I have a very dear close aunt who has been an extra parent for me since I was a kid. Now that I am an adult, we are able to hang out together although I wouldnt say we are close as she is still more of an authoritative person to me. We are from different countries and recently her serious boyfriend came to the city I live to start work. She asked me to get in touch with him to make sure he's alright etc. So I did and we became friends. I felt a bit sorry for him to be in a strange place and he would ask me if i would have dinner with him a few times and I did.
One day he invited himself when i mentioned i was going clubbing with my friends and I welcomed him. His reason was that he'd like to see the club. So we went and everyone had fun although he trying to get a bit cosy with my girlfriend and I by dancing too close or hugging too tight when pictures were to be taken. It gave my friends and I uncomfortable vibes although i was still sticking up for him saying he's just drunk.
At about 4am we all started to leave and my girlfriend sarah and I had to work the next day so we were esp in a rush. But then my 'uncle' told me that he had to come back to my place because he had something really important to tell me and once he did,i might faint so he needed to tell me at my place. Straight away my friends and i thought it was weird and we refused but he still walked with us when we were walking so i was in two minds as he is still my aunt's bf and i didnt wanna offend him but also he was being really creepy. In the end my friend offered her place for us to talk. We went, and the 'news' he told me wasn't that big a deal and he was taking forever to finish a drink after that conversation was over and we still kept rushing him but he wouldnt leave. In the end sarah told me to go home and sleep and she would handle my 'uncle'. The next day sarah said he left an hour after i did, and talked so much and non stop. He even made too many compliments to her and asked her number but she refused. He told her he wanted to ask her out.
Now- he told my aunt that he went home after 5am but didnt say he was at my friend's place. He even had the knack of asking my aunty to ask me for sarah's number to which i refused too.
He's just received news that he will be transferring to another country. So a few days ago when my aunt was not with him, he called me and told me that he likes me and wishes he was 20 years younger and was sorry to leave the country because of me as he'd want to be close to me. He even asked me if i could meet him alone without her. I made it clear to him that I wasnt interested because -HELLO!- he's dating my aunty for god's sakes. He doesnt think that this is an important factor but i told him no anyways. Ever since then i have hardly answered his calls and only speak to him when i need to.
Before this whenever he did anything annoying or made jokes that were too much and if i were to complain about him embarassing me by telling other things private things about me she would firstly- tell him off, then tell me that he probably didnt mean it, and then she'd laugh about it. Even when I'm clearly upset about something. She seems to defend him.
My dilemma now is that I dont know whether I should brush this off,or should I tell her. My friends think I should just let it go because he's only flirting and hasn't physically tried anything. Plus since he's leaving the country anyway. If I told her I would be in their bad books plus make things very uncomfortable for everyone. Plus there is a chance he would say he was just joking and she would believe him thus making me look like a fool.
2007-11-12 20:07:10 · 3 answers · asked by suzi q 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you love your aunt and wish her well, you should tell her that she's dating a jerk. If she wants details, you can just tell her about his behavior at the club *in general* you don't have to say he was flirting with and hitting on you, as that is really close to home and might hurt her, but you can tell her that he was flirting with and hitting on much younger women, and even on your friends (she probably already has an idea if he asked her to get your girlfriend's number for him!!!). Ask yourself this question...if your friend or family member observed your boyfriend doing these types of things, would you want them to tell you?
2007-11-12 20:19:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just avoid him until he leaves. If it ever happens that he comes back to the country, tell your aunt that he really made you and your friends uncomfortable due to the age difference and you would prefer that he not visit you.
In the meantime, if he bothers you anymore, tell him straight out that he makes you uncomfortable because he reminds you of a father. That should back him off. If it doesn't tell him that he is too old to be hanging with you and your friends, and that your friends said that they would rather not be around him.
2007-11-12 20:21:06 · answer #2 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
kick the hell out of him thats the best thing to do
best of luck and give one kick in my name
2007-11-12 20:17:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋