My Friend just died?

Question

My friend just died and it has been so hard to get over it any ways i can get over this?

Answer 1

I am very sorry for your loss. Yes, it is very hard to get over something like this, especially if you had to watch your friend get sicker and sicker. You have to let yourself be sad now. You have to grieve for the friendship that you have lost, and for the life that your friend lost. Sometimes it is hard to let ourselves grieve and sometimes people tell us that life goes on and we have to get over it. Yes, you will have to get over it, but in your own time. Allow yourself the time you need. Find someone to talk to about how you feel. There are probably grief counselors in your area, possibly a support group as well. Get involved with something like that.

When you are ready, ask yourself what your friend would want you to do. Most likely your friend would want you to go on and enjoy life for both of you, go on and do all the things you might have done together, and continue to do the things you used to enjoy doing together.

Take care of yourself. You are not alone.

Answer 2

I really feel for you ,as my father also died of cancer and it was really hard at times to see the suffering he went through with the Chemo and Radio therapy and also the way in which my mother coped mostly on her own ,as I was at work at the time and could only help her on the odd occassions and at weekends ,but I must say when we found out that the cancer had gotten to my fathers liver and we were told that he would only have but a couple of weeks, if that to live, but with the extra chemo ,they could prolong this ,My father had had enough by then and just wanted it to all end .In some ways it was a hard decision to have to take inand come to terms with but in other ways I think we all knew that his pain and suffering would soon be at an end and both me and my mother agreed that going through all the chemo again was a waste of our precious time that we had together as a family .Needless to say ,my father died within the week of hearing that the cancer had gone to his liver and in some ways this was a sense of relief.You may never get over the death of your friend but think about what she must have went through .I also lost my brother some 14 years ago, to a suspected suicide and I can tell you now this hit me more ,like a ton of bricks ,it also hit my mother and father hard too because it was so unexpected .But with my fathers death I felt a sudden calming influence ,it may seem strange and difficult to describe ,but we knew my fathers death was enevitable ,where as my brothers death was a massive shock to the system .But another thing is that both me and my mother will always hold both my father and brother in our memories and close in our hearts and that is all that matters now .I've got a family of my own now with a loving wife and daughter and my mother is still battling on .So this is our future now and this is what keeps us going !

With warm regards

Jerry

Answer 3

I went through the same difficult experience recently after a much beloved relative passed away. A friend sent me a book entitled How To Go On Living When Someone You Love Dies by Therese A. Rando, PhD. I found the book to be very helpful for dealing with my grief and getting through the grieving process. Good luck to you during this difficult time.

http://www.amazon.com/Living-When-Someone-Love-Dies/dp/0553352695

Answer 4

This takes time. I'm sorry for your loss. Little by little you will feel somewhat better. It is a process that sometimes you might not realize you are better unless you compare it to an earlier time in your grieving. It is okay to cry. Find supportive people to talk to. I went to a bereavement support group and found that helpful after I thought I might have been driving everyone crazy with my outpourings of grief. It helped and I learned a lot about what I was going through and met some very supportive people.

Answer 5

It is very difficult to see a loved one suffer from this terrible disease. You may never get over it completely. When my father died, he didn't find out about the cancer until it was too late. They did radiation and chemo but all that did was make his kidneys fail and his heart. He ended up dying from the side effects of the cancer treatment instead of the cancer himself. He turned from a proud, stocky, stubborn man into a small old man who couldn't speak or even recognize us. It was terrible. I will never get over the way he died but I have learned to cope with it. I just know he is in a better place now and that is how you have to think of your friend.

Answer 6

Hi, I'm so sorry,its so hard for you at the moment. I think the best answer I can give you is that you will never really get over this but will get used to living with it. But the pain will ease and you will start to have happy memories, and those are what you hang on to and remember your friend and you being happy together, as Im sure thats what she would want. For you to be happy. Take care

Answer 7

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend.

Truth is... time will be the only thing that will heal that. You could try getting a journal and writing your feelings down, no matter what they are. Talk w/her family and keep in touch w/them; you'll always feel 'connected'....

Most importatly, remember the good times you and your friend shared together. Write them down and relive them... your friend will always be with you that way.

Answer 8

If you're really having a hard time, you may have what is called "complicated grief". It is from being traumatized by the death of a loved one, and it's often hard to sort out on one's own.
I have recently done grief counseling for the loss of several people in my life and it was very effective. I would suggest you seek counseling if you are having a hard time dealing with this yourself. It really helps.

Answer 9

i recommend that you visit the American Cancer Society web site, make a page to remember your friend and join the support group. when my father died his doctor told me about it. i tried it and i recommend it to every one who has lost a friend, family member or any one to this horrific thing we call cancer

Answer 10

http://www.groww.org/ visit this site