My gf and I are 21 and have been dating 1 yr+ and have gotten serious: planning engagement. Lately, she will invite me over and watch tv, immerse herself on her computer, or do hw and kind of ignore me until we go to bed. In addition, shes in a sorority, and I feel like her sorority, work, and family all come before i do with anything and i seem to be there for when she wants me there. I have to,key word I, plan everything we do around those things..if we have plans and something comes up she will drop our plans. Plus sex doesn't just 'happen', I have to tell her I want sex so I feel like I'm begging. I've tried talking to her and she says everything is fine and then backfires questions on me making me feel like **** for asking. I just want her to respect my feelings and I feel like she doesnt care. I do everything for her and love her to death. I thought maybe I should give her space since we are together 24/7, but she said that she has plenty. Advice Please?
2007-11-12 19:54:03 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sounds as if she is a very busy person. She may even be overly active, which causes a person to constantly be doing something to occupy themselves. First make sure that you are not just being too needy.
Once you have determined that, then tell her that you are feeling neglected lately. Tell her that you would like to set aside one day in which the two of you could just talk and spend time together without all of the interruptions, computer, and housework. Tell her that you would like to figure a way to put more romance into the relationship. Ask for suggestions and give her some of yours.
I will tell you that girls of that age do not have the sex drive that men do in most cases. A woman usually reaches her sexual peak at 35-40 or 45 years old. You can, however, ask that she initiate sex sometimes. Tell her that you are trying to get things worked out between the two of you prior to getting married, so that you will have a happy married life.
Just remember that because you are together so much, as you will be when you are married, she has things that need taking care of besides just sitting with you giving you attention. Maybe you need some interests of your own too, to occupy those times.
I hope I have helped. Good Luck!!!
2007-11-12 20:10:27 · answer #1 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's quite possible that she's feeling ignored on the other side, or like you put other things in front of her and is trying to show you how it feels. I know if my fiance seems to pull away, I can't help but get cold and impersonal at times. It's usually that I'm hurt by something, or need some attention and romance. I don't relaly have any advice, other than to try to figure out her feelings; I know that's extremely difficult though. Maybe plan a romantic evening away from her home; it could be that she's just bored with what you guys have been doing. Then romance, might just lead to sex. [though, obviously, that should not be your reason for doing so]
2007-11-13 04:02:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She doesn't love you. To her, you are an accessory. She has her work, her studies, her family, her sorority, and her boyfriend. You fill the space in her life where she thinks a boyfriend should go. If you vanished from her life, she'd just find some other guy to fill this space. She gives you sex as a reward to keep you around and in line. And this is how it's going to be when you are married.
Seriously, you are a long way from the center of her universe, yet she is the sun about which you orbit. I don't know what you want to do about this but you sure need to do something or your life is going to be miserable.
2007-11-13 04:09:08 · answer #3 · answered by Bethany 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
there can be two reasons..if she really loves u
1. she really is immersed in her work....so u need to remind her about urself n how u feel........
even stubbornly if needed
2. she wants to have ur attention....actually she wants to share something wth u but just cant face u...,so she is ignoring u..
So my dear friend in any case...get her beautiful flowers n tell her how beautiful she is....... that how much u love her n need her support throughout life....
i assure u she will be happy if she wants to be with u..
n let me know if it worked............
I tell u .............girls need a lot of pampering..!!!!!
2007-11-13 04:23:31 · answer #4 · answered by nishu 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well thats how its gonna be once u get married and stuff but wat i cant understand is y do u have to ask for sex? HAHA mann if u guys keep kissin and touchin each other then itll automatically happen u no...u dont need to ask unless u two aint that romantic
2007-11-13 03:59:48 · answer #5 · answered by Letsgofishing 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seems she does not really love you, why not try to have a serious talk with her. If things cannot be changed, why not try to find someone who really loves you?
a lot of big beuaties are on plusmeet dot com
come on!
2007-11-13 04:51:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
get urself busy & show her u r equally important to ppl as she is & ignore her few times so she learn that ur time is limited & she can't control u
2007-11-13 03:58:09 · answer #7 · answered by Joe 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
One friendly advise: if she loves you more than you know, then be more loyal to her.
2007-11-13 06:25:43 · answer #8 · answered by Dens 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey! man....premarital sex doesn't result positive!
2007-11-13 04:02:35 · answer #9 · answered by denden 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋