I have been dating my current girlfriend for about 7 weeks but we were friends before that for about 5 years.
My grandmother died last night and the funeral is on Saturday in Atlanta (we live in Tampa, FL).
She has the whole weekend off, and I think I would like her to be there but I am confused.
Should I take her to the funeral, or no?
On the one hand, I know that I want something long term with her, and she feels the same, and I think this would bring us closer overall.
On the other hand, she isn't going to know anyone and I'm not sure if it is too soon to emmerse her in something of this magnitude.
What do you think??
2007-11-15 04:11:36 · 21 answers · asked by TopherM 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
P.S., the girl I am dating has already met my mom and dad several times from the time we have been friends, but she never met my grandmother.
2007-11-15 04:24:13 · update #1
just take her
2007-11-15 04:14:59 · answer #1 · answered by DC all day moniemonie1234 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask her if she wants to come with you, but say you'll understand if she thinks it's too soon for something like that (ie, don't make it sound like you NEED her there so she feels pressured into saying yes)... if she feels up to meeting your family under such circumstances and being there to support you, then great. She's probably thought about it, and if you haven't already brought the subject up with her, might be wondering why not. If things are getting serious between you two already, she might want to be there for you, especially given how long you were friends before you started dating... the two of you should discuss it, I'm sure you'll work out what's best. It might be a bit of an awkward circumstance to meet family members under for the first time, but I think you should at least give her the opportunity to decide whether she's willing to put up with that awkwardness or not. Just make sure that if she does go with you, she doesn't end up feeling awkward and excluded - don't leave her alone with a load of strangers for long periods of time, for example!
Sorry about your grandmother...
2007-11-15 04:23:24 · answer #2 · answered by marmiteontoast 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It might be too soon for this, but you have been friends for so long, you have to think about it this way, if the rolls were reversed would you think it was too soon for you to accompany her? Or would you want to be there for her as a friend and a supporter in her grief? If you would then you should ask her to be there for you. It really depends on what the friendship was like before you got together I guess.
2007-11-15 04:19:09 · answer #3 · answered by greeni707 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally I think you should take her, after all she's been your friend for a long time too, I think she would like to be there with you in this moment. She won't know anyone, but you'll introduce her, and she will like shes a very big part of your life.
2007-11-15 04:21:23 · answer #4 · answered by Sue 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you've been close to her for that long, and your family wouldn't mind, and if she wants to go, go ahead and take her. She could be there to be supportive to you. If someone has a problem with you bringing her, don't bring her. A funeral is the wrong place for bad feelings.
2007-11-15 04:19:50 · answer #5 · answered by Erin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you need her support and I think you should take her! Your all she needs to know and I know its gonna be odd but If you see long term with her everyone will have to get to know her eventually! I know bad timing but this can also show you what kind of support she will be to you!! Sorry for your lose! Good luck!
2007-11-15 04:17:02 · answer #6 · answered by one_redneckmom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i usually just answer questions to screw around, but this is serious. here's the deal unless she has met the family before in your 5 year friendship then No, it's way to soon unless you are commited to a long term realationship with her. then she would be introduced as your fiance
2007-11-15 04:20:18 · answer #7 · answered by freakinjokers_serious 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Defiantly go for it! You have known her along time and I think it would bring you closer together. You sound like you need her to be there and it would be special. Let you family know and let her know that she is welcomed there! Good Luck and my condolences.
2007-11-15 04:17:13 · answer #8 · answered by MadKat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it would be fine to take her. You're right, it would bring you closer together (There is a whole Seinfeld episode about this). Ask her if she wants to go, and see what she says.
2007-11-19 03:05:31 · answer #9 · answered by Jack 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take her for support becuz if she is willing to go and support you then you should take her. It takes a real partner to go and stand beside you and support you...Just think about..Cuz when my grandpa died my ex was there with me and it was the best support I could have.
2007-11-15 04:19:32 · answer #10 · answered by T.N.M. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her all this and ask her. I think it's sweet and you could probably use the company. Besides there will probably be lots of people there who don't know a lot of other people there.
2007-11-15 04:16:48 · answer #11 · answered by aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋