I have had no contact with either her or my child in 9 years, the child is turning 10 next month. Now I am being charged with a child support order that is also charging me with retroactive support as well as future payments. I am on the birth certificate as the father, but now I question that considering her actions. Do I have a legal right to end this order?
2007-11-12 21:32:08 · 26 answers · asked by J.R. 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have had no contact with either her or my child since she left 9 years ago, the child is turning 10 next month. She left me and took our child without even so much as giving me a hint about it. Now just recently (7 months) I have been served with a child support order that is also charging me with retroactive support as well as future payments. I am on the birth certificate as the father, but now I question that considering her actions. I am not a deadbeat dad, I just really want to be in that childs life if indeed it is mine. I tried to petition for custody 9 years ago and the judge told me that my name on the birth certificate was not enough to grant me parental rights. I am very confused and I am considering hiring a lawyer. Why now after all this time should I be held responsible for something that was out of my control? Please help.
2007-11-13 01:00:13 · update #1
I have not had contact with her because she did not leave me any contact info. I have spent alot of money trying to locate her as well, and I cannot find her. I am not a deadbeat dad, actually the opposite, I want to be a part of his life.
2007-11-13 01:04:59 · update #2
If this child is yours, you could end up having to pay child support. Have a test done to determine if this child is yours if you question that. If you are getting an attorney, you may be able to get out of back payments if she just left and gave you no way to contact her and therefore you didn't have this child in your life as you wanted.
2007-11-18 10:34:33 · answer #1 · answered by Simmi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me first say that I'm very sorry to hear about your situation. Next I would advise that you seek counsel to find out what your all your available options are. In many situations you may be able to contest the order under the fact that the child may or may not be yours. You as the father can still request a DNA test in order to be sure. Be sure to mention that the child was taken with out your knowledge and until that time you were financially supporting the mother. As well, be prepared to start paying on the order and once you do, you may be able to get the mother's contact information. Next file for visitation by way of any relatives who may know her whereabouts. Finally, give the courts as much information as possible, because a deadbeat dad would not go Through the trouble of being cooperative. Hope the best for you and your child.
2007-11-18 11:31:08 · answer #2 · answered by yp_vasi_gwynn_oak 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all I am really disappointed in the quality of answers you have received to this point. The reason is, if you were sitting in an attorney's office there would be two questions before any advice is given.
They would be:
1. Have you actually received a support order or is this a letter from Child Support of PR informing you that an action will be initiated in the child's favor, and;
2. if there is an existing order, did the mother receive it in PR or a state in the U.S.
Until those answers are know, telling you to get a DNA test, is premature. Without those answers we don't even know if you have given up your right to further paternity determination or, at what stage of the process this is at.
EDITED BASED ON RESPONSE:
Is what you were given a COURT ORDER or an order from Child services and if the latter, how long ago did you receive it.
You have the right to file an answer and demand a paternity test unless you have ignored previous letters and/or summons in which case, you are in default and there was a judicial and/or administrative determination of paternity.
That's why I ask questions. The answers are important.
2007-11-12 23:22:43 · answer #3 · answered by hexeliebe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you can be held liable. But there are 2 very important points to take notice of. 1. You have to pay for future support. 2. The mother has to prove that the child still is on your name and that she tried to contact you to try get maintanance for the child. If she can not prove this through court documents then she is barking up the wrong tree. She also has to give you access to the child at least one week end a month and 2 holidays a year. Another fact to concider is if she has remarried at all. Speak to a lawyer and mention these points. You should have no problem. Just remember that if the child is yours you have a moral obligation towards this child as he never asked to be put in this situation. Good luck.
2007-11-12 21:43:15 · answer #4 · answered by Charles Athole M 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you can prove that you are not the biological father, you can beat this order. Otherwise, you've been a DEADBEAT DAD, and you should be held responsible for half the cost of the child's past , current and future costs of care until the child reaches the age of majority.
If you want to be a part of his life then what's the issue? Go to court with a lawyer and demand your rights! Regardless of how much money you've spent TRYING to find your ex, the resolution lies in going to court and hammering out an arrangement that best suits the childs needs. It's not about you or your ex.
2007-11-12 21:38:22 · answer #5 · answered by Feeling new @ 42 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Oh well honey I hope that your not in Florida because if your name is on the birth certificate your going to go trough hell trying to get out of this one and in the state of Florida if your register your self as the father guess what? YOU ARE....
especially if your sign the birth certificate then you really screwed because you gave up your rights to ask for a D.N.A test and the rights to be represented by an lawyer for a hearing on DNA test.. Now in most states your going to have to proof this is not your child so until you do your going to have to pay..and child support is hard on people everywhere good luck to you..
2007-11-12 23:33:08 · answer #6 · answered by boricua_2290 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are responsible for the child regardless on whether you have seen her or not. Why have you not been paying till now? I agree there are many women who refuse to let dads see their children but still happily take their cash, and I think that is wrong and the mothers should be dealt with but a father should still should support his child. Wed or unwed, when you slept together, it took the two of you to make that baby, so should be the two of you raising it, seperatley or together. You could possibly get a court order to gain access to the child but questions would be asked why it has taken you so long.
2007-11-12 21:42:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Give the money to the kid instead of a lawyer because you won't win. The law is very clear in this matter and it all boils down to one thing........your dad no matter the motive. You might get lucky and the judge might reduce the retroactive amount, but keep in mind everything is a matter of public record. Do you want your child reading 10 years from now a court transcript of how you thought she wasn't worth feeding and clothing. (or when your 80, in a nursing home and she has power of atty. as your next of kin) Our actions today can really put that bad karma train on our a** if we arent careful!
2007-11-12 21:44:39 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
dude it doesnt matter you are on the certificate as the father whether you are or not other than a court ordered dna test there isnt anything that you can do about it other than PAY THE DAMNED SUPPORT LIKE MILLIONS OF OTHERS thank you and as for you argueing and your excuses whats that all about you cant get out of it so pony up and pay it cause if not you could go to jail sounds like you had the fun makeing the child you should buck up and support it also
2007-11-13 01:38:33 · answer #9 · answered by the_orc_1 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The short answer is "Grab your ankles". The courts will look at it this way...it's not the child's fault that the parents both acted the way they did. The child is still entitled to support from both parents. The fact that you never got to be a part of your child's life won't even play into it. They will just want the money.
2007-11-12 21:38:03 · answer #10 · answered by J D 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋