What am i meant to do i am in love with my best friend ?

Question

He says hed never leave his wife or kids until the kids were 16 which i fully understand !i think he feels the same way . When we are together its like every thing else is invisible !He changed my life so much . And helped me get through some really tough stuff . I cant help how i feel and i am trying to ignore it but it is hurting so much please help this is so hard

Answer 1

You need to break contact with him. It will be hard, but if you care for the kids, you need to break it off. You don't want to be the third person in a relationship, cause you will be the one that is hurt. He has the best of two worlds, his wife whenever he wants her and you on the side. You are the other person, and the one that needs to break it off, because he won't until his wife finds out, and she will.

Answer 2

Honey...people only cheat on their spouses for one reason. Revenge. If the marriage was really over they'd have separated and filed for a divorce long before he ever gave you a second look.
When married folk play it both ways it's basically because the cheater wants to pay their spouse back for some neglect or offense they feel they've suffered. They use their lover to punish their spouse and when the lover is also the spouse's friend...revenge is all the sweeter.
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And the problem with this revenge is...the spouse has to find out about the affair in order to be punished or paid back.
Oh, the cheater will swear they are only cheating because of an major attraction to their lover, that they would never want their spouse & kids to find out, etc. etc. But that's just the denial they use to avoid having to admitt to themselves what kind of a cruel, self-centered, selfish, self-serving person they are.
Sooner or later, however, the cheater WILL "slip up" and their spouse & children will find out.
They always do and YOU will carry just as much blame for the heart ache they will feel as he does.
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Honey, the world is full of single men. Find your one and marry him. Someone who's not a cheater.
Once a cheater... always a cheater.
If he'd do it to his wife, he'll do it to you.
And yes....you can help how you feel, you're an adult, right?
What you should be feeling towards this guy is anger not lust. Angry that he's doing this to his family and using you to do it...his wife's former best friend.
And make no mistake...she is your FORMER best friend now if you've had sex with her husband.
For the sake of your own self respect, quietly remove yourself from the lives of this family. You probably weren't his 1st affair and you won't be his last. Sooner or later she will find out what kind of man he is, but with any luck she & the children won't find out about your affair with him.

Answer 3

Ask and make sure of what ur feeling are ,i mean u have to ask him or even give a hint if ur sure about what u feel towards him and am sure as he is ur friend since long time he will definetly understand ....I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say.Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. Sometimes it might be too late and u might lose them ..... And that will hurt you much moreee ..