I don't know what he is thinking. I don't know how to communicate with him. When I got married to him, I thought it is in his nature to be just quiet but as yrs have gone by, he doesn't really say what he feels. I have to ask him and that doesn't guarantee he will say what he feels.
But I know he is thinking but what? At times, he does talk about work but that's about it and nothing else. I have sat down and stressed to him that it is important for spouses to talk and communicate to each other. Sometimes, I try being quiet to see if he initiates any conversation with me but he just doesn't. It is one word or 2 with my daughters or me.
I know I am very good listener. People come to me with their problems but it is the total opposite for my husband. Becoz he doesn't communicate much, I am afraid that he might do something behind my back . Am I being overly sensitive? Serious advise, please.
2007-11-14 13:38:48 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
People don't change once you marry them...You seem to of known what you were getting. If you can, try to explain your need for more verbal contact to him.
2007-11-14 13:42:10 · answer #1 · answered by CherryCheri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I had an answer. I've been going through the exact same thing w/ my husband. It's hard not being able to communicate w/ your husband w/o pressing for it. I fear the same thing about him becoming secretive. In fact, when he gets stressed, he does things behind my back. I of course catch him and feel totally crushed and betrayed. I feel like if I can't trust him w/ little things, what happens if something big happens? I think it's especially difficult if your home w/ little ones all day, no adult communication and he gets a chance to interact w/ other adults throughout the day. By the time he gets home, he just wants to veg out. It's really hard. Unfortunately, none of the answers here are of much help, are they? Perhaps counseling is what is needed. I'm thinking that but not sure how to approach my husband. Good luck.
2007-11-15 11:59:23 · answer #2 · answered by MoonPie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
most people don't change after they get married, if at all the get worse in their behavior, so you kinda knew what you were getting into. Its just whether or not you can live with it or not. Maybe marriage counseling is in order, you guys really need to communicate though.
2007-11-14 21:47:44 · answer #3 · answered by Mary L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you read the book "Men are from mars,Women are from Venus" it might help you understand how guys think compared to women.This book helped me tons.He does sound very quiet for sure.Hopefully this will give you some ideas.Good luck to you both .
2007-11-14 21:47:58 · answer #4 · answered by sasyone 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my hubby is the same way, dont worry about it, if he has something you need to know he will tell you. There are things in my hubby's body language that tell me what is going on with him, and he has little things that tell me all I need to know, Hmmmm usually means yes, if it is no I am usually informed of that with actual words. Just enjoy the times he talks, dont push, they tend to withdraw more when pushed. I hope this helps.
2007-11-14 21:45:01 · answer #5 · answered by Crystal K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My hubby is like that too. I have 15 minutes when he gets home to relate the news of the day, then it is off to read his papers, etc. It doesn't matter to me, because if need be, he will take over whatever is necessary and I know he loves me.
2007-11-14 21:46:16 · answer #6 · answered by kny390 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should talk to his bestfriend and ask if your husband is quiet w/him, also observe how your husband is with his family, he could just be going through something and doesnt know how to talk about it just yet.
2007-11-14 21:45:42 · answer #7 · answered by Kiki from K-town 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your saying that he was like this efore you got married and yrs later its all the same, then it just sounds like its his personality, i wouldnt worry, people deal with things in there own way...
2007-11-14 21:44:20 · answer #8 · answered by Lily B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did you marry him in the first place!! Maybe he just has something on his mind. If he won't tell you the first time get him drunk and see if he spills the beans!!!!!
2007-11-14 21:43:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
my dad is the same way. but he was raised like that. to just not talk about emotions and feelings and stuff. maybe he has just been like that for so long he doesnt know HOW to open up
2007-11-14 21:42:50 · answer #10 · answered by bnkay27 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋