Can you follow a religion you don't believe in?

Question

I was raised Christian...I am now atheist, as I have been for the last 8 years. However, I still find Christian rituals rather comforting, and I believe that if I were to have a family, I would want to bring my children up with some faith. I, myself, cannot believe, but I can appreciate the faith of others.

Is this wrong if no one else knows about my lack of belief? Do you think this would cause any real long-term problems?

Answer 1

You can still celebrate Christmas...it's just called X-mas if you're an atheist.

Answer 2

Why would you want to continue rituals that you don't believe in? What a waste of time. Create your own rituals that hold meaning to you, even if you take some of the traditions from Christianity that may mean something to you now to create them.

I think perhaps you should look more deeply within yourself to figure out what you truly believe and what caused you to lose your faith - as why else would you want your children to grow up with some faith?

Answer 3

Religion is such a touchy topic. I personally believe in the Lord, but I also realize that some do not. To be an open, and honest person is the best policy. IF you have children, how you raise them, is all up to you. You can have an open religion system. Let them learn your way, let them learn other ways, and then they can have a foundation and knowledge of many different religions or the option of no religion.
As far as it pertains to you...I wonder, how do you feel about concealing the real you? It is what makes you an individual, and you can accept what you are, and others should as well. I don't believe it will hurt in the long run, but if people are really to appreciate you, and what you are about, they have to know the real you.

Answer 4

I can't, but I know some people can.

While I was struggling with my Christianity, of those I could discretely enquire at my evangelical bible-believing church,
I discovered that about a third did not believe, but spoke and acted as though they did in order to preserve their place in community, fellowship, which was the thing they truly valued and could not face losing.

As others have mentioned, ritual and ceremony, irrespective of its actual theological content, is appealing to many.
(hence the objections to the loss of the Latin Mass: for some it was better when they *couldn't* understand it!)

I can't say words I don't mean, or perform rituals I don't believe in, and so had to leave the congregation when I became an atheist.
But I think I understand the veiwpoints of those who stayed. If the rituals are only rituals, why not enjoy them *as such*. Especially if, through long exposure, they have become "old friends."

What you should teach your children, however, might require some thought. Is it "love of ritual" you wish them to acquire?
Or for them to believe something that you don't at core think is true? You'll have to get your own mind clear if you don't want to just pass on confusing mixed messages.

Answer 5

As an atheist, I find christian rituals ridiculous--you seem to be doing this out of habit. I don't quite understand how an atheist can get comfort from that--but, whatever floats your boat, I guess.
I will say that I had my children baptised in a Catholic church and did have them attend religious instruction for two years each, in first and second grade, until they made their first communion. I did this because, although baptism didn't matter to me, maybe one day it would matter to them or to someone they were in love with. And I wanted them to get some religious training because I know they are living in a society where over 95% of the people claim to believe in a god. They weren't going to get this stuff from me. But it was very hard for me, having to go along with the stories and sit through the masses and rituals they made us take part in. At this point, they're intelligent young men in their early 20's, and neither believes in a god.

Answer 6

wow - this has received a lot of responses - here's my two cents - I know what I believe in - and I don't attend services in any building or with other people. And I started doing this before my children were born. I did take them to church, several different churches because I felt it was important for them to have some basis to form their own beliefs. I know people who celebrate Christmas - not as the birth of Christ and not as x-mas but as a celebration of family, and some basis in the old celebration on the longest night of the year. I don't think taking your children to a church or different churches is being a hypocrite, because in reality how do we really know there really is or is not a god? calling yourself a christian and treating people like sh - t is being a hypocrite
If you can feel ok about taking your kids to a church being an atheist, then I'd say go for it. I completely get wanting to give your children the chance to believe in something even if you don't.
Just because someone is an atheist doesn't mean they are a bad person or that they go around doing bad things. There are many people out there who think it's ok to go out and rob or rape and then go to church on Sunday and ask for forgiveness and that makes it all ok - that's crap.
And then there are people who never go to church, but do believe in a god; and some athiests who wouldn't think of killing a fly much less hurt another human being because they respect life.

Answer 7

indeed it would cause some long term problems...especially for your children... if they see you acting like a hypocrite then they Will also... this will lead to using deception in all areas of their lives... I have seen this effect many time in many families where family practices do not match the "Sunday face".... no one not of The Church can sustain, full time, the false profession of faith... it comes out...one way or another... and children especially are able to see it... and your own most certainly will...

btw... no one can be "raised a Christian" you may have been raised by genuine ones of The True Christian Faith...I have no way of knowing that... but your own words make it clear you never were of The Faith... yes...you may fake it... many do... but you, and your children, will reap the penalties for the deception eventually...

If you would like to re-explore The Faith I invite you to my website... it may give you some basic info that could get you started on a more in depth study... http://www.mikesfaith.com

Answer 8

Do whatever feels good for you. Only real long term problems would be if you raise your children religious and then reveal to them you don't believe in what you teach them.
I'm not religious, but I still enjoy doing all the catholic rituals when going to a wedding such as the crossing and reciting different hymns or prayers.

Answer 9

It could cause problems between you and a future spouse and how to raise your children. So you would have to marry someone, (if you get married), who has similar religious or atheist ideas.
I am saying that I respect your beliefs, that's between you and God or whatever you believe in. I cannot judge you.
Just as long as you don't become bitter. Many people lose or turn away from their faith in Christianity, and turn out to become very bitter people when life starts knocking them around.
Good Luck to you in whatever you decide to do !

Answer 10

I do the same thing. it is not necessarily Christian rituals, it's more family tradition. There is nothing wrong with not telling your family how you feel, because it would probably upset them more than you realize. However, they will likely find out if you ever have children because you will not be taking them to Church and everything. For now, continue following family tradition, but don't upset your parents and grandparents by telling them how you feel.

Answer 11

you don't believe but you find the rituals comforting, then theres a little something in you that wants to believe, what you should be asking yourself is if you'll raise your children as atheists, the concept of non existence beyond this life can cause them psycological problems.