My son has just turned 4 and wont eat dinner.?

Question

He wont eat anything remotely like a dinner even if we bribe him. He says he doesnt want it. When we ask if hes hungry he says yes but wants a choco spread or jam sandwich. Cereal is also on his wish liost but he refuses to eat proper food that we know he likes like sausages, noodles etc

Answer 1

My son now 6 went through a phase like that , no matter what we would try he would not eat it. Even his fave foods he would once eat, he would barely touch. Cereal and sandwiches was all he would eat. I got so concerned about it I spoke to my health visitor and she told me most go through that stage to not make a fuss and as long as he is eating something it is fine. The more fuss you make the more they won't do it. So I stuck to what she said and it never lasted that long really he now eats all kinds. At one time he wouldn't try new things either and now will try whatever I give him. So don't worry or stress too much I'm sure he will out grow it, funny thing is now my 3 yr old has started it. ( not this again lol)

Answer 2

No worries. Wait it out. It's medically proven that they will be fine. Resiliant little beings! Let him not eat or give in, either way it's not a battle worth fighting. I used to say if you don't want my dinner, make your own. At 4 he can do choco spread and jam. If you give it to him at other times of the day, then you're telling him it is healthy food. If I was him I wouldn't understand either why it's okay sometimes and not others. Kids are people too :-) I don't like eating things other people like sometimes, do you?

Answer 3

Kids always want the goodie type foods! We do too if we just admit it to ourselves. I'd much rather have choco spread or a jam sandwich than roast beef! LOL It's just that as adults, we know we can't be healthy eating that way. Kids don't get that.

One thing that helps with both of my kids (even now), is I give them a choice when I'm making dinner. Do you want mac and cheese, or do you want potatoes? Do you want hotdogs or hamburgers? Do you want green beans or peas? I always name the foods I was thinking of using anyway -- but I found that if I give them a choice, they feel like they have more say in what their meal consists of and so they're more willing to eat it. And yet the meal is still healthy and easy to fix. Giving kids even small choices can make them feel empowered and make them more cooperative all around.

AND; once a week (on a weekend day), I let them choose what we have for dinner completely (they alternate weeks, son picks one week, daughter picks the next). It could be pizza, or french toast, or pancakes or whatever they want -- even peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. The only rule is it can't be ice cream or candy or snacks, etc. It has to be a regular food -- but they have a lot of choices in that category that appeals to them. And we make it together which adds to the fun. Lots of times we just have breakfast for dinner because they want cereal or french toast or whatever. It's all still healthy and those nights end up being the best of fun! And again, it gives the kids a choice which makes them feel more in control of their lives which in turn makes them more cooperative at meals the rest of the week. As they've gotten older, our menus have expanded for that one day a week "together" meal as they come up with more "grown up" tastes. And it's a wonderful time for us to bond and be together since the week seems so hectic with activities. Maybe starting up a tradition like this now with your son so young would really be good for both of you.

Answer 4

It's ok....don't worry, this is perfectly normal. He isn't going to STARVE but I wouldn't fill him up on whole milk every day either he COULD develop a lactose intolerance. Or if he prefers drinking his meals then mix it like a milkshake for him - add some additional nutrition and calories to it - in a blender with a banana or apple, ice, orange juice like an Orange Julius (without the egg!), or an Instant Breakfast packet. My 4 kids went through this also at repeated times in their little lives. Just offer him small amounts of good, nutritional food choices through out the day but don't try to force it or fret about it if he isn't EATING on any particular day. He isn't going to become malnourished or anything! Trust me! Just try and make his choices look interesting and never resort to giving him empty, fatty, highly nutritious foods - which is an easy pit to fall into.... just make him small bite sized plates of food at each meal along with something nutritional to drink and IN TIME he will become a normal eater. I PROMISE! : ) Don't get yourself all upset about it or at HIM - he's just being a normal little 1 year old and this behavior is perfectly ok and normal too. Just be patient, creative and it will be fine as he gets a little older and REQUIRES more calories. Trust me - when he IS HUNGRY he will eat.... eventually he'll be eating you out of house & home! : ) LOL

Answer 5

This is a control thing.
Give him a choise-eat what the family is eating for dinner, or go hungry. Don't worry that he will starve, but he will begin to understand that A) He's not the boss of you, B) When he makes choices, the result may not work out to his advantage,
C) You are not above letting him suffer the consequences of his choices.
The trick here is to always include something he really likes with dinner or for desert, but he doesn't get to have any of it until he finishes the rest of his dinner. (But don't overload the portions. Remember a little goes a long way in a 4year old tummey!)
Be firm, once you draw the line in the sand, stick by your decision-Remember YOU are the parent!
This is the trick I used to get my kid to eat (& now she likes!)
Spinach, broccoli, brussle sprouts, green beans carrot, etc.

Answer 6

I went through the same thing, here's some things that I tried, Don't call it dinner, call it snack time, whatever is served for dinner, that's what he gets, don't make substitutions and if he's not going to eat take some priveliges away like treats or tv time and don't give in until he has eaten an acceptable amount. Kids are not going to starve themselves and don't forget who the boss is, they don't run the show! Also limit snacks and treats during the afternoon so he is hungry at dinner time!

Answer 7

Your son is just testing his boundaries. If he is hungry enough he will eat.

If it really worries you that much try this. Instead of asking him what he wants for dinner come up with a choice such as "Would you like chicken noodle soup or pork chops for dinner tonight" that will make him feel like he has more control. Also try taking him with you to the store and letting him help you choose the ingredients and let him help you cook the food. If he is more involved he will be more likely to eat it.

Try using the food to make a face on his plate and ask him to "eat the mouth" "eat the hair" etc.

You can also try doing something fun and unexpected like having breakfast for dinner one night. Food with fun names like "Pigs in a blanket"

Pretty much anything to make dinner fun and exciting will help to get your son to eat it.

As long as he isn't losing weight or is sickly he will probably be fine if he picks at his dinner and like I said first once he gets hungry enough he will eat.

Answer 8

hi my daughter is also 4 and tried this with me. i nipped it in the bud straight away the same way my nan did with me. its simple
1) no snacks (accept 1 piece of fruit between meals)
2) sit at the table to eat your meal
3) he does not leave the table until he eats his dinner (when you Finnish your dinner have your pudding when you meal is complete he can leave the table)
4) if he does not eat his food. NO food until breakfast. (this may sound harsh but after a couple of days of going to bed hungry he will eat his food. it will not hurt him to go to bed hungry)
5) if he eats his food (or makes a good effort to eat most of it) give him a good pudding like ice cream as a reward.

you may find this hard (my wife did) but stick to it and don't falter. it works and the rewards are great. hope this helps. harry

Answer 9

you're the adult. you need to tell him what he needs to eat.
& if he absolutely refuses to eat what you made for dinner,
so be it.
eventually he'll get hungry and will be forced to eat it.
i'm not saying that you should starve your kid,
i'm just saying that at times like these a little tough love is needed.
don't give in to him because then he'll think he can get away with anything and he'll never have to eat supper
show him who's the parent
and who's the child.

Answer 10

If me and my sister didnt eat our tea, it was re served for breakfast, lunch and tea again until it was eaten. Its not that he doesnt like the food you want him to eat, He just knows that if he doesnt eat you will give him something yummier! Dont feed him anything else, no snacks nothing. He will soon learn that its your way or go hungry!