The guy im in love with is having issues so were not talking right now..his best friend called me because were all friends from way back..so his friend ask me how me and him are doing and I give him the scoop on it all..me and my guy have been off and on for awhile ..his friend tells me that my guy is just afraid and i said why and he said because i have said all the right things and have done all the right things and that makes my guy scared..so in return my guy wants to let it go and run..wtf?? does anyone understand this..they are best friends for like 25yrs so he knows him more than anyone but still ..if a person did and was everything you wanted..then wouldn't that mean you would want to be with them?
2007-11-14 10:32:58 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The fact his friend is calling you and telling u this is soooo immature. He should be a man and be handling this himself.
2007-11-14 10:38:16 · answer #1 · answered by YUMMY1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You would think so but some people are afraid of being in love. His fear could be that he is not good enough for you,
that he is not ready to commit to your, that he cannot support
you $$$ or emotionally, or that he will not measure up to
your standards...these are pressures he may be putting upon
himself and the main one: when in love most people feel
out of control and they LIKE &NEED control. It is scary one
guy told me being in love with me was like being on a
roller coaster he wanted on so bad then he felt powerless
that I could walk away and leave him devastated.
Sorry this is not an easy thing to deal with common sense
does not always kick in when in love. Be patient and not
push at this tender time. You can be brave and talk to him
and tell him what you need from him or how you can be there
for him if he needs support now.
Good luck. Oh and Phil Collins wrote the song
"I love you ...but I just can't take this.." oh of course
he sent a FAX to tell his wife his marriage was over. oops!!
2007-11-14 18:41:21 · answer #2 · answered by WiseGal 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl, U got 2 move on. Dis friendboy aint ready fo U. Sounds like he into himself an want the benefits wit no committment in return. run while U can an be happy enjoyin da things U likes 2 do. Stop bein a floor mat fo some guy who is low down an a smooth talker!!!!!
2007-11-14 18:40:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
no matter what age you are or where you are in your life...if your not ready to commit then your going to run from anyone and anything....you could be his one and only..but the commitment issue gets in the way and his true love doesn't mean as much as before.....its nothing against you even though it may seem that way..he just needs to work on his issues....i wouldn't listen to his bf no matter how long they have been friends...you need to talk to you guy. hope everything works out for you
2007-11-14 18:45:47 · answer #4 · answered by adrik c 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not necessarily! There is a time and a place for everything, and maybe he's just not ready to get into a heavy-duty relationship like he thinks you'd like to be in. If it's not the right time in his life to get involved with someone, then he's not going to want it, no matter how perfect you are for him. Just keep in touch with him as a friend for now and wait for him to have that devine moment when he realizes that he wants you in his life.
2007-11-14 19:10:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is afraid if he commits to you, he will never have another girlfriend again. It really doesnt make sense but it makes sense to him in his head. He is deathly afraid of only being with just you. You need to help him through it and let him know you are there for him. Also tell him that nobody will treat him better than you.
2007-11-14 18:42:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it depends on the person and their past. If he's been hurt badly, or grew up in a home where his folks had issues (like multiple marriages, affairs, or fought a lot), it may make him gun shy. If you love him be patient. And if your relationship doesn't have the communication skills to discuss it with him, is it a relationship you really want?
2007-11-14 18:37:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
ummm how oldis your guys? could this be middle age crisis? feeling like this is all there is to life, i know it is not raltional, but hey, it happens to guys to. maybe get some better advise from a dr about it. Don't heed to much on what his friend is saying. If you seriously want to find out, talk to your guy, if that don't work try a dr.
2007-11-14 18:37:58 · answer #8 · answered by do.drop 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, you would think so, but people with low self-esteem issues don't think they deserve to be treated good. If you were a real b**** he probably would talk about how mean you are but love you to death. Leave him alone and if it was meant to be then he'll eventually get it if you're still interested.
Good Luck!
2007-11-14 18:38:50 · answer #9 · answered by peaches6 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe as he gets older he's fighting it because he's gotten to use to the way things are. He can't handle the 'real' thing. You need to give him a nice ultimatum because he'll continue to fight what's good for him if you don't.
2007-11-14 18:42:50 · answer #10 · answered by Mona 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋