions in me that I never knew existed. Even though I feel fairly grounded in my reunion I still go to offer support to others.

Answer 5

actually never heard of one and frankly i am fine dont' need one maybe years ago would have been nice but not now. take care.