Guys, I need your opinion on this one....is he over-reacting or was I wrong?

Question

Ladies you can answer also....

I was on the phone with my love today, and well I was just telling him about how this guy tried to get my number and told the guy no but I would take his. Now I also told my guy that I didn't even have my phone with me and that I was just saying it to get the guy out of my face which is the ABSOLUTE truth. It's not like I told him, "I gave this hot guy my number today", I was just telling him how persistent the guy was. Anyway, now he thinks I go around taking guys numbers and call them, I told him I wasn't and he was just like whatever. my question is this,

Should I just have kept what I thought was casual conversation to myself OR is my guy over-reacting.

We are at a stage where we are trying to avoid conflict, but if I am not wrong I will just let this pass.

Answer 1

He is over-reacting but you played a role too. You thought it would be fun to make him alittle jealous too know that guys hit on you and then he completely blew up. Women always find ways to remind their man that they're still desired by other men. We all do it! We like tha attention.The most common thing is dressing real sexy when you and your boyfriend go out. <----This is a better way of going about the situation. By doing so, other guys stare at you the whole night. And this reminds your boyfriend how hot you are and that he better work twice as hard to keep you. It kinda makes you feel sexy and a little cocky at the same time. But the truth is most men already know this. But they don't want to hear about it from you either. In their mind, if your telling them about how guys are always hitting on you and your getting their numbers....it's makes him think that you like the attention, (which you do).But it also makes him think that you are trying to be in relationship (happily) and still trying to play single on the side.
What you were really looking for is an reaction out of him. Even though you meant no harm by it.

I can't tell you how many boyfriends I've pissed off by telling him a boring story about how some lame guy tried to get my number. So sometimes you just gotta watch what you share with him. And they're are plenty of ways to playfully make them alittle jealous. But flat out telling them about another guy is never a good way!

Answer 2

not only should u have kept this to yourself but it shouldnt have happened, by that i mean u should have told the guy u were not interested and had a boyfriend and as far as this guy being persistant grow a backbone speak the truth [to the guy asking for your number, and im not saying lie to boyfriend] and if that fails tell the guy asking for your number to leave u the hell alone if he persists, Dont u think the conversation between your boyfriend and u would have gone much better if it had gone something like this. this guy came up to me today and kept asking for my number i told him i was already with you and he didnt want to give up so i told him to get the hell away from me and leave me alone, if he bothers me again would you have a word with him. you would have had a much better outcome and your boyfriend wouldnt be questioning in his mind if he can trust u or not. start using your brain or keep your mouth shut a lot of people confess things like this cause they feel guilty for not doing the right thing and the only thing u do when u confess things like this if nothing is really going on is to make yourself feel better and salve your conscience, you dont take others numbers if u have no intention of calling them, hasnt a guy ever taken your number and not called and by doing this u didnt stop this u just make someone more persistant than if u had said u were not interested in the first place and sent him on his way and told him to leave u alone if he wants to be a jerk and not take no for an answer

Answer 3

I think that it's fine that you told him, because atleast now he knows that you wouldnt hide something like that from him and you were being honest, and obviously werent interested in this guy if you were tlaking so casually about it, if you really had done something wrong you woulda tried to cover it up or not have said anything at all so i definately see how it was casual conversation. At the same time i can see where hes coming from because if you were in his position and found out that he had accepted another girls number, wouldnt you be upset? it may seem to him as though you taking this guy's number may have been leading this guy on, or flirting with him, and no one likes the idea of their bf or gf flirting with or getting hit on by someone. I think that you should talk things out and althought it might become a bit of an argument, atleat itll be a little bump you guys can get over and allow you guys to get closer, and get to know eachother better. i definately understand that you want to avoid conflict but if you just let this one be, there is a chance another situation like this might come up again, and if it isnt resolved now than it may worsen the next time. good luck :)

Answer 4

I guess I can see how he might get some negative ideas from that conversation. Maybe he would get the feeling that you're trying to rub it in his face that other guys want you. Maybe he would think it was just some lame excuse for taking this guy's number that you're making because you have a guilty conscience. Hard to say since I don't know either of you and wasn't a party to the conversation.

As an aside, one other strategy for guys who won't lay off and keep bugging you for your number after you tell them you're seeing someone is to just write some number besides yours. (I read one time about a phone number that was set up for that purpose and played a recording that said basically "You thought I'd give you my real number? Yeah right.") I'm not normally in favour of such cruel measures, if someone doesn't respect the fact that you are already in a relationship, he deserves it.

Answer 5

You were wrong to take the guys number. You should have just told him no and let it go at that. What he is thinking is what else do you do just to get people out of your face. Giving a man your number or taking his is not casual conversation. When you don't want to do something stand up for yourself and do not be bullied into doing it.

Answer 6

Keep in mind that if a *guy* asked this question - he would be told by all the women here:

[1] don't take other people's numbers - it means you have intentions of contacting them. The real way to give someone the brush-off is to say "no one is taking anyone's number here. good-bye!"

and

[2] if a guy withholds information, he is a sneaky sonofab*tch. If a woman does it, she "has to in order to spare his feelings."

So, [1] stop taking guy's numbers -- it means you are interested in them, and [2] don't lie to your mate, and [3] you were kind of stupid to take a guy's number. he is not over-reacting.


Try this: assume he walks in and says "this girl wanted my number today. she would not give up. she persisted. so I took hers to make her go away.

you know what you'd say? "You cheating bastard! Call her then you want to talk to her so much! Oh, you want a sandwich? Call that little sl*t and have her make you a sandwich! How could you take a woman's number? How could you do that?"

And so on.

Answer 7

Did you bring it to the attention of yur lover because you want to be honest or because you are looking for a reaction?
Honesty is always the best policy. I'm sure it made you feel good to get some notice from someone else. Maybe you told him because you were happy with the fact that other people find you attractive, and possibly to get a reaction. If you both are in love you need to be secure as a couple.

Answer 8

Yes I do think your guy is overreacting and that he needs to trust what you say if you guys want a healthy and successful relationship. You cant avoid conflict but you can prevent them. Does your bf have trust issues? Does he have trust issues bc he is "bitter" from a previous relationship? If so you should try to understand where he is coming from and dont tell him stuff like that. What was the point in even telling him that? how is that relevant or any benefit to your relationship. I dont know if you were just trying to get a reaction out of him or what but you guys shouldnt sweat the small stuff or break up and move on. Learn the dislikes and likes of your partner and make each other happy! hope things work out =)

Answer 9

yes you will learn over time and with age that there are something you cant tell the other reason being just that. i did that once in a casual conversation and i never heard the end of that for years.. thats was just plane wasted time and thoughts for us both. its not that its right or wrong.. some people have trust issues and thats just another thing they grab on to.. i never said anything like that again what a man might say to me or not. it wasnt important anyway what a man might say to me. lol unless its something bad lol.. if you take my advice it would be not to say things that you might not think are important but might be something that upsets him. i would just keep it to myself.. you wouldnt want him coming home and telling you about some girl doing that would you and then get you thinking more into it then there is. good luck

Answer 10

Learn that no matter how much you want to share everything with "your guy", don't do it. Keep some things to yourself and just smile because you know some guy still wants to get your number. But there isn't a rule out there which says you have to say everything that happened to you everyday to your guy. Honestly, I'm surprised he heard you because most guys filter about 99% of the jibber-jabber that comes out of their gals mouth on a regular basis.