I've been together with my boyfriend for 1 month so far. Yet I found myself not too comfortable with some of his habits. For example, he drinks 20 beers and smoke weed several times per night. I tried to tell him to cut down the amount but he said I'm not his mother and he won't change even he drinks/smokes a lot. In fact, he doesn't change much even after he drinks/smokes alot (no strange act), but I'm very worry about his potential health problems in the future. He is a very sporty and active person. He's 30 yrs old now and seems to have good health so far...except some coughing in the morning. Everytime I ask him to drink/smoke less, we end up arguing and he seems not willing to change for anyone. Can someone tell me what I can do to make him drink/smoke less?
2007-11-12 17:52:05 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thanks for the answers. By the way, I don't know much about weed. Some people say weed can damage the brain and lead to strange acts. Then why can my boyfriend still behave normally even after smoking a lot of weed ?
2007-11-12 18:20:15 · update #1
stop sleeping with him? i dunno... but whatever he's doing, he doesn't seem to be changing because it's making him happy and you need to evaluate whether or not it's fair to ask him to change for you.
2007-11-12 17:59:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just leave the guy alone. I know it's tough. BReak ups are always tough. Always! This guy is unstable. I don't think it's BS if he says it is more about him than you especially sicne he used to cut himself. That shows he has some serious issues. 3 months isn't that long. It is always tougher to get over someone when you go to the same school and seem them all the time. There is no secret. Just try to relax and focus on other things. Believe me if there were a secret to gettin gover a break up then it could sold for billions of dollars but there's not. The only things you will hear are be patient and don't dwell on the past too much. Nothing else you can do. First breakups always seem like the end of the world. Then you will come to terms with things and be happy again.
2016-04-03 22:12:46 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's 30 years old and he's not going to change. You can't make someone change just because you want them to. He will only give it up if he chooses to and that may be never. He obviously cares more about his habit then he does about anything else and unfortunately he's not going to change for you. I speak from personal experience. I think it's time you find another guy. I'm not trying to be mean but its the truth.
2007-11-12 17:58:07 · answer #3 · answered by Michy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its simple.....send him back to the shop and exchange him for one that doesn't drink every day and smoke weed :-)
If you are shopping for a man why pick one with habits you don't like when there are PLENTY without those habits?
You can't change HIM but you can change him - as in trade him in for a better model...its not functioning well - is it?
You might not get a refund - but you can get an exchange! lol
2007-11-12 18:00:55 · answer #4 · answered by chandra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One of the problems with being with someone you really like and they have alcohol or drug dependency is that in the long run they bring you down with them.
Honey, he's not the last man on earth ok.
Unless you have some serious insecurity problems, kick him to the curb. You are not going to be able to fix him or his problems.
He has to want to and if he doesn't respect you enough to care that it bothers you, then why would you want him? Are you that hard up for men in your town? Get out before he convinces you to do something illegal for him "because you love him".
2007-11-12 18:03:18 · answer #5 · answered by Christy W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to realize that he will NEVER change. You have to decide if you can be comfortable around someone like this and if you can't there's your answer. It's only been a month. No offense here, but maybe you should consider not being with this person.
2007-11-12 18:01:53 · answer #6 · answered by countrygirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
*Sighs* I've Been There..He Started To Abuse Me So I Left...My Advice Is To Try And Work Things Out...If His Problems Get To Much Leave...You Can't Change Him...You'll Find Someone Much Fitting To Your Love...Best Wishes!!
2007-11-12 17:58:32 · answer #7 · answered by ~*~Bu113f1y K1ss3s~*~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
homie sounds awesome, can he hook me up with some good bud? Don't try to change the dude, only bitches do that. Unless you want a man who's going to be miserable and resentful of you for as long as you're with him, either accept his habits or find yourself another dick to suck.
2007-11-12 18:00:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately there is nothing you can do. He has to want to stop. His trip is one way and down hill. You've only known him a month. Get out now before he drags you down with him.
2007-11-12 18:01:47 · answer #9 · answered by Robere 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cant change someone. If he isn't willing to stop what he is doing because it hurts you to see him that way he doesn't deserve you. My advice is find someone you dont have to change and who appreciates what you do.
2007-11-12 18:00:24 · answer #10 · answered by Rodent 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change a man. You either love him for who he is, or you leave him and go find someone more suited to you.
2007-11-12 17:56:07 · answer #11 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋