I'm having a small wedding, but I would like to know about these traditions:?

Question

1.) Do I have to have bridesmaids? Can I just have my maid of honor?

2.) Do I have to have a dress rehersal and rehersal dinner?

3.) Do I pay the clergyman? Or do I just "tip" them? I don't understand how this works. :(

Answer 1

You can have just a maid of honor. Alot of smaller weddings go that route. You do not have to have a dress rehearsal actually most don't because it is considered bad luck from the groom to see the bride in her dress before the wedding. Just a rehearsal so people know when to walk and where to stand and so on. And different clergymen or officients handle payments differently. Some charge for the ceremony and others do it as a gift.

Answer 2

1) You can have as many (or as few!) people in the bridal party as you like. It is YOUR wedding, after all.

2) Traditionally, you have the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding. The reason for these is so that your ceremony runs smoothly and everyone knows when and where they need to be places. It also gives you a time to spend with your family before the chaos ensues. But since you're having a small wedding, if you think you can instruct everyone the day of the ceremony, you can forgo the rehearsal.

3) Yes, you always tip the clergyman. At least $50. Some do have rates though, you should ask beforehand.

Answer 3

i got married a year ago and I can totally help you out.

1. You don't have to have bridesmaids but in a church it is generally accepted that you have a maid of honour to sign the register, 2 bridesmaids and a flower girl. If your worried about dresses for the bridesmaids I went to a fashion warehouse and got some latest fashion formal dresses for a really great price and they looked great.

2. You don't have to have a dress rehearsal or a rehearsal dinner but it helps to let everyone know what to do.

3. You don't have to pay or tip the clergyman but it is generally accepted that you give a donation to the church of a few hundred dollars and you give it to the priest after the ceremony.

Another tip too is that it is traditional in catholic religion to invite the priest to eat with you at the reception but if your not catholic I'm not sure of the tradition there.

I hope I was helpful.
Congratulationa and I hope you have a great day.

Answer 4

Hi and congratulations!

Small wedding are really nice!

1. No...you most certainly DO NOT have to have bridesmaids. As a matter of fact, with it being a small wedding, I think it's much nicer to just have a maid of honor and best man.

2. No...you do not have to have a rehearsal dinner, however, you will need to have a rehearsal of some kind at your venue. Traditionally it is nice to have a small dinner after the rehearsal. It can be very simple.....just you, your groom, maid of honor, best man and your parents? Where I live, some people just go out for pizza after!

3. Call the clergy person and ASK him/her what their FEE IS!!! No...you don't just "tip" them....usually they have a set fee...so do inquire!

Good luck!

Answer 5

1. You don't need attendants, just two adult witnesses.
2. You don't have a dress rehearsal, but it's a good idea to have a rehearsal the evening before. A dinner isn't required, where I come from, everyone would just gather at someone's home after the rehearsal for drinks and snacks.
3. Contact the church office to see if there's a set fee for the clergyman. If there isn't, an honorarium of about 200 would be appropriate.

Answer 6

Congrats on the upcoming wedding & good luck.

1. You don't need attendants. Your maid of honor will be your witness (for you license)

2. No need to have a rehearsal and dinner. As long as your officiant knows or someone in charge can tell everyone where to stand, not a problem. That's the main reason for a rehearsal. We had a quick rehearsal at the church and did not have a dinner.

3 - Clergy - if you're having it at your church, they don't usually charge because the minister is technically "paid" by the church so you "tip" the minister to cover his/her time. BUT If you're hiring a wedding officiant (I go to people's locations to perform their wedding) there is a fee involved like any other wedding vendor.

Answer 7

1. You can have as few or as many as you like, and you can give them whatever title you like, bridesmaid, maid of honour, bridal attendant, whatever, they are all roughly the same thing.

2. No, this is not a tradition that we have in the UK, it seems to be a US thing but is definitely not required by law.

3. I had a registry office wedding so we paid for that, some churches do charge, others don't, ask at the one you are using.

Answer 8

1) you don't need bridesmaids or maid of honour. so just a maid of honour is fine fine fine :)
2) you don't need to have dress rehersal or any of that. we had rehearsed the ceremony with the celebrant the day before the wedding just to be on the safe side.
3) oooh.. i don't know! just ask i guess :)

Answer 9

1) you don't have to have bridesmaids. you don't even really need a maid of honor. just at least 2 people as witnessess.... doesn't matter who.

2) you don't have to practice the wedding at all... theres really no need to unless you feel like you have to... if you want the ceremony to go perfectly then do it. If you don't mind the casual mistake that makes everything seem more real and comfortable... a slip up of one word where everyone can laugh smile and remember how cute it was when his face went bright red... :)

and 3.... i've got no idea either.. Sorry :(

Answer 10

I too had a very small wedding (14 people including our officiant and us). Here's what we did...

1. We had our brothers be our witnesses. Basically they stood up with us during the ceremony, handed us the rings, and signed our marriage license.

2. We did not have a rehearsal at all. It was so small we figured the only way to screw it up was if either of us (bride or groom) didn't show up. Instead, we were married on the Oregon Coast and my husband's mother had a fish fry the night before at the beach house we were staying at (the gift to all the men who traveled to our wedding was a fishing trip, so they had a ton of fish to cook).

3. Our officiant was a friend of ours. We paid for his travel expenses and then we gave him a $100 gift certificate to his favorite store. He was beyond thrilled with the gift. Plus he got a free weekend trip.

I hope that helps, congrats!