I have a guy friend who tells me what other guys say about me. Apparently, I look like a girl who's easy, stupid, and naive. I don't wear slutty clothing or anything like that, in fact you'd barely ever catch me wearing anything besides jeans.
For some reason I give off the impression that I'm one of...'those' girls... you know what I mean? That you typically see in a high school, caught up in their own superficial lives?
In reality I'm really quiet and nerdy and I really don't have very many friends at all because I just don't seem to get along with people my age.
Is it a bad thing that I give off the appearance of stupidity? Should my personality correspond with how others view me?
2007-11-13 14:17:26 · 5 answers · asked by Mushaboom. 4 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
first off I am sure you wear the clothes you are comfortable in, so that much shouldn't change. Second, from what you describe your appearance probably gets people's attention, and the nerdy and quiet side is probably what will keep people around. So in short I say nothing wrong with any of it.
2007-11-13 14:26:05 · answer #1 · answered by chrigity 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes the way we present ourselves sends a different message than the one we intend. If you are concerned, you might want to really look at "why" others might perceive you this way.
What is it about your appearance that gives off this vibe? Are your jeans tight? Are your tops clingy or show skin? Do you wear lots of makeup? Or maybe it's your behaviour... do you flirt? Some people will openly touch others during conversation and others receive this as flirtatious. Do you lack self confidence (which can easily be interpreted as naive or less intelligent). The list goes on...
There's no reason to look nerdy because you feel nerdy. But you're obviously not happy with the way others perceive you. Perhaps you could adjust the way you present yourself, so that you send the right message... one that matches the one you want to send.
Whether we like it or not, the way we look says something about us, because in reality, we are "choosing" to send a particular message through our choices in clothes, makeup (or lack of), etc. and the way we act.
If you don't want to adjust your look to match the message you want to send, then that's great too. But you need to make peace with yourself and promise yourself not to be concerned with what others think, otherwise it will eat at you and just not be worth it.
To answer your question, "Should my personality correspond with how others view me?"... I'd like to reword that and say that the message you WANT to send, should correspond with the message being sent.
Take care... and love yourself.
2007-11-13 22:33:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Some changes must be made; first, your so called friends. the next ones will be simple.
2007-11-13 22:29:11 · answer #3 · answered by Bob H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think later on in life you will find yourself and notice how these guys you are friends with now where really hormonal driven nerds.
2007-11-13 22:26:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
um its not bad. it doesn't matter what people say. let them think what they want. you know who you really and that's all that matters.
2007-11-13 22:27:50 · answer #5 · answered by melanie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋