My 54 year old mom passed away from Cervical Cancer this past August. The holidays are approaching, and I am so depressed. How do I handle the holidays without her? I have a 7 year old and a 16 year old. What suggestions do you have?
2007-11-15 02:17:49 · 14 answers · asked by Rmb2000 1 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Cancer
Don't try to do it the way you always have. It won't work this year. Make everything as simple as possible and get the families support on this. Perhaps it could be a time to reminisce about the good times with mom, to cry, laugh, hug each other. It is like the elephant in the room. Everyone knows it's there but avoids talking about it. It just doesn't work.
2007-11-17 03:59:14 · answer #1 · answered by Simmi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My mom passed away to two years ago and the first holidays were rough. My mother always made a big Italian dinner for Christmas, so I have my family over and continue the tradition. We are doing it again this year. There is really nothing to do, but try to remember all the good/funny memories.
2007-11-15 02:22:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
My wife passed away a year ago September from cancer. I did my best to keep things as normal as possible. Had the gathering at our house with the kids and grand-kids, bought gifts, made food, etc. After I made the mandatory effort, I went to my room and layed down and took a nap (I was not tired, but I was depressed). May not be a good suggestioon, but it is how I dealt with the day.
2007-11-15 07:30:50 · answer #3 · answered by Randy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. I understand what you are feeling, my sister passed away unexpectedly in August. Make some special new traditions that honor your mother's memory. Make special ornaments with your kids to remember grandma. It might be too hard to carry on some of the traditions you shared with your mother, so don't feel bad if you can't face doing some of the things you always used to do with her. I am buying a present that my sister would have liked and donating it to Star of Hope. Also, dwell on what you do have to be grateful for - family members, good health, etc. You have my deepest sympathy.
2007-11-15 02:33:14 · answer #4 · answered by Pam H 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i'm sorry on your loss, yet you're able to bypass, for the reason which you promised your mom. i know that's annoying yet look interior the brightside. in line with probability your stepdads GF is fairly valuable, you in no way know. And merely remember on an identical time as your there you're mom would be smiling down on you. i would be unable to furnish you precisely the advice you opt for so I recommend asking God. Praying could make any difficulty greater desirable. God consistently is conscious what you're able to do. So merely grin and undergo it. that's only at some point :)
2016-09-29 07:09:33 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be strong, my brother passed away just before the holidays 2 yrs ago in october. it was very hard to deal with but i tried to be strong and to be honest this will be my first yr since he died that i will accutualy celebrate a holiday, it's not easy i just rented movies and ordered dinner at olive garden and did not have to worry about too much attention or reminders that he was not there anymore......this year was when i accepted he is gone and he will not come back just think about the great memories and last don't shut your family out they need you as much as you need them sometimes talking about the good old days helps. take care........
2007-11-15 02:30:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
My 60 year old mum pasted away sept 7 after a 4 month battle with kidney cancer. It was such a shock and so quick and i know how you feel. I feel empty, im 29 and thought Mum would be here for so much longer. Contact me if you need support. xx
2007-11-15 08:45:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's rough. My mother died a year ago in Sept from a botched D&C... she had just found out that she had uterine cancer. I don't remember how I made it thru, but I did. I do know that my birthday was the worst tho.... it fell on Mother's Day this year. I wish you luck and strength on your journey of healing from your loss, it is a long hard one, but it does get better eventually!
2007-11-16 03:24:43 · answer #8 · answered by b_jayne_s 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. My prayers are for you and your family during the holiday season. I know its hardest losing a loved one around the holidays. My Grandma died in 2001, 3 weeks before my 17th birthday. I miss her very much. The holidays were hard for me, not getting a Christmas card from her, or hearing her voice, all excited about it. She loved the holidays! I still miss her today and I've found that just thinking about the good things helps alot. Also having family around, and sharing memories is great. My cousin likes to tell stories about her, things I don't know, but I like it, cause it helps me to remember her. They're not dead till you make them dead. My Grandma told me that when my Greatgrandpa died in 1994. Its true. And I know from my husband, just time, patience, and understanding are healers too. He lost his dad that Thanksgiving my Grandma died. 2001 royally sucked for us. You'll get through it, but give yourself time, and don't hold it in, cause that will make things worse.
2007-11-15 02:34:02 · answer #9 · answered by Crazy 4 Cats! 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It'll be very sad, but you have to stay strong for the kids. Do something special for your mom. Take a wreath or a tree out to the cemetary. For my dad, we bought a very small tree and decorated it. It was only about 12 inches tall, but it was big enough to put small ornaments on. We took it out to the cemetary and yes, it did make us feel better. I know that its hard but with time, it does get easier. Of course, their never forgotten, it just gets easier.
2007-11-15 02:29:18 · answer #10 · answered by pebbles 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋