about 5 months ago (PLEASE dont judge u did not know the situation) and now the guy im with now whats to try to have kids. I dont know if i should tell him that i had one or not. He is totally against it and i dont know if he would look at me different. Does he have to know? Or should i just keep it inside forever?
2007-11-13 14:40:02 · 31 answers · asked by :) 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
No he does not have to know but if he loves you then he will accept what you done in the past but the past is the past.
2007-11-13 16:18:43 · answer #1 · answered by ஐ♥Julian'sMommy♥ஐ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not keep it a secret. It will eat you up inside. Also, if you only had the abortion 5 months ago and are now with someone new that is too soon to be thinking about having kids with him. Give it at least a year before you even think about having kids with him.
2007-11-13 14:45:21 · answer #2 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
It's up to you if you want to tell him or not. You shouldn't have to if it was a really bad situation. However, "the guy I'm with" doesn't sound very serious and since you've only been with him for five months, don't have kids with him. Wait until you are married or have at least known this guy for 5 years. A lot changes in that amount of time. Everything seems perfect now, but just wait.
2007-11-13 14:45:36 · answer #3 · answered by Precious 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
First off don't listen to that first idiot. Secondly. . .. I would like to know your situation to why you had an abortion. I mean that was only 5 months ago and now this guy your with wants to have kids. That leads me to believe that you have been with him less then 5 months. It's not very wise to start having babies with someone you have only with with for less then a year or even less then 2 years. Does he have to know? No, but you'd probably feel better telling him. And telling him why you done it. If he loves you he will understand. . . unless of course if it was his baby then I HIGHLY doubt that he will. Good Luck
2007-11-13 14:49:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hun you made a choice and yes I can say in my opinion it was a bad one but you are the one who has to decide that for yourself. You do not want to have any secrets with this person if you want to have a serious relationship with them. Secrets will destroy it and quick. You are not gonna agree with each other all the time and maybe now you will understand that the choice you made was a bad one but that is not for us to judge. You just need to know if you wasnt ready for a baby 5 mths ago why would you be now. GL
2007-11-13 14:48:14 · answer #5 · answered by mom2wyo. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your boyfriend is against It I personally wouldnt tell him. It's a very private thing. You do not have to reveal your past to anyone.. even a potential husband. Although I don't think youve been with him long enough to reveal this to him. What you did is your own business ,and noone has a right to judge you and you should not have to justify to him why you did it. It's a painful secret that if you want to talk to someone make it a counselor, and get there opinion.He could look at you differant for it. If you really feel the need to tell him , you could feel him out a little and say your friend had one and why. See what he says, you may have your answer then. Best to you.
(and dont pay attention to the idiot who has to state there uneducated dum *** opinion)
2007-11-13 14:58:49 · answer #6 · answered by mom of 2 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
well it was only 5 month ago, so that mean that u haven't been with ur man that long I think I would wait at least another 6 months before even trying for kids. The I would tell him the truth It would hurt him worse if he found out later. GOOD LUCK!!!
2007-11-13 14:46:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't keep it inside forever. Tell him if you feel the need to. He doesn't have to know, but if it's something you want to be honest about than do so. If he judges you because of it than he doesn't really care for you. Do what feels right.
2007-11-13 14:44:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
he doesnt have to know and though it is said it is harder to get preg. after having an abortion...let me tell you from personal experience and people around me that it is very possible.
you dont have to tell him and now may not be the best time but i would tell him eventually, you will feel a lot better after you tell him and explain the situation if he loves you im sure you guys can get through it.
2007-11-13 14:45:56 · answer #9 · answered by just here to talk 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you had an abortion 5 months ago, but your readyNOW??
you have to be SURE you wnat to have kids, and do yu trust this guy to have kids with hime? tell him, and if he still wants to get married and THEN talk about kids.
trust me you don't want to have any unnecessary babies daddies. hold old are you by the way. why dont you focus on your education and career first and traveling, living life, cuz once you have kids.... it makes all the rest more difficult to acheive.
2007-11-13 14:51:38 · answer #10 · answered by Ms.M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IM me, I'm on...I've been there, kinda. I can help
but I want you to know that you have NOTHING to be ashamed of. You had that procedure done for a reason!
I would wait until you (and he) is ready to know about it. I'm not saying lie about it. tell him at some point in time, but not until you are both ready. secrets are never good, but some need a certain time and place.
also, are YOU ready for a kid now? What is 5 months, really? why was a kid not good 5 months ago, but it is now?
make sure YOU are ready and are the TWO of you ready and stable in your life now?
don't listen to these people who don't understand your situation!
2007-11-13 14:54:57 · answer #11 · answered by ur a Dee Dee Dee 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋