My husband has lied about contact with other women.?

Question

Since the beginning of the year I found out that my husband has been in contact with an old girlfriend. I use the term girlfriend loosely, but you get the idea. Anyway, there was a plan in play for the two of them to meet again after many years. It did not happen. When I found out about it I was upset and confronted him. I resorted to snopping thru email to figure out what exactly was going on. We did go to marriage councling and everything was going well. Until 2 months ago he left his email open one day and I saw mail from her. He denied it until I told him I saw it. He admitted but assured me it was nothing to worry about. I told him it is not the fact that you are in contact with her but that you have neglected to tell me, again. Well just a couple weeks ago I grew suspicious/noosy and went thru his email and found more communication between them. She wants him to meet her. I called him out and a huge arguemant took place. I was wrong to go into his mail, but why can't he be truthfu

Answer 1

Sounds like he is a cheater, and you are going to eventually get hurt. Tell him that you are tired of trying to hold a marriage together when he is continually planning a rendezvous with someone else. Tell it that he either straightens up or you are leaving. By the way, file for spousal support, and get everything you can out of him. He deserves it for breaking his vows.

Answer 2

How old are you and your husband? You the two sound.. kinda of immature. no longer attempting to be advise. particularly. yet why might he stay with a woman buddy once you 2 have been having issues? that should have been a pink flag precise there. He had NO guy pals he ought to stay with? Even procuring a inn could have been greater helpful then putting a guy with marital issues on my own at night with a woman. possibly that itself is your answer. despite the fact that in case you needed time aside why might he circulate directly to a diverse lady. to despite the fact that if or to no longer believe her? I type of do. She in elementary terms messaged you given which you pissed her off by using speaking crap approximately her. maximum suitable revenge may be to truly hit you the place it hurts. in the experience that your husband replaced into prepared to call her until eventually now whilst he knew he replaced into harmless than why no longer now? appears like your marriage is possibly already over. The believe is shattered the two way. He can swear up and down all day long that it's not real and despite the fact that in case you return to believe it you will continuously ask your self and it will difficulty you horribly. I conform to look at telephone documents. If he replaced into only residing together with her then that they had have no reason to speak or textual content textile consistently.. the place as though they have been being intimate and close they might.

Answer 3

you was not wrong to do that for one reason and that is because he lied to you already and you caught him in it. hes the one that put the doubt in your head and heart so that is his consequence.. had he not been being sneaky about all this then you wouldnt of know something wasnt right.. so he brought it to your attention not you just looking for it. it sounds like hes starting to get an emotional attachment to her or he would stop writing her and she might be getting attached to him also.. for you to trust him again you need to tell him hes got to be a open book to you.. he cant get mad everytime you check on him or call him and or follow him to see what hes doing.. hes got to be willing to do that if it was me to prove that there talks are over. if he cant do that then you can bet that hes doing more then he wants you to know about.. other wise there would not be a good reason why you couldnt do that.. then once your feel hes being truthful you can give him more rope.. i would say the same thing if it was a women doing that to a man.. either or dont matter to me.. good luck.

Answer 4

well, sorry to have to say this but your hubby is a liar.
should you have gone through his mail... absolutely. and you want to know something else. he left if open for you to find.

here is what you can do.... fake going out. get all dressed up and just leave. don't tell him where your going just go. come home in about 6 hours. go to a show or to dinner and a show. go shopping go to the library... just go... when he asks where you have been be evasive....
if he starts pushing, tell him you are not going to tell him just like he has not been up front with you...

been there done that. this worked for me.

good luck.

Answer 5

I'm not a huge Dr. Phil fan, but I do love this quote from him : "People with nothing to hide, hide nothing". If he's not being open and honest with you, especially when it's something that's been discussed previously, so he knows the boundaries, then you seriously need to think about if this is a situation you want to live with again and again and again.
Good luck!

Answer 6

He seems determined to carry on secretly with this woman. Whether or not, any meetings have taken place, how can you be sure? He's already proven himself a liar and then he wants to try to put you on the defensive for following up on your suspicions.

He has broken the bonds of trust and apparently he does not take them very seriously or he doesn't care. If it were me, I think I would show him the door and soon he will find out whether or not carrying on with someone else is worth it or not.

Answer 7

sweetie you are beating a DEAD horse. apparently they want each other and you are in the way. his is not going to stop communication with her so you need to decide if this is something that you can live with, because eventually they will meet and he will cheat with her on you. so stop worrying about him and what he is doing and focus on yourself and getting yourself together and in a position to take care of self and kids if he leaves you tomorrow. stop looking for stuff you already know whats going on, so there is no need to keep snooping and confronting him. confront yourself with the harsh reality that he wants to be with her and what are you going to do about yourself in this position. GodBless

Answer 8

It is not wrong to go through his mail when he gives you reasons to believe that he is lying. I would not tolerate this. The first time maybe but he has lied to your twice more. What else has he lied to you about that you just never found out about? If I were in your shoes I would be packing his things and he could go see her.

Answer 9

wish i could answer that one for you but i would still be Leary after the 1st time when you went in to counseling . men say things just to get done with that stuff sooner . they have what i call tunnel hearing goes in one ear and out the other .
and agreed once a cheater

Answer 10

This is going to be hard to believe but I know first hand that sometimes people talk on e-mail and make plans and never really have any REAL intentions on going thru with it. Honestly, it's true. I sometimes myself play on the e-mail with people only because it's fun and exciting but I never would really go thru with any of the things I say. It's just a little drama in my life that makes things exciting...if you guys aren't having any other trouble he is probably just playing.